Sunday, December 2, 2012

Snippets of Life in Canada with Kids

November
 Yesterday at the bus/metro station, the kids got all hyper while waiting for the bus. I told them to run down the hallway back and forth to burn their energy. At the end of the hallway is the exit. I said, "don't go out the door!" All went well...at first. They ran up and down happily a couple of times, then they all stopped at the exit. You could actually see them thinking, considering the one way exit turnstile. I left their backpacks on the seat
and ran down the hallway yelling, "I told you not to go out the door!" As I'm calling to them, I helplessly watch them exit through the turnstile one by one. Once outside, they realized they couldn't get back in. I have a card but doubt it would work if I swiped it 4 times, so I called for help. We ended up going back in through the handicap entrance with my card. I was relieved. Our bags were still there and we had to run to catch the bus. But all was well. Not sure the kids actually learned a lesson???
Finally got our OHIP card today. Now we'll be on the national insurance plan starting January. Took a couple of tries and a couple of weeks. Everything is a process. Since I'm not the one working, I have the legal status of a child. Pretty frustrating. (That is, until I go back to work.)
Planning our first X-mas holiday with my family and my children in Chicago, EVER. I've been wanting to come home for awhile. I want to introduce the kids to things like waffles, lox and bagels, shrimp with cocktail sauce, x-mas decorations, and spiral ham. Man oh man, have I missed that taste.
Xavier and I finally bought alcohol over the weekend for the first time since we've arrived in Canada 1 month ago. The boys have given me so much stress that I said, we need some wine, I need to self medicate. Honestly, I've been missing the taste of wine for awhile now. First Ramadan in July and August, then going to the states, where my parents don't really drink, then the move. Getting wine here, is a grandiose effort like it was in Morocco, just more expensive. And being a cheap person...well you can imagine.
Spent the bulk of the day busing the kids to the dentist. Spent 2 hrs there for a meet and greet with all 3 of my kids. Kids were agitated and hungry by the end. Left the office a little before 2 pm. Walked the kids down the street to Wendy's for lunch. Kid's behaviour was more or less horrific. Then, Austin had this brilliant idea to climb into one of the highchairs for babies. Nicolas, as always followed suit, thought only Nicolas was small enough to be able to climb back out again. I broke a sweat pulling on Autin's body to get
him out only ending in him crying from physical injury and still remaining lodged in the seat. The only alternative was to dump him on the dirty floor and slide him out upside down. He screamed when I did this, both shoes came off in the process, but after a lot of jimmying and pulling, he was finally free. My head was pounding by the time we got home. Started cruising jobs that require travel. At the moment, the thought of extensive time away from kids is appealing...
Sometimes I get an idea stuck in my head, even if it is far from rational or correct. Today's thought was dental appointment for all 3 kids. Took everyone out of school in the middle of the day, got on the bus, hoofed it to the dental office only for the secretary to tell me I got the day wrong. The appointment's for Thursday. Silly goosey. We stayed out, had lunch anyway. Kids were pretty psyched. Now, we get to do it all again Thursday. Felt like a nimrod. Can't even blame it on hormones.
Spent the weekend attempting to sew a Christmas stocking for Nicolas. We went around town and found a bunch of stores selling material, so Nico got to choose the color of his stocking. Anaïs decided she doesn't like hers (red) and tried to put in an order for a new one. I explained, I had the same stocking my whole life that my mom sewed for me when I was a child...The kids spent the rest of the day sewing Christmas stockings for the cat with the left over material. Now, they're waiting to make gingerbread houses. you know
3 kids = 3 houses. I think they have designs to make an entire winter village. That's another weekend long project. The prob is to not let them eat the house after it's built. I always find teeth marks in the stale gum drops torn off the sides of the house.
 
I received my Canadian Driver's License. Now, we can buy a car and get insurance. We're almost completely settled. The only thing left is my national insurance card. Waiting on proof of address from the bank 1st before I can get the card. Our second shipment (our furniture) should arrive by the end of the week. The rest are just details.
Sunday November 4 - Daylight Savings Starts Today in Ontario

Nico came in our room this morning pre-dawn to wake me up so I could open a lollipop for him from Halloween. I said don't come in knowing the cat hurled all over our bedroom last night and could see a pile laying by the bedroom door from the light in the hall. Nico didn't listen and instead stepped right into her puke. I had to get up, clean Nico, dress him since

his pj's were footsies and thus covered in cat hurl, then cleaned the floor. Forgot the hour changed here last night and started hustling everyone to get ready to go to church, so the kids could experience Sunday school. X got really PO'd since he woke up and I had the hour wrong. Oh well. We all got chewed out.
Our first of 3 shipments arrived from abroad 2 days ago. No place to put things since the house is so small, so our boxes are currently just sitting in the garage. The furniture should arrive in 2 weeks, then maybe sometime in 2013 our sea shipment should arrive from Morocco. Best I can say, no boxes were missing, however, I didn't open them yet to view their contents. We got our king size bed ripped off upon its arrival in Morocco along with our TV. Not sure how these items can go missing? Now, I'm just more aware and vigilant. Getting settled.


 
 
 

Friday, November 30, 2012

Public Catholic School

In Canada, kids have the option of going to public catholic school, free!

So, we live about 500 meters from the local public catholic school that my kids are now going. They have to wear a uniform, which is unfortunate, but oh well.

Good school, we're very happy. Kids seem more or less happy. Once they make some friends.

Kids come home with all sorts of questions. Heaven and hell are the current topics. Being uneducated in terms of religion, I am not a good source of information. The kids always ask me first for confirmation.

Actual conversation I had with my 7 yr old son

kid: Will I go to heaven?
mom : yes
kid: If I lie, will I go to hell?
mom: no
kid: well, my teacher says I will go to hell if I lie.
mom: do you think it's a good idea to lie?
kid: no
mom: neither does your teacher. Do you understand why your teacher doesn't want you to lie?
kid: yes
mom: if kids lie, then it would creat chaos, right? Therefore, you should always tell the truth. Do you think you will go to hell?
kid: no
mom: so what's the problem?
kid: will I or will I not go to hell if I lie?
mom: do you believe in hell?
kid: no
mom: neither do I
kid: but my teacher says I will go to hell if I lie.
mom: there are many philosophies regarding religion. The church talks about hell as a way of keeping a code of behavior for people to follow. So, you're going to hear about hell. Religion has black and white opposites like heaven/hell, good/bad, etc. Just because the church says something is, doesn't mean it's true.  It's just one philosophy of thought. You should listen to it, but also think for yourself.
kid: What do you think?
mom: personally, I believe in heaven though there is no proof. I need to believe. I don't believe in hell and I think all people, no matter how bad they are, go to heaven.
kid: Will I go to heaven?
mom: of course
kid: but, will I?
mom: What do you think?
kid: yes
mom: good, I agree


On the move again to Toronto, Canada

October 6th, 2012 we got on the plane and moved to Canada.

As usual, it was pretty stressful. I did the packing on my own. Xavier had to drive the Mustang back to France. He took about 5 days to drive it back to Lyon. The time he drove through Spain, they had these terrible floods and mudslides. Xavier said there was a piece of the highway missing, as in the bridge simply wasn't there anymore. It took him forever to drive through Spain with all of the road diversions.

As I packed, I was afraid our stuff would get stolen again. This time, I tried to cleverly write the contents of the boxes in German. I figured the movers and the customs agents would be less likely to read German than French or English. Then, I tipped the movers pretty well. Miraculously, so far, all of our boxes arrived in Canada (at least the air freight portion.)

We got out ok. For the first time, neither Xavier nor I got flagged by the authorities regarding the car. All that has been so stressful!

Canada has so far been the friendliest country I've ever lived in. It's like the US, but with some more social, higher taxes, higher cost of living than anywhere I've ever lived, and freedom of economy. It feels like Canada is, what the US was in the 1950's. I believe the US has gone into social free fall since the Reagan years and is slowly trying to correct itself. It has also been in a bad economic state since we left in 2004.

Everyone smiles and says hi to you here. People introduced themselves to us right away. It's lovely, though kind of shocking. I'm not sure how to behave. Weird, huh? That is, I'm not sure what the rules of politeness are here.  People seem kind of British. They wait patiently and don't yell at you or anything or tell you what to do. I never see any angry words or fist fighting in the street. I don't think, "am I going to get robbed today," when I'm outside or when I go to the bank. I don't worry about getting attacked when I go running in the green space near our house.

So, apparently, Canada  is known for its friendliness. 

Some things are easy, some things are not.
EASY: most utilities, SS#, DL
HARD: actually, relatively speaking, nothing has actually been hard. Sometimes there is a process and that can take a little time, but compared to Europe and Morocco, everything is simple here.

Things that annoy me: My husband is the one with the work permit. Since I'm not yet working, I'm attached to him and therefore have no more rights than a child.
Example:
1. Can't put any utilities in my name. I tried to cancel the cable, mind you, I'm the one who set it up, but they wouldn't let me. They said my husband has to call and cancel it.
2. Our Credit Card: called to get it unlocked and to get a new pin number sent to me - couldn't do anything because my husband is the primary person, we are NOT equal on the credit card. Therefore, my credit card remained locked.
3. Banks: totally messed up like Europe. My husband's name is on the account. Too difficult to change accounts. Checking accounts seem to be a problem. When renting, you have to post date 12 months of rental checks. Only Xavier's name is on the checking account. No for some reason they cannot add me to the account. We would have to close the account, then re-open a new one. Too complicated, so now Xavier has to sign checks for me when I need one.  Really irritating.

Scams: Beware of moving companies.
We bought furniture from a woman doing an estate sale. Basically, we bought the entire contents of her house. I had no desire to move all that furniture myself, plus we have no car. I found a moving company on kijiji. They quoted me for $180.00 for 1 truck, 2 men and 4 hrs of work.

I didn't want anything professional, just throw the stuff in a truck and get it out of there. My husband has no car and the bus wasn't running in the middle of the day, so when he finally got to the woman's house the men asked him to sign something and pay a down payment of $300.00. Xavier complied. After the truck was loaded, the guys told him to sign another piece of paper and to pay them $1,200.00 up front in cash or they wouldn't deliver the goods. When I found this out, I called the manager and told him we agreed on a price and this is totally unacceptable. He told me my husband signed a contract. I said I was not going to pay a cent until I looked this contract over myself and then we would discuss this further, un beknownst to me my husband feeling trapped already paid them the money they had asked. I had no written proof of the verbal agreement. I was totally enraged by this. For that price, we would have rented a U-haul and done it ourselves.

I called the police and they kindly came over to the house to take my statement. They told me I have to get every detail written out and that there is absolutely nothing they can do. I said this is fraud. They agreed, but again, there is nothing they could do. The police were really apologetic since we're new to Canada and already we got scammed. If it were any other country, I would have been 10X as angry. At least in English, I'm aware of everything that happened.

Scams happen here as much as they do in the states. It's unfortunate, but that's the way it is. Other than that, getting settled seems to be quite effortless outside of trying to get a phone. Rogers, the main phone company likes the 2 yr contract plan, which is completely insane, especially since Rogers is a monopoly.

Data Download: now here is something totally outdated in canada. Unlimited WIFI - forget it. Doesn't exist. The phone company is living in the past. They actually charge you based on your datadownload. Who on Earth knows of their download?? Once you go over, they nickel and dime you and nail your wallet. Like those horrible cell phone charges when you go over your limit. Yes, that too ought to be passé, but it's not. Even the developing world has unlimited internet access. The phone company here still has a lot to learn. Until change happens (ie break up the phone companies, in other words, Rogers cannot have the power behind the other phone companies if you actually want to break it up), we're all chained to it.

Buying a car: Hmmm. Doesn't look like it's going to happen. Credit in the USA? Sorry folks, no credit checks in the US, even though it's a 1.5 hr drive to the border. Our options are as follows: Buy a very expensive 2-yr lease, buy a used car cash, try and get a loan on a car in the states and bring it over (way more complicated, but doable, I think.) So, the family and I are still busing and hoofing it and renting a car on the weekend to do our shopping. Gotta say, it's working out quite well. 

By the way, brrrr, it's cold!!! -4 celcius today. We're not even in winter yet. Yikes!!!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

The Dreaded "P" Question

I suppose it could be worse.
It could be the "when are you due?" question.

Honestly, I get the "P" question too often. But, I suppose, after 3 kids, the body is supposed to show evidence of child bearing, right? So, the most recent conversation went down like this...

I'm at the water park with my kids and a girlfriend and one very nice lady I've met for the first time. I'm wearing my bikini, not much place to hide there. I'll refer to her as Woman A.

Woman A turns to me and says, "I hope you don't take this the wrong way..."

Internal Dialogue:
Oh great, she's going to ask me the "P" question.

Woman A: Are you pregnant?

Internal Dialogue: Yep, there it is.

Me: No...I know, I just look pregnant.

Woman A (obviously embarrassed by her faux pas, tries to recover): No, well, you're just so thin and you have a little belly, you know? But lucky you, you don't have any stretch marks!

Internal Dialogue: Well, at least she's trying...

Me: I know, I got lucky. That's probably why I have a little belly, since I didn't get any stretch marks, I had to get something.

Woman A: Well, at least you don't have belly fat.

Me: Well, actually I do have some, but that's okay. My body is what it is, so...

Sadly, I have experienced the "P" question many times. Once was at Xavier's grandma's 100th birthday party. I wore a body hugging dress. To my horror, my father-in-law came up to me with one of his female relatives in tow, with a big slightly drunken smile on his face and loudly exclaimed in front of the entire party:
"MY COUSIN AND I WERE TALKING ABOUT YOU AND HOW YOU LOOK IN THAT DRESS. YOU HAVE QUITE A BELLY...SO, IS THERE A BABY IN THERE?
It was obvious, my father-in-law proudly and astutely believed he had unearthed a secret.

Me: "Well, Daniel, no. I just look pregnant."

Daniel (Obviously did not believe me, thought I was being coy): "You are expecting, aren't you?"

Me: "Daniel, if I was a few months pregnant, I wouldn't be able to be here, I'd be at home vomiting into a toilet."

Daniel: "Oh"

I felt the need to explain
Me: "After Nico was born, I got an IUD and immediately afterward, my stomach popped out. It has never gone back down, I need to get this thing removed."

Daniel: "Oh, okay, sorry."

Me: "No problem, I know I look pregnant, I don't blame you for asking, I would also ask, myself."

Problem is: Have since removed the IUD and still getting the "P" question. However, there is a remarkable difference, now instead of looking 3 mos pregnant, I look about 1.5 mos. I don't think the "P" question will ever stop.

Went to the gynecologist and she told me I was crazy and that it was all in my head. I lined up sideways and said, "look at my stomach, that's not normal." She said it is a medical mystery. She said I'm "lucky considering" and that it could be worse. She listed off a slew of things I've never even heard of (after effects of child birth) such as hanging lower belly fat or something like that?! I thought, I'll never complain again. She said she can't imagine my IUD affecting my body in the way I'm insisting it has. She said, "maybe it's gas."
"So, I've been bloated from gas for 4 yrs? Don't you think if it were gas I'd just fart?"
She checked, not gas. So, after IUD removal, stomach went down noticeably within 48 hrs.  I'm still happy to have my body back, even if it's still with a belly, at least I know it's rightfully mine.

Surfing, Bike Riding, Swimming, Ice Skating 08/2012

Surfing and Bike Riding:
Anaïs has started surfing. In her words, "It's totally awesome!" It's great to see her in a little wet suit up on the surf board. She road waves the first day she tried it. I must say I am totally impressed. She is very, very athletic. Austin also had a go at surfing, but he fell a few times and doesn't really enjoy it. He literally just started to learn how to swim this summer. He also finally learned how to ride a bike (before it got run over by a car or something and is a little bent up now.) I guess Austin finally decided it was time to ride a bike, so he went out on his own, got on that bike and road it. Both Anaïs and Austin learned how to ride bikes by themselves. I always thought the parent is suppposed to help them, but they just make the decision one day, get on that bike, and go. Next thing you know, they come in the house and say, "I can ride a bike." And sure enough, they can!
It is just like when we took our vacation to Corsica last summer. Xavier and I were sweating it out on the beach, when we heard Austin suddenly yelling from the Mediterranean all excited, "I can swim! I can swim!" We looked down, and surely Austin was swimming!  We whooped and cheered him on.
Nicolas has swum for the first time this weekend. He just started putting his head underwater and actually starting swimming underwater. I'm totally amazed. They kind of come onto it on their own. He still remains in the shallow end, but it's starting.
 Adventure Land:
Took the kids to Adventure Land at the Mall after much badgering to eat at the Mall. I finally took the kids on a little outing to McDonalds. The restaurant overlooks Adventureland, so I was obligated to allow the kids to explore this place I've attempted to hide. They were totally excited! 
Made the mistake of wearing too short of a skirt to Adventureland that day. While I was attempting to understand how it works and how to buy the magic plastic card, Austin and Nicolas were fighting over grabbing onto my body like little bands of velcro. Then, Nicolas had the bright idea of trying to access my body from behind by lifting my skirt up way over his head.
I got very angry because I think I mooned everyone behind me and swatted him on the head before I yanked him out. He started to cry from this and I chewed him out a bit, couldn't help myself. Then, when I finished buying the card and was attempting to walk away, both boys went for a grab on either side of my legs, wrapped their arms around them and almost tackled me to the ground. I got upset again, stopped and had to physically peel each boy, one by one, off my body. 
We played games and went on rides. Kids loved it! Easy to blow a lot of money here. You receive a "credit card" with whatever amount you put on. Once the credit card runs dry, I explain to the kids the bank is closed, no more rides. The kids never seem to believe me and think that there is endless fun to be had and that this little plastic card has an infinite amount of cash on it. Sorry kids, that's not how it works. So, I had to drag the boys out of there.
Ice Skating:
Promised to take the badgering monkeys ice skating today at Morocco Mall, probably the only ice rink in Maroc. They are very excited. Nico is a little nervous, never been ice skating before. I made a point to say, "no we are NOT going to adventure land." The ice rink is inside Adventureland, so temptation is high, especially for Austin. They've been badgering me to ice skate since I promised them Tuesday. I know 2 days is so long to wait when you're 9, 7 and 4.
Mom's Mishap At The Ice Rink:
It was Nicolas's first time ice skating ever. He was terrified at first, then loved it. Holding both his hands almost broke my back since he's so short. I had to literally squat and skate the whole time. Broke out into a good sweat. Then decided to break free and skate a little on my own. Mind you, I was the ONLY adult skating. I decided to pick up a little speed. Went around a corner, the ice was REALLY cut up, but decided to do front cross-overs anyway, because I'm, you know, an arrogant, over confident show off.  Hit an edge, oops, lost balance for a split second, then.....TOE PICK. 
Next thing I know, I'm air born, an expletive more than likely flew out of my mouth as I landed palms down on the ice thinking "oh God, I'm going to slice up my hands."  I could almost see the ice turning red from the blood that was going to run from my palms.  So, I managed to rotate my body, hitting every part of it on the ice until I could make it onto my back, upon which I finished sliding across the ice.  Mind you, I'm wearing a tank top and jeans, but figured I'd rather slice up my shoulder and back than my palms. 
I managed to cut my elbow and bang up my hip. Was more embarrassed than injured. Have NEVER bit it that bad on the ice in my life. My palms were red and sore, but fine. However, I noticed ketchup on my jeans...I mean, oops, that's not ketchup. Only noticed my elbow much, much later. A pretty gash, but nothing to write home about. Still, had an awesome time ice skating with the kids.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Assault 8/2012

Ok, there is something seriously f-ed up here. I think EVERY female I know, or almost every female has been assaulted at least once. Most get their purses snatched. Some, who carry their purses across their bodies end up getting dragged down the street by the guy riding a moped who snags her purse from behind.

They go by on mopeds or bicycles and snatch purses or necklaces. Some get straight up robbed. Ramadan seems to be a season of higher crime, especially towards the end. I'm always nervous, but am more so now than before. One woman got attacked on the beach while running alone by two men, one carrying a 6 inch blade at her. Totally mental. In the end, she got neither robbed nor raped, she screamed so much, they walked away. One got attacked outside her home while she was unloading the car filled with groceries. Najat got attacked while she left a house from work, a guy put a knife to her throat and he walked away with her cell phone and her week's wages. Another woman got attacked yesterday while loading her car with groceries. Two men attacked her. She fought both of them off. She put pictures of her ordeal on facebook and is all bloody, but the girl fought. I give her kudos. I doubt they had a knife, but it must have been on the main road. Am totally confused as to why no one helped her??

All of my survival instincts kick in here in Maroc that I had in Chicago. Basically it feels like you're living in the middle of a Chicago slum, so how would you act if you're living in Cabrini Green?

I always look to see who is around me. I keep my purse off the street side shoulder. If I'm walking with a friend side by side, I keep my purse on the shoulder between us. I just went out and bought a 15$ plastic knockoff purse. Problem isn't the purse, it's the papers and cards inside the purse. I'm always worried about getting things snatched. Locals have warned me that if I'm on my cell phone in the car, I need to keep it on the ear that is away from the window, because someone could come by, reach in and snatch it out of my hand. Same goes for purses and packages, keep items on the floor behind you.

Never go running with money, a purse, or something valuable to steel. I always run with nothing on me, just in case. I always run either inside Marina Blanca where there will not be a problem, or on the street where there are lots and lots of people. I have more danger getting hit by a taxi or car suddenly pulling off onto the shoulder or a moped than anything else. I never go out alone where there are no people, forget about going out at night. Don't walk down a street that is dark. If you don't get attacked by a man, you might get attacked by a pack of wild dogs. I'm more afraid of the dogs currently than men.

I have yet to have a problem, but I think that has something to do with luck. A woman got her purse snatched last week while she was walking with her husband by a guy, albeit, not a very bright one who was on foot. Her husband is fit and was wearing trainers. Together they yelled and ran after the guy. He chucked the purse on the ground and continued running off. He broke the strap of her purse as he tried to steal it.

I understand why women wear djelabas. They have open pockets, so you put your belongings on the inside. I might just go out and snag my own, makes it kind of hard to get to my purse though if it's shoved inside a Djelaba, oh well. I guess the key is to look poor, but who wants to go around all covered up looking poor? Not I. I just want to be myself and not have any issues. Most people are very, very nice and friendly. It's just scary when something like this happens. You know it will happen, it's just a matter of time. I figured I'm safer since I live in Dar Bouazza, still I NEVER feel safe here either. I totally stick out. I just try to remain where there are people and never walk off onto a side road. I also don't wear too many nice things, not that I have so much jewelery anyway. Still I'd be pissed if someone stole my wedding band or my engagement ring. Those are sentimental. Let's hope nothing will ever happen.

Ramadan 8/2012

Oh, the dreaded and mysterious Ramadan.

Business hours get messed up, restaurants close during the day. Starbucks isn't open at the mall anymore. My life is over, or is it?....

Ramadan is time of the great fast. No drinking or eating while the sun is up. People's clocks get reversed.

Breakfast starts at Ftour, this year, around 7:45 PM when the sun goes down.

People start with dates, sweets, croissants, tsimmon (moroccan pancakes) and harera (moroccan tomato soup), coffee or tea.

Then around 11:30 PM/Midnight comes the main meal (pastilla), tajine, couscous, whatever.

Then around 3:30 AM before the morning prayer that starts maybe around 3:45 AM, not sure about the exact time, some people get up to have a last light breakfast of fruit and yogurt.

Ftour is a time for family and friends to get together and share a large meal. Eat and party (without alcohol). Honestly, I think it's awesome. The atmosphere at night at Marina Blanca is fantastic. Kids stay up and play until 11 PM, everyone is outside eating and drinking and having a grand old time without adults getting trashed. I think it's really great! Restaurants open up again late at night to serve people Ftour and dinner. It's kind of cool.

Most restaurants are closed during the day. I rarely eat out anyway. I don't find the food in restaurants to be that good. I prefer what Najat cooks at home. The restaurants are all the same anyway, for me brochette, tajine, salad and harera. You can only take so much of that. I haven't had really good steak since I have the impression the meat is sketchy. I won't eat anything unless it's fully cooked. No one seems to know how to butcher meat. They just lob off a hunk of the cow hanging from the hook. No point asking for filet mignon. I'm not a big fan of lamb either. For me, the taste is a little too strong.

I tried to observe Ramadan the first day. I was deathly hungry by the end of the day. I like to run in the early evening and if I have no food, then I have no gas. It didn't quite work for me. Out of respect for others, I don't eat or drink in public. Honestly, it's so hot, I'm not that hungry during the day anyway. Ramadan is more an issue for expats at work. The restaurants are all closed so they have to bring their food with them and eat quietly away from others. It's ok. We're in week 2 already.

It doesn't feel that much different from France. In the month of August, often times small stores and bakeries will just close down completely for the holiday. It annoyed me when I was living in Paris in 1998-1999 because I was still on American mentality that commerce should never stop. Now, I think that is a silly and foolish attitude. Life happens, everyone needs a vacation sometimes...Enjoy.