French Observations October 2011

Gypsy:

One day not too long ago, I was driving from Gréoux to Manosque. I was running late to pick up the kids from school. At the top of the hill btw the 2 towns on the plateau was a man pulled over on the side of the road with his car. He was running about on the street flagging people down for help. Most people drove passed him. At first he looked Indian, so I though he might be a poor Indian ITER employee who has car problems and needs help and being foreign, doesn't know what to do. I pulled over and he came up to me, he spoke poor French, so I spoke to him in English. His English was ok, but not great. He said he is from Turkey and he has his family in the car and he's out of gas. My instinct was to call the police for help for him, but he asked me for money to get gas.

This was the first red flag. But, I know that if he came from Turkey, maybe his bank card doesn't work and maybe he couldn't find the gas station in Manosque because they aren't obvious and easy to find. So, I gave him 20€. He offered to give me his gold necklace or his gold ring. I said no, just take the money and I left. His whole family inside his car was thanking me.

I was feeling pretty good about myself. Like I'm a good samaritan who helped another person in need until....................

2 days later when I saw the same man, on the same side of the road, at the same time of day, doing exactly the same thing. I was pissed. He was parked on the opposite side of the road and I couldn't make out his license plate number. I debated whether or not I should call the police. After I got the kids and came back, I was hoping he would still be there and I could get a better look at his license plate and perhaps ask for my money back, but he was already gone. I've kept a look out since, but have never seen him again.

I heard he scammed another one of my friends in a different area of town, same story, same gimmick. As I was infuriated at the man who cried wolf, I told my neighbor and without going into details, she said so he offered to give you a silver necklace or other jewelery item in return? Uh hm. She said, he's a gypsy. NEVER give them any money. I've learned my lesson. It turns you a little callous, which is not a good thing.

Phone Company:

We went to our phone company called Orange on Oct 13 to change our contract because we were being severly overcharged. We have an internet phone and a landline as well. We had a bill for the internet phone (internet, satellite included) for over 100€, then a separate phone bill just for the landline through France Telecom for 38€. Xavier was pissed, so we decided to stop the landline. Then our internet phone stopped working. This means I can no longer call people for free especially the US. Today is Oct 28, 3 phone calls later to Orange, still no phone. Everytime I called Orange they said it was because our new contract wasn't finished being processed and therefore there is nothing they can do until it's finished. IF our phone still doesn't work by Oct 28, which we ALL know will certainly be the case, then I'm supposed to call back and then they will actually begin resolving the problem. So, today I called yet again and explained the situation. They said they don't know what the problem is, but they will call me back on Tuesday Nov 1. I said "are you actually going to do anything between now and tues?" They said they think the problem is from their hardware someplace, or maybe my phone cable, or maybe my phone jack in the wall. They really don't know. If they cannot solve it, then on Tues they will explain it to me, then put me on a list for sending out a technician, you know like a week later to resolve the problem. I will be going at least 1 full month without a phone. I will try to negotiate not paying the full bill since I haven't had full service, though I know that in France, that will be an exercise in futility. I'll let you know at what date, I will actually receive the service I pay for.

One more thing, when we changed our contract, our new contract comes with something useless but costly called 3G and Gigamail. We want neither. The guy representing Orange signing us up is somehow NOT able to NOT sign us up for these options. If we want to "Delete" them, then I have to call Orange myself. Now, I DID call Orange and was able to delete gigamail after about 1 excruciating hour on the phone, however, they were not able to delete 3G. You see, it is NOT their department, and they cannot transfer me. So, as polite and as seemingly excellent service as they offer, I will have to call back the main line and ask for commercial service to get rid of 3G. And by the way, EVERY time I call my own phone company for anything, I pay per minute to resolve my own phone issues. Now, that's what I call EXCELLENT customer service!

The Bank:

Now that we have established the wonderful efficiency of French phone companies, let us expound on the BANK EXPERIENCE.

I bounced a check, well 3 checks to be exact. Whoops. I wasn't watching my account closely, it is my fault. 2 were to the canteen at the kids school. I wrote those checks in June. They bounced in July, then all banking hell broke lose. Overnight, ALL my cards and checks froze. I could no longer access anything. I have 2 banks. 1 in Manosque near me, 1 in Aix. I only bounced checks at the bank in Manosque, yet somehow EVERY bank I own in France went into blackout.

Now being checks to the school, the school closes during the summer. By the time we figured out which checks bounced, mind you, I called my bank numerous times and even physically went in and asked the simple question "which checks bounced?" The answer from the banker always was "I don't know." Surprisingly, that answer just isn't much help. If they are able to freeze my account, you'd think they'd be able to do a little research to find where the problem originated.

So, my husband being good and thorough, went through our mail to hunt down the letters from the banks and make sense of everything. The school being a school closes down in the summer, so I had to wait until Sept for everyone to come back to work to resolve the problem. Now we are 2 mos without access to my account. Xavier had to buy the gas and pay the groceries. We ran out of checks and our bank refused to send us more since I was in a bank blackout. Finally I got from my bank that I need to physically get the checks back and bring them along with a receipt to the bank. Now I have 2 days off mon, thurs. The bank is closed on mon. This doesn't leave much opportunity to resolve things.

I finally got the checks from my school. They said that I then needed to bring them cash. How? I asked when I cannot use a cash machine? So I went back to the bank on wed morning when I was in Manosque every wed and asked for the cash. Brought the cash to the school on Thurs. Once I procured the checks and the receipt I waited again until I could go to the bank. Everything was supposed to be in order. The 3rd check was to a grocery store in Lyon and after a few phone calls, Xavier negotiated with them to pass the check on through a second time.

On Wed, my bank now had ALL the information they should need to get the issue resolved. However, NEVER trust a french bank. So, the following Wed, I went back to see what was "happening" since I was still sitting pretty in blackout. They said they were still missing a check. I said no you have the check. They argued with me. I said look for it, you have it, there is nothing I can do. She looked and oh my goodness, the check was just sitting there in the pile. It never got processed. 1 week wasted.

The following Wed, I go back to the bank and said "so, what's going on?" Why can I not yet use my cards? She said it is now at the bank of france, it will take about 15 days to process so you should be good by the first week of oct. Remember, I'm in blackout, I have no checks, I cannot pay bills and I have to come to Manosque to the bank physically to take cash out. They are not open on mon, sun and are closed during lunch hours and basically any time someone is NOT at work. They are open Sat morning for about 2 hrs. DO I really want to drive 1/2 hr there and back to get cash?? That's an awful lot of gas to waste, esp when a full take costs about 75€. I said how can 15 days take me all the way into Oct? Do you mean 15 business days? As in 3 weeks? "uh, yes ma'am." Then you should say 3 weeks.

So, every couple of days I called the bank. Same response, we don't know. We cannot contact the Bank of France, I just have to wait. "Can I call the bank of france myself?" "No, ma'am, you cannot call them, they don't have a phone number, no one can call them." Every Wed, I went into the bank and asked about the progress. No ma'am nothing's changed yet. Finally, after 3 weeks, I went into the bank yet again and they said, Oh yeah, it looks like the bank of france lifted the blackout, but it was LCL who was freezing my accounts. I said, "so, can you take off the freeze?" They did, then we said we want to close our account.

Xavier has been trying to close the account for over 1 year. He sent certified letters, we came into the bank. This last reason is oh, yeah, once we got a letter returned to us that we sent to you, so you need to bring us proof of your address. We need a bill from the electric company that is less than 3 months old. In the meantime, they are charging us like 30€ in charges every month per account. Xavier was so pissed. I finally made an appointment with our banker for Thurs, you know the one day I don't work, the bank is open, and I don't have children with me. Our banker, Mme Yde said yes, she closed the account of my husband and transferred everything into my account. His account had 0€.

Then, I had to go back to the bank to make sure everything was in order for my account because I wanted to close it as soon as the blackout was lifted. Xavier was no longer working at ITER at this point and was going to go to Morocco soon, so I wanted to bring him with me, just in case, you know, so if he needed to, he could "go French" at someone. Mind you, we showed up there in the morning. We asked about Xavier's account and they said, no it's not closed, and showed that there was money in it. Xavier was infurious! We demanded to speak to Mme Yde and that we are closing both accounts right now, today and want paper proof of the close. At that particular moment, Mme Yde was present and had NO ONE in her office, but in order to talk to her, we must make an appointment to come back in the afternoon. Xavier wanted it to be clear. We asked what must we bring to close our accounts?

The answer was the usual ID, proof of address, bank transfer paper to the new bank, electric or water bill that is less than 3 mos old or rental agreement, and this was new, they wanted us to bring in ALL of our unused checks. We said "are you joking??? The account is closed, what will a check do??" She said it will put us back into blackout lockdown again and will be harder and more difficult to resolve.

We came back at 15:00 spoke to Mme Yde. She looked nervous. Xavier tried to remain calm and NOT go French at her. She closed the account and gave us proof of it. I now have a file going for LCL Bank because I still don't trust them. I understand now why Xavier was so keen on keeping French papers for years and years. In France, you absolutely have too! Never trust anyone.

In the meantime, my other bank in Aix. Apparently, I was still in blackout lockdown with them even though my bank account at LCL is closed. I called and they said it's because it takes 8-10 EXTRA days for the bank of france to lift the other accounts. That puts me in blackout for over 1 month. My extra problem is back in July, just before lockdown, I forgot my bank code and put in the wrong one 3X. Now I'm in blackout and lockdown from the Bank of France, but in special lockdown #2 for putting in the wrong code. The bank said I need to come and get a new card and give them the old card.

Remember they are located in Aix, I live 1 hr north of Aix. The toll road is 6€ to get to Aix, parking in Aix is an extra 4€ min, gas will be at least a quarter of a tank, about 15-20€. Total cost out of pocket to make a quick 1/2 day journey to Aix to swap bank cards is about 30€. Now, after some negotiation with my new bank, they offered to mail me the card with the assurance that I will be able to use my old code.

Remember bank of france lockout on HSBC last 4 weeks, after ban has been lifted and phone call to bank was made, it takes an extra week to receive new card. I had written down my old code, so am sure of the code being correct. Banker said in order to activate my card, I must buy something. I received my new card with great joy on Oct 24, the day Xavier was supposed to leave. I then went to a place and tried to spend some money on the card. What happened?? Card did NOT go through, it said I used a false code. I reluctantly tried a second time after much insistance from store owner.

Remember, 3 wrong codes keyed and card gets locked out again and will have to call bank for a new card and wait yet a minimum of 1 week. Xavier is leaving in 2 days. 2nd time, code came up false. I stopped and paid cash. I called the bank and she insisted that my code is correct. She said I should go to a cash machine and try it. I said "no." I asked her to please mail me my code. Xavier said my code should change and that the banker is wrong. So, I should be receiving my new code on Tues. Let's hope there won't be something wrong. I just might have to make that trip down to Aix afterall.

Xavier is now gone and I still don't have a functionning bank card. I at least have received checks, so I can buy groceries, etc. Let's hope for the best. Worse comes to worse, I might be able to cash a check at another bank if I need cash. Who knows??

Those are some thoughts and experiences I thought I'd like to share. Xavier said Casablanca is sort of like as he put it "hell." He said it's all the negative of Marseille, to the nth power. He said it is the opposite of Germany. It is dirty, polluted and totally chaotic. He said there is no real public transportation system and driving it is hell. There are donkeys on the street. Casablanca is an ugly dump. He also said that Rabat is not 1 hr away, but 2 hrs away, so we can forget about moving there. His job is south of Casablanca, so I said why don't we just live south. He said he almost got killed crossing the road in Californie. He said he has never feared as much for his life as trying to walk Casablanca. Which means, forget parking in Casablanca. Hmm, a bit of a problem.

He found a colleague who lives south in some sort of house/compound. His colleague will be moving soon and his house will be available. Apparently the house comes with a butler. Yes, that's right, the house comes with a butler. How the heck can a house come with a butler??? I'm thinking that's probably out of our price range. I'll have to go and see for myself.

Explanation: To go French at someone:

Verb (used both with and without object)

1. To yell at a person in a truly direct manner. Why the cuss are you unable to do what I'm asking?!

2. To lose all forms of sophisticated composure and let out ALL of your negative emotions in the exact way your are feeling them at that exact given moment. You are the most incompetent group of cuss cuss cusses I have ever met! How can you live with yourself?

3. Will probably include verbal expression of extreme dissatisfaction with a specific person and or the institution they represent. How many times do I have to come here to resolve this? It's as though I have to do your job for you? This is totally unacceptable! (followed by fist pounding on individual's desk)

4. Is usually in reaction to extreme incompetency.