Friday, February 17, 2012

Car Accidents

Yes, with traffic rules that are gray and taxis weaving all over the road, the occasional bump 'em up is inevitable. I have been driving for maybe 1 month now and I have been bear witness to at least 6 car accidents.

I have either seen the accidents as they occur or have arrived shortly afterward. The following are a list of accidents in no particular order nor are they listed by their gravity.

1 A truck smashed together ever so gently its side with a fellow car
2 a car gently rear ending a bus
3 yesterday, I was in the lane on the left of a truck rear ending a smaller truck. Minor damage, yet both stopped and probably blocked traffic since most accidents seem to take place in the center lane.
4 today a big smash 'em up, 2 cars perfectly front ended each other. They were smashed up pretty bad. By the angle, it looked like they were both attempting to turn, sadly they turned directly into each other. Due to the amount of damage, I assume they were both driving aggressively.
5 an ambulance was already there. The bicycle was on the ground in front of a car on the in-town kind of highway in the center of the road where 2 highways merge. Both are 2 lane roads travelling btw 60-80 km/hr (about 35-45 mph). The car was stopped, traffic was really backed up and there were large spots of blood on the ground.
6 2 ladies standing there in the middle of the road, blocking traffic. They rear-ended each other. There was absolutely no damage, yet they were blocking traffic and fussing.

Near Accidents
Most of my time is spent on the N1 (la route nationale 1) connecting Dar Bouazza with Casablanca. It passes right in front of Xavier's work at Sidi Maarif and the kid's school in Oasis. Both near accidents happened on the N1.

1 I was in traffic at a light. There is an area where a lot of people live just on the edge of Casablanca. There are lots of fruit stands, kind of like a permanent souk (market). There are always trucks stopping, people crossing everywhere, bicycles, motorbikes, taxis swerving everywhere, then suddenly screaching to a halt in the right hand lane to pick up a potential customer. There is also the occasional lost sheep wandering across the 6 lane road. The donkey or horse pulling a cart and the occasional man pushing the cart on foot into oncoming traffic.

On this particular day, I guess school was out. People stand on the median btw the 2 roads, then sort of out of the blue, make a sudden, ill timed, mad dash across to the other side. Most of the time, this happens mid street (ie NOT at the crosswalk, though it would probably more dangerous at the intersection) and most often during a green light while traffic is already cruising along. the median consists of 2 very high cement curbs with a lower middle made of dirt. I was in the left lane nearest the median. These 2 highschool girls were standing in the median. The light was green, I was already driving maybe 20-25 km ph when these 2 girls decided to suddenly dash out to cross the street. My car was the first to be crossed. 1 girl made it, the other girl clipped her toe and fell sprawled out on the ground right in front of my car. I hit the brakes and waited. Her friend helped her up and they stood back in the median. I waited for them to be safe, before proceeding. I think she's lucky I wasn't an agressive driver. Had a white taxi been in my place, she may have been run over.

For the record, it is my opinion that the white taxis are the worst drivers I've ever encountered in my life (outside of Brownsville, TX.) Sometimes, I want to roll down the window and yell at them.

2 Motorbike
Yes I have seen everything carried on a motorbike. Entire families. Mom, dad and kid. Infants. I have seen objects, impressive anyone can put that on a bike and still drive. I've seen people carry 10 kilo bags of flour maybe?? btw their legs. I saw I guy with boxes up his back and a large one held precariously btw his legs. His feet weren't on the pedals because his legs were being used to hold the large box into place. On this particular day it was a father and young boy behind him. Mind you very, very few people ever wear helmets on a motorbike, NEVER a child. I had just passed around this man when he started driving his bike all squiggly and then the bike fell down and he and the boy just toppled off into the street. N1 is a big road where people drive 60-80 km/hr. They weren't driving too fast and both seemed to be ok. No one hit them thank goodness and people around them helped.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Morrocco details...

Roads: Beware of potholes. I've never driven under more stressful situations. The roads have potholes and sometimes speed bumps that are both intentional and unintentional. Either way, beware of both. On the right side of the road are people walking, bicycles, motorcycles with the entire family on them (it's amazing how many people you can fit on a motorcycle, mom, dad and a toddler), carts being drawn by horses or donkeys filled with people and produce, taxis pulling over to pick up or drop off people, cars pulling over for not sure what reason? Sometimes cars and motorcycles drive on the shoulder along the road against traffic (slightly nerve racking). There is also the issue of lanes. In most countries two lanes on the road means two cars side by side. In Casablanca, that could mean as much as four. People drive all over the place. I almost got squished today between a bus and a truck. I decided to brake, just in case there wasn't enough room and it was a good idea. I'm thinking most collisions happen here not front end, but rather side by side.

Driving: Driving into Casablanca this afternoon to get the kids, I saw a dog eating the carcass of a dead dog lying on the side of the road.

Things that annoy me: people can't pick a lane. They wander into my lane even though their lane is clear of cars, they just wander over so I can't get by them. I feel like pulling up next to them, honk, roll down my window, and yell "stay in your own lane!"

Honking: On the same road as the cannibal dog, there was a large bus behind, next to and sometimes in front of me. He is what I call a "happy honker". Traffic isn't moving, yet he continues to honk his horn, beep, beep, beep. Look, a parked cart on the side of the road; beep, beep, beep. Uh oh, I merged in front of him; beep, beep, beep (this time at me I presume.) Oh look, now he's crossed the two lane road and is partially driving into oncoming traffic all the while; beep, beep, beep at the caravan of cars in front of him to drive faster and forcing all of the on coming traffic to squeeze 2 rows of cars into 1 1/2 lanes. Still beep, beep, beep. I think he honked his horn all the way to his destination (wherever that is??)

I find that most often trucks are "happy honkers." Someone told me, well, welcome to Casa.

Lanes: What are those white stripes on the road supposed to mean?? Today as I was driving my husband to work since my new job has become the family chauffeur before the child drop off at school, I had to merge. There are two lanes presumebly drawn on the road. I counted the number of lanes that were created to merge onto the 2 lane overpass; 5. I was in lane 4, naughty me. I intentionally stayed in the left lane with the idea of cutting ahead of everyone else. Lane 5 had the same idea, but more brazen. Lane 5 was blocking everyone who wanted to stay on the main road and NOT merge onto the overpass. Mentally I had to give them kudos for their ballsiness (though I still didn't let any of them cut in front of me.) I figured they should wait until the very last moment before they could merge. No one merges early.

Turning: Sometimes there is no break in the traffic in order to make a left hand turn, therefore you have to get a little nuts and a little creative. Besides if you don't, the people behind you will start honking their horns. You have to pull out into fiercly oncoming traffic, say a little prayer that they will slow down and not cream you, then once you've fully cut everyone else off, hope for an open space and then jump right in.

At the kids school, I have to make a left hand turn to get to the light. Unfortunately both two lanes of the treet were already backed up to the next block. The car in front of me was both creative and brazen and just created a third lane by driving on the wrong side of the road and cutting everyone else off who was in line and got right up to the front. So, like any nice, kind, road polite person; I followed. I felt a little guilty, but made it out by the first light. Surprisingly, no one honked at me.

Crossing the road in Casa on foot: SUICIDE. Yep, made that mistake today. No, I didn't get hit by a car, but was very scared. I just wanted to check out the tennis club near the kids school to see if I can sign them up. There are no pedestrian cross walk lights in Casa and there are NO breaks between traffic. I crossed not when the traffic was coming, but when people were turning. I had to run and dodge four cars and two mopeds all of whom didn't seem keen on slowing down. I got honked at. At the other half of the road, I waited for the red light, but just because the light turns red, doesn't necessarily mean drivers are going to stop. Often, people burn red lights.

Morroccan mint tea: delicious

Avacado Juice: that's right, freshly squeezed avacado juice. Didn't know one could juice an avocado. It is delicious! It's like a liquid meal in itself.

Yesterday at the last minute X. invited a new arrival family to the house. I asked N. if she could prepare a meal for 4 adults and 6 kids. She went all out and prepared some hors d'oeurves. She then created a beautifully layered salad on a giant plate she borrowed from a friend (since we have a skeleton kitchen here). Then she made a French tajine of mutton and mushrooms and crème fraîche with a side of rice. Mmmm...delicious. I was very proud.

Pet Shelters: As far as I know, do not exist here. All animals roam free together. Then, if there is a rabies outbreak, the army comes and shoots all the wild dogs. Afterwards, the dogs slowly repopulate. If you want a puppy? Just go out and grab one. They're all over the place. If you think about it, it's not a bad life. At least here, dogs are free to be dogs. They run, find a mate, have some puppies. All in all, I think they are able to live a full life. In the US, we murder animals on a regular basis to keep the population down. It's just done in a clean, systematic way in the shelters, not necessarily better. Most animals are spayed and neutered so they never have a chance to live a full animal life, of course then they don't have to die young or experience other terrible things.

Horsebackriding: X and I decided to go for a tour of the Sahara in March for 1 week on horseback through the local horseback riding club. Of course I've never had 1 class before and have limited horse riding experience to nose to tail trail walking in a large group. This would be interesting. So I've had 3 lessons so far.

Lesson 1: we had to learn to post, ,that is bounce up and down in the saddle while the horse trots. The instructor yelled at me to lift my bum off the saddle, but I swear for the life of me I couldn't. He said, "stand up!" I'm thinking if I do that, I'm going straight off the front of the horse. Still after lots of painful bouncing and a very sore bum, I was finally able to sort of post by the end of the hour.

Lesson 2: The trainer and I went out on the trail. It was great! More trotting, more posting and he said now we're going to gallop. I said we're going to whatop? He said, "do you have confidence in me?" I said, "Yes, I have confidence in you, but the question is do I have confidence in myself?" I'm looking down at the rocks and boulders lining the trail and thinking if I fall off, I'm going to break something. So, he promised we'd do a slow gallop. He said you do not post in gallop, you remain in the saddle. I said, how? He said you squeeze your legs together very tightly. I'm thinking, I have no inner thigh muscles, this is going to be interesting. So, I galloped. I got partly bounced all over the place, then for a brief moment I was able to ride with the horse and remain in the saddle. It was pretty cool, really hard, but cool. Everyone said horseback riding is a sport. I always thought you just kind of sit there, I mean how hard can it be? Well, I assure you, from always too overconfident me, it IS hard.

Lesson 3: more trotting and galloping. Good time. I'm still sore. Legs are quite sore, but hopefully that will go away with some time.

Morrocco News...Finally

Where do I start?

Architecture: a bunker from WWII crossed with downtown Nice

Trash: everywhere outside, in fields, on sidewalks, on the sides of the road, in the middle of the road, in yards, piles and piles of rubbish, on the beach, in the ocean, etc.

Roads: some are cement, many are dirt, hard packed dirt. Not sure what happens when it rains, the center of Dar Bouazza where people walk is a dirt road filled with dirt, rocks, rubbish, poverty and cats

Animals: packs of wild dogs roam free, cats everywhere. Animals graze everywhere, empty lots, beach, the sides of the road, and they graze in the trash littered fields. Roads are shared with chickens, sheep, and cows, and carts being drawn by either horses or donkeys.

Once I was driving and I had to stop because a sheep had wandered into the middle of the road. Another time I was driving, I had to stop because I farmer was walking a train of cows right in the center of the street.

Language: a little French, mostly Morroccan Arabic, communication is hard. I ask people if they speak French. A lot of people don't understand me. Many people are illiterate. We interviewed a young woman who couldn't speak French real well to write her name for us in French and she couldn't. A lot of signs and foods are written only in arabic. I've learned just a few words in arabic. I have a hard time learning to count because the words are so long. There are phonemes that don't exist in English which makes some sounds very hard to pronounce. I have a hard time pronouncing the sound R in just about any language (French and Arabic).

People: are very nice, lots of good service, lots of people working in restaurants or on the side of the road to help you park or wash your car. Lots of cops (not sure that's a good thing). I have the feeling they would be out to exploit expats and expect to be bribed. I haven't been pulled over by the police yet, but it is inevitable. It would help if I could speak a little arabic, just to show respect.

Housekeeper: The best thing that's happened to us so far. I figured out pretty quickly that things work through word of mouth here. (bouche à l'oreille). We moved into a house in a large closed in housing development where most rich Morroccans keep their second vacation homes. Therefore it is quite dead in the winter, but very beautiful and quiet. We did very well choosing our house and where we live. I went to the park with my kids and met all the nannies. Everyone has a nanny and a housekeeper who cleans and cooks for the family. I was looking for someone to replace myself (ie nanny, cook, housekeeper, shopper, etc) and asked everyone in the park if they knew anyone. Everyone has a sister or a friend who could come and work for us. I collected a few phone numbers. My only stipulation is that she has to speak French so I can communicate with her. I then had a knock on my door from a lovely woman named Zora. She said the guard told her that we're looking for someone. She herself is already engaged by a family, but her sister is working and looking for a full-time job. I said, well bring her over. I met her the next day and she spoke French. I told her what I wanted and she said that's no problem. She asked for a fair amount of money, but I thought, what the hek. If I pay a nanny and a housekeeper separately, it would probably cost me more. So, I had Xavier meet her, I liked her and he agreed to hire her. Her name is Najat and she is the greatest thing that has happened to our family since we arrived in Morrocco. She explains the prices to me, tells me where to shop, where not to shop, how things work. I had to take a taxi here and asked if she would come with me so I can learn how to do it. Silly, I know but not obvious. She said it should cost 7 drm (70 cents) to go to Casa and 10 drm (1€) to come back per person. This is the white taxi. Once in Casa, you take the red taxi which runs by a clock like in the states so you can't get ripped off. She said never ask for the price up front because I will get ripped off because I'm not local. She said there are 2 prices, 1 for local, 1 for French. I obviously fall into the French category. So far though, I don't feel like I've been ripped off much. Most people I've delt with have been honest.

Schools: NIGHTMARE

There are 2 « American » schools here in Casa. One I heard is very, very, very bad. I've only heard negative things about it. The other is the lesser of 2 evils (called GWA). We based everything on GWA. We moved near GWA hoping we'd find lots of expats in the area (we heard there are lots of expats in Dar Bouazza). I had been in contact with GWA since Oct letting them know we were coming. I got all the papers together and we arrived during the winter break. They were closed so I had to wait until school started to begin the « enrollment process .» I called over the holiday and left numerous voicemails. Never got a response. I then called monday and they told me to come in maybe that day, maybe tues. I can't remember. The attitude of their admissions staff was not interested and not motivated. They just didn't care that my kids were not in school. There is one French woman who is in charge of admissions, she's nice, but totally slow. She wouldn't move her ass to do anything. I called everyday and said what do we need to do to get the kids into school? I figured it would take 2 days at best. All they needed from me was money to pay the admissions and some photos and the kids to get tested. They said that the teachers are sick so there is no one to test my kids. I said why don't they just start school and you can test them during the week when the teachers come back. She said GWA doesn't work like that. I waited until the following Tues to get Anais tested. Austin was supposed to get tested the same day but we all got sick so he couldn't. Wed was a holiday so no one reveiwed the test. Austin got tested Friday, still no response regarding Anais' test. Now 2 weeks have gone by, while admissions twiddles their thumbs and no one tells me anything, except they kept using words like « IF your child gets in. » There is one other Morroccan woman in admissions who helps the French woman. She is nice, but a total waste of human space. I have NEVER whitnessed a more useless human being in my life, and incompetent. She stupidly said to me once, « well you know, the 2nd semester doesn't start until Feb 6, so your kids might not be able to start until then. We don't like kids starting in the middle of the semester. » I said « if this is the case, you need to tell people BEFORE they move to Morrocco. I would have stayed in France. » I was so pissed that night, I couldn't sleep.

At this point I realised there is a problem. I was so pissed with the admissions staff and their overwhelming incompetency, that I called the elementary education and told them their admissions staff is totally incompetent and that I am no longer going to deal with them. Is there anyone in this school who is competent? Do you have any idea what it takes for me to tell someone they are incompetent? I am not a person prone to emotions or exaggeration. If I say someone is incompetent, it's because they are. Not a good foot to start off on.

Monday comes, I received an e-mail. The American school after great deliberation has decided to reject my children. They are not welcome to the school. GWA has a native English population of 20%. They said my kids scored way too low academically to be accepted into the school. My son did poorly on reading and maths and they think Anais has a learning disorder, dyslexia, whatever. They said her reading is high 1st grade, low 2nd grade level and her maths is poor. They said they do not have the ressources to take care of her. I said, who does? Where am I going to go? I was so pissed!! I understand my daughter has a problem. I understand I need to find a professional in English who can solve this problem. I need to go to either England or US to have my daughter properly tested and get her on track.

GWA to be clear is NOT an American school. It is a school that caters to those who pay for its existence, Rich Morroccans. They say they follow an American cursus, but that is only a sales pitch for the Morroccans who pay money to get into the school. Xavier thinks they were expecting to be bribed. I don't know. I don't care. My kids aren't going there. The school in Manosque has kindly agreed to take my kids back. We have one last option here. There is a brand new school called International School of Morrocco run by an American and her husband. She used to work at CAS and something happened where she got fed up, left and started her own school. Currently they only have a kindergarten so our kids would be the only ones at this school for their age. Not sure how that will work. The kids are getting tested right now as I write this and then the owner will give us a proposal. We came here Monday and they said they couldn't help us because they are only a kindergarten for now, but hope to grow. We said in that case, we have to keep looking for other options. We are also looking into the Lycée Français, but I think Anais will get reemed in that system.

EVERY SINGLE other expat had the same horrific nightmares regarding schools. There was another expat who waited 1,5 months with his kids NOT going to school, only for the school to deny his children entry at the end. He was so pissed, he took his family, left his job and the country. I have now learned how to take control. I have an appt today at CAS anyway and told them up front the negative things I've heard about CAS and what happened to us at GWA. I told them I am completely enraged at what happened and that I'm coming back to France. I said you have one week to test my kids. She said that's impossible. I said then they will not be tested. I'm NOT keeping them out of school any longer for these kinds of things. She said she understands. I said I will go back to France, put the kids back in school. I will do all the necessary bull shit paper work in France and then have everyone line up the testing at the same time and come back for that. I am so pissed about the nonchalant lazy points of view regarding children's education in this country. I told GWA, you are an American school run by Americans. I expect you to be able to ACTUALLY run things the way Americans do. They said the problem is Morrocco. The country resists them. I've heard about that. It's the same problem for Xavier at work. Nothing works, nothing functions. It is very bizarre. From what I've seen locally, things have run very, very well here for me with the locals. Especially since I have Najat who knows everyone and who watches out for us. She is absolutely wonderful! We are so blessed to have her on our side!

All Expats told us they went though the same things with the schools. They waited forever to get into the school. The schools jerked them around. Their kids were poorly treated in the schools. They themselves were poorly treated. The schools cater to the local Morroccan population, which is normal since there aren't enough expats to keep the school afloat. Therefore schools are Morroccan run. It feels like a collossal joke. I don't think the education is even that good. Najat told me I was too nice, that I should have been a real bitch and yelled at people. She said when people are nice they get treated like shit in Morrocco. This is new to me. I did get angry and was about the level of rude that I get. But yelling straight up is not my style. I don't like yelling at people. In my culture, yelling at someone is showing that I have no intelligence and or emotional control. It looks pretty bad, at least that's how I see things. I just have to take control now and run the show. I was in a weak position at GWA, I've learned now. That is never going to happen again. A lot of people are leaving after 6 months because they are fed up with the situation in Morrocco and fed up with the school situation. We are worried about our kids. We want to keep the family together and are not sure what to do. However, when I signed onto this project, I didn't sign on to teach my kids home schooling and that seems to be where I'm headed. I'd rather come back to France. Socially, homeschooling isn't healthy for anyone.

It is hard because I never had any problems in school. I went to a great public school. Teachers were good, kids were bright. School for me was never an issue. I wasn't the brightest, which always annoyed me, but I wasn't the dumbest either. Everyone was bright. I just didn't have any learning issues, reading issues, math issues. I just didn't have any issues period. I guess I just assumed my kids would be like me. I had an incredibly stable childhood, which probably really helped. We've put our kids through tremendous stress and it's not getting any better. The int'l school in Manosque is properly accredited, which makes all the difference. That's hard to find in these parts, which makes it scary for the kids when we move onto the next place. I plan to come back sunday if nothing works out here and I will keep trying from France, slowly, at my own rhythm and in control.

This is my first month of experience in Morrocco. I keep forgetting how hard it is to be an expat. It already helps that I speak French. I cannot imagine how hard it would be if I couldn't communicate at all. And I have Najat who can translate for me and help explain the culture to me. It makes all the difference in the world. It's like having my own reliable, personal, capable guide to Morrocco. In that sense I'm very lucky.

My experience so far really is ok. It's just the school situation that has given me much stress, but like I said, we're learning quickly and I suppose adapting. Adaptation is really an acquired skill. I suppose you get better at it the more you do it.

I hope all of you stay well. If any of you do think about following to Morrocco. Please beware of the schools. Do it slowly during vacation if possible so you don't get stuck like the rest of us. Or prepare well in advance for homeschooling so you don't have pressure to get the school crap done. But definitely do ALL the papers for ALL the schools in advance because it is so much to do and really like a bad joke.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

Phone, Bank card, Ladder Nov-Dec 2011

Shortly after my last blog lambasting the phone company and bank, I got things sorted out. The phone just started working finally. It took about 3 weeks total that I went without an internet phone, ie free telephone calls to my family in the states and to my husband in Morrocco.

The bank is slightly worse. Like all diligent, careful people, I wrote my code down. The bank asked me if I wrote down my code. Of course. Then she said, did you write it down correctly? Yeah, duh. She asked if I still have the record of my code that the bank sent to me. I've learned that in France, keep ALL your papers, you never know. So, I went looking for my code in my file assuming I chucked it and voila! I found it. I took it out and compared it to the code I'd written down and whoops. I wrote down the wrong code. The problems more or less originated with myself.

So, all that being resolved brings me to thanksgiving...

We had our traditional potluck on Dec 3 during a weekend that Xavier would be home. I really wanted to invite EVERYONE I liked. That added up to about 100+ people. I tried hard to find a venu that could hold us. In the end I couldn't find anything available and or that could seat that many people, so I resigned to keeping the numbers down to the amount of people I could conceivably fit into my house. This time we did a little more picnic style, so people could sit on the sofa and chairs away from the table. It worked out fine.

In my image of a great party, I wanted to utilise the 30m² terrace, but in order to do that, I would need to enclose it. So, I went shopping for tarp. When the time came to put the tarp up, it proved to be difficult. The tarp I bought was mislabled and way too small. The highest height to attach is about 2.5 meters. I am 1.6 meters tall to give you an idea. I had to climb up the ladder to highest height in order to reach the wood beam to attach the tarp. It was windy outside and I kept thinking I'm going to fall off this ladder and get myself killed. Xavier left at 3:30 to get his hair cut. People were due to technically arrive at 4.

At 3:40, I shifted my weight on the ladder and as I did so, the ladder flew out from under me taking my feet along with it sideways. I was up about 1.5 meters high and thought, this is going to be bad. I landed very, very hard on my lower back (coccix). The terrace is tile and I had nothing to protect my fall, no coat on since it was relatively warm outside. My hand hit the step and luckily my head just missed the step.

Anyway, there I was laying on my back, outside on the tile in December feeling like an idiot and in extreme pain. My body made a loud noise when it hit the ground. The pain radiating from my back was very, very great. I lost all feeling the my fingertips and looked at my hand. In the impact my nail had lobbed off a nice chunk of my finger. I looked at that and thought, I'm glad I can't feel anything because when I get feeling back, that's going to hurt.

My friend Barb was in town from Texas and was home with me at the time, thank goodness. I was laying there in shock. I checked to see if I could move my fingers and that was ok. I was thinking, ok I'm going to have to call myself an ambulance and go to the hospital, question is, when? I've got guests showing up technically in 20 minutes. I can't leave Barb here alone. She's in the middle of making her hors'ouevres, she isn't ready yet either, she doesn't have time to deal with this. Then I realized, crap, I can't do anything now. I can't finish getting everything ready, I can't work and I can't use my left hand at all.

Anais was outside so I told her to go get Barb. She came out and we ascertained that I could move my body. I crawled inside and stood up, so that was ok. At least I knew the ambulance was out of the picture. I decided to relax and wait for Xavier to get home. I shoved the icepack down the back of my pants. People came on french time, roughly 1 hr late, so that bought me some healing time. When people did show up, I felt terrible because I had to ask them to work to finish setting up the house for the party. I wasn't able to lift anything.

I called our friend who was coming to the party anyway who is a doctor and told him that I broke my coccix and maybe also my wrist, but I wasn't sure about my wrist, it was swelling and changing colors. So, I spent the night trading the icepack off between shoving it down the back of my pants and my wrist. A friend of ours is a nurse and I asked her if she wouldn't mind looking at my bottom to assess the damage. I don't think there was any visible damage, just a lot of pain.

Well, we had a good time anyway in spite of the accident. I wasn't of any real use, which really annoyed me. My friend offerred to call off the party and take me to the ER. Call off a party? No. Everyone cooked and everyone's here, it's alright I'll go to the hospital later. Our friend picked up a wrist brace and looked at my wrist for me, he said it might be broken, but not requiring immediate attention and that the brace is as good as anyone can do anyway. He had a contact at the hospital and could get me in and through the system in one go, so it would be better than blowing 4 hrs at the ER for nothing. I said fair enough. He said you can't do much for a tailbone anyway. It didn't feel like it broke in half or anything, but it did feel broken.

The problem is all this took place on Sat. On monday both Xavier and Barb were leaving. I thought, crap, I can't lift anything or use my left hand at all and my right hand was severely damaged due to my finger. It was really hurting. So, I decided I hoped I would heal a little before they left. It was pretty rough. I couldn't sweep the floor or do the dishes, so I just let everything sit for awhile and get dirty. I went to the hospital monday after everyone left and got x-rays of my body. My wrist is not broken, but I did a nice big fracture of my coccix. The dr said it would take about 1.5 months to heal. My bottom is healing faster than my wrist. It's been about 1 month, I'm now taking the wrist brace off, but there is still a visible bruise on it.

In the meantime, I was living alone in France. A single mom with no family, working part time and broken and having to prepare a large move to another country. A little insane. Sometimes, I thought what the hek am I doing? My husband was able to come home every other weekend, but the weekend of the 3rd would be his last weekend home.

Luckily I am blessed to be surrounded by a group of amazing and wonderful international women in France. They all banded together to help me. A few friends came over and helped me go through all our stuff that we've collected over the past 10 yrs and helped me unload. We gave carloads away to charity and threw the other trash out. Our neighbor has been a very great help. He has dumped all the big stuff for us, like our very old and broken sofa from TX.

So, all went well. We finally received an emergency last minute passport for Nicolas so we could fly to Casablanca and meet Xavier for Christmas. Together we found a nice furnished house to rent in a beautiful resort like place. The house is smaller than other homes for the same price, but we get to live in a beautiful residence with pools, playground, beach and lots and lots of other people and consequently lots of kids for ours to hopefully make some friends. We have also met some expats, but so far no one has kids the same age as ours. Most people have very, very young children or their children are grown.

More on Morrocco in the next blog.

Cheers,

Friday, October 28, 2011

French Observations October 2011

Gypsy:

One day not too long ago, I was driving from Gréoux to Manosque. I was running late to pick up the kids from school. At the top of the hill btw the 2 towns on the plateau was a man pulled over on the side of the road with his car. He was running about on the street flagging people down for help. Most people drove passed him. At first he looked Indian, so I though he might be a poor Indian ITER employee who has car problems and needs help and being foreign, doesn't know what to do. I pulled over and he came up to me, he spoke poor French, so I spoke to him in English. His English was ok, but not great. He said he is from Turkey and he has his family in the car and he's out of gas. My instinct was to call the police for help for him, but he asked me for money to get gas.

This was the first red flag. But, I know that if he came from Turkey, maybe his bank card doesn't work and maybe he couldn't find the gas station in Manosque because they aren't obvious and easy to find. So, I gave him 20€. He offered to give me his gold necklace or his gold ring. I said no, just take the money and I left. His whole family inside his car was thanking me.

I was feeling pretty good about myself. Like I'm a good samaritan who helped another person in need until....................

2 days later when I saw the same man, on the same side of the road, at the same time of day, doing exactly the same thing. I was pissed. He was parked on the opposite side of the road and I couldn't make out his license plate number. I debated whether or not I should call the police. After I got the kids and came back, I was hoping he would still be there and I could get a better look at his license plate and perhaps ask for my money back, but he was already gone. I've kept a look out since, but have never seen him again.

I heard he scammed another one of my friends in a different area of town, same story, same gimmick. As I was infuriated at the man who cried wolf, I told my neighbor and without going into details, she said so he offered to give you a silver necklace or other jewelery item in return? Uh hm. She said, he's a gypsy. NEVER give them any money. I've learned my lesson. It turns you a little callous, which is not a good thing.

Phone Company:

We went to our phone company called Orange on Oct 13 to change our contract because we were being severly overcharged. We have an internet phone and a landline as well. We had a bill for the internet phone (internet, satellite included) for over 100€, then a separate phone bill just for the landline through France Telecom for 38€. Xavier was pissed, so we decided to stop the landline. Then our internet phone stopped working. This means I can no longer call people for free especially the US. Today is Oct 28, 3 phone calls later to Orange, still no phone. Everytime I called Orange they said it was because our new contract wasn't finished being processed and therefore there is nothing they can do until it's finished. IF our phone still doesn't work by Oct 28, which we ALL know will certainly be the case, then I'm supposed to call back and then they will actually begin resolving the problem. So, today I called yet again and explained the situation. They said they don't know what the problem is, but they will call me back on Tuesday Nov 1. I said "are you actually going to do anything between now and tues?" They said they think the problem is from their hardware someplace, or maybe my phone cable, or maybe my phone jack in the wall. They really don't know. If they cannot solve it, then on Tues they will explain it to me, then put me on a list for sending out a technician, you know like a week later to resolve the problem. I will be going at least 1 full month without a phone. I will try to negotiate not paying the full bill since I haven't had full service, though I know that in France, that will be an exercise in futility. I'll let you know at what date, I will actually receive the service I pay for.

One more thing, when we changed our contract, our new contract comes with something useless but costly called 3G and Gigamail. We want neither. The guy representing Orange signing us up is somehow NOT able to NOT sign us up for these options. If we want to "Delete" them, then I have to call Orange myself. Now, I DID call Orange and was able to delete gigamail after about 1 excruciating hour on the phone, however, they were not able to delete 3G. You see, it is NOT their department, and they cannot transfer me. So, as polite and as seemingly excellent service as they offer, I will have to call back the main line and ask for commercial service to get rid of 3G. And by the way, EVERY time I call my own phone company for anything, I pay per minute to resolve my own phone issues. Now, that's what I call EXCELLENT customer service!

The Bank:

Now that we have established the wonderful efficiency of French phone companies, let us expound on the BANK EXPERIENCE.

I bounced a check, well 3 checks to be exact. Whoops. I wasn't watching my account closely, it is my fault. 2 were to the canteen at the kids school. I wrote those checks in June. They bounced in July, then all banking hell broke lose. Overnight, ALL my cards and checks froze. I could no longer access anything. I have 2 banks. 1 in Manosque near me, 1 in Aix. I only bounced checks at the bank in Manosque, yet somehow EVERY bank I own in France went into blackout.

Now being checks to the school, the school closes during the summer. By the time we figured out which checks bounced, mind you, I called my bank numerous times and even physically went in and asked the simple question "which checks bounced?" The answer from the banker always was "I don't know." Surprisingly, that answer just isn't much help. If they are able to freeze my account, you'd think they'd be able to do a little research to find where the problem originated.

So, my husband being good and thorough, went through our mail to hunt down the letters from the banks and make sense of everything. The school being a school closes down in the summer, so I had to wait until Sept for everyone to come back to work to resolve the problem. Now we are 2 mos without access to my account. Xavier had to buy the gas and pay the groceries. We ran out of checks and our bank refused to send us more since I was in a bank blackout. Finally I got from my bank that I need to physically get the checks back and bring them along with a receipt to the bank. Now I have 2 days off mon, thurs. The bank is closed on mon. This doesn't leave much opportunity to resolve things.

I finally got the checks from my school. They said that I then needed to bring them cash. How? I asked when I cannot use a cash machine? So I went back to the bank on wed morning when I was in Manosque every wed and asked for the cash. Brought the cash to the school on Thurs. Once I procured the checks and the receipt I waited again until I could go to the bank. Everything was supposed to be in order. The 3rd check was to a grocery store in Lyon and after a few phone calls, Xavier negotiated with them to pass the check on through a second time.

On Wed, my bank now had ALL the information they should need to get the issue resolved. However, NEVER trust a french bank. So, the following Wed, I went back to see what was "happening" since I was still sitting pretty in blackout. They said they were still missing a check. I said no you have the check. They argued with me. I said look for it, you have it, there is nothing I can do. She looked and oh my goodness, the check was just sitting there in the pile. It never got processed. 1 week wasted.

The following Wed, I go back to the bank and said "so, what's going on?" Why can I not yet use my cards? She said it is now at the bank of france, it will take about 15 days to process so you should be good by the first week of oct. Remember, I'm in blackout, I have no checks, I cannot pay bills and I have to come to Manosque to the bank physically to take cash out. They are not open on mon, sun and are closed during lunch hours and basically any time someone is NOT at work. They are open Sat morning for about 2 hrs. DO I really want to drive 1/2 hr there and back to get cash?? That's an awful lot of gas to waste, esp when a full take costs about 75€. I said how can 15 days take me all the way into Oct? Do you mean 15 business days? As in 3 weeks? "uh, yes ma'am." Then you should say 3 weeks.

So, every couple of days I called the bank. Same response, we don't know. We cannot contact the Bank of France, I just have to wait. "Can I call the bank of france myself?" "No, ma'am, you cannot call them, they don't have a phone number, no one can call them." Every Wed, I went into the bank and asked about the progress. No ma'am nothing's changed yet. Finally, after 3 weeks, I went into the bank yet again and they said, Oh yeah, it looks like the bank of france lifted the blackout, but it was LCL who was freezing my accounts. I said, "so, can you take off the freeze?" They did, then we said we want to close our account.

Xavier has been trying to close the account for over 1 year. He sent certified letters, we came into the bank. This last reason is oh, yeah, once we got a letter returned to us that we sent to you, so you need to bring us proof of your address. We need a bill from the electric company that is less than 3 months old. In the meantime, they are charging us like 30€ in charges every month per account. Xavier was so pissed. I finally made an appointment with our banker for Thurs, you know the one day I don't work, the bank is open, and I don't have children with me. Our banker, Mme Yde said yes, she closed the account of my husband and transferred everything into my account. His account had 0€.

Then, I had to go back to the bank to make sure everything was in order for my account because I wanted to close it as soon as the blackout was lifted. Xavier was no longer working at ITER at this point and was going to go to Morocco soon, so I wanted to bring him with me, just in case, you know, so if he needed to, he could "go French" at someone. Mind you, we showed up there in the morning. We asked about Xavier's account and they said, no it's not closed, and showed that there was money in it.
Xavier was infurious! We demanded to speak to Mme Yde and that we are closing both accounts right now, today and want paper proof of the close. At that particular moment, Mme Yde was present and had NO ONE in her office, but in order to talk to her, we must make an appointment to come back in the afternoon. Xavier wanted it to be clear. We asked what must we bring to close our accounts?

The answer was the usual ID, proof of address, bank transfer paper to the new bank, electric or water bill that is less than 3 mos old or rental agreement, and this was new, they wanted us to bring in ALL of our unused checks. We said "are you joking??? The account is closed, what will a check do??" She said it will put us back into blackout lockdown again and will be harder and more difficult to resolve.

We came back at 15:00 spoke to Mme Yde. She looked nervous. Xavier tried to remain calm and NOT go French at her. She closed the account and gave us proof of it. I now have a file going for LCL Bank because I still don't trust them. I understand now why Xavier was so keen on keeping French papers for years and years. In France, you absolutely have too! Never trust anyone.

In the meantime, my other bank in Aix. Apparently, I was still in blackout lockdown with them even though my bank account at LCL is closed. I called and they said it's because it takes 8-10 EXTRA days for the bank of france to lift the other accounts. That puts me in blackout for over 1 month. My extra problem is back in July, just before lockdown, I forgot my bank code and put in the wrong one 3X. Now I'm in blackout and lockdown from the Bank of France, but in special lockdown #2 for putting in the wrong code. The bank said I need to come and get a new card and give them the old card.

Remember they are located in Aix, I live 1 hr north of Aix. The toll road is 6€ to get to Aix, parking in Aix is an extra 4€ min, gas will be at least a quarter of a tank, about 15-20€. Total cost out of pocket to make a quick 1/2 day journey to Aix to swap bank cards is about 30€. Now, after some negotiation with my new bank, they offered to mail me the card with the assurance that I will be able to use my old code.

Remember bank of france lockout on HSBC last 4 weeks, after ban has been lifted and phone call to bank was made, it takes an extra week to receive new card. I had written down my old code, so am sure of the code being correct. Banker said in order to activate my card, I must buy something. I received my new card with great joy on Oct 24, the day Xavier was supposed to leave. I then went to a place and tried to spend some money on the card. What happened?? Card did NOT go through, it said I used a false code. I reluctantly tried a second time after much insistance from store owner.

Remember, 3 wrong codes keyed and card gets locked out again and will have to call bank for a new card and wait yet a minimum of 1 week. Xavier is leaving in 2 days. 2nd time, code came up false. I stopped and paid cash. I called the bank and she insisted that my code is correct. She said I should go to a cash machine and try it. I said "no." I asked her to please mail me my code. Xavier said my code should change and that the banker is wrong. So, I should be receiving my new code on Tues. Let's hope there won't be something wrong. I just might have to make that trip down to Aix afterall.

Xavier is now gone and I still don't have a functionning bank card. I at least have received checks, so I can buy groceries, etc. Let's hope for the best. Worse comes to worse, I might be able to cash a check at another bank if I need cash. Who knows??

Those are some thoughts and experiences I thought I'd like to share. Xavier said Casablanca is sort of like as he put it "hell." He said it's all the negative of Marseille, to the nth power. He said it is the opposite of Germany. It is dirty, polluted and totally chaotic. He said there is no real public transportation system and driving it is hell. There are donkeys on the street. Casablanca is an ugly dump. He also said that Rabat is not 1 hr away, but 2 hrs away, so we can forget about moving there. His job is south of Casablanca, so I said why don't we just live south. He said he almost got killed crossing the road in Californie. He said he has never feared as much for his life as trying to walk Casablanca. Which means, forget parking in Casablanca. Hmm, a bit of a problem.

He found a colleague who lives south in some sort of house/compound. His colleague will be moving soon and his house will be available. Apparently the house comes with a butler. Yes, that's right, the house comes with a butler. How the heck can a house come with a butler??? I'm thinking that's probably out of our price range. I'll have to go and see for myself.

Explanation: To go French at someone:

Verb (used both with and without object)

1. To yell at a person in a truly direct manner. Why the cuss are you unable to do what I'm asking?!

2. To lose all forms of sophisticated composure and let out ALL of your negative emotions in the exact way your are feeling them at that exact given moment. You are the most incompetent group of cuss cuss cusses I have ever met! How can you live with yourself?

3. Will probably include verbal expression of extreme dissatisfaction with a specific person and or the institution they represent. How many times do I have to come here to resolve this? It's as though I have to do your job for you? This is totally unacceptable! (followed by fist pounding on individual's desk)

4. Is usually in reaction to extreme incompetency.


Wednesday, October 5, 2011

News Barcelona, Corsica, Morocco October 2011

Lots of news since the last blog:

Barcelona - Xavier and I went to Barcelona, Spain for work for Xavier. I drove to Lyon to drop the kids off with Yvette and then hit the road with just Xavier for 3 days in Barcelona. He had a seminar for one day and we hung out the other 2 days. It was a great chance to put to use my 1 trimester of college Spanish. I really wanted to see all things Gaudi (the best architect for my personal taste up to date). Ever since a Korean friend of mine went to Barcelona and brought back photographs of Gaudi architecture and pictures from Park Guell, I've been decided to go too. I had Barcelona on my list of things to see before I die, especially this cool beautiful Gaudi bench that wraps around a seating area in Park Guell.

Xavier and I enjoyed a relaxing stroll around Barcelona. I found the city to be pleasant and spacious, though I wouldn't want to live in the center. No privacy, everyone can see into your yard or your house. It is way too crowded in terms of shared living space. We found Starbucks, so had a nice break there and just drank Chi Tea, which I haven't enjoyed since 2009 in Munich. We read books and spent the day on the beach playing in the waves. I had a really nice time. When I had the day to myself on Monday, I was on the long stubborn journey to Park Guell which was extremely difficult to find. The tour book looked easy, but on foot it was impossible. I ended up asking everyone for directions off the street in Spanish. No one spoke English, except for these nice Indian men working in a Kiosk. With a little French, I was able to understand enough. I didn't bother trying Catalan. I figured they would at least try to speak to me in Spanish, but I speak so little, it doesn't really matter anyway. Images from Park Guell are at the following link.
http://www.google.fr/search?q=parc+guell&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=I52&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=G0qNTrGhDKa00QXMgsk_&ved=0CDkQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=665

After 1 hr of meandering uphill and asking directions from every passerbyer, I finally made it to ParK Guell. It was very cool. I took photos, and will attemt to post them? There is no one interesting in the photos, just a little beautiful architecture. Gaudi looks a lot like the Palais du facteur Cheval in France. The Palace of the postman Cheval. I think he existed about the same time as Gaudi and wonder if Cheval was influenced by Gaudi or if they were influenced by the same things common to their time period. It is very cool to visit as well. I think it is near the area of la Drome. The kids loved running through it. There are lots of little passages and windows from which to peek.
http://www.facteurcheval.com/

There were other things I wanted to see in Barcelona regarding Gaudi, but I didn't have enough time. We saw the outside of the Cathredral designed by Gaudi called Sagrada Familia. http://www.google.fr/search?q=sagrada+familia&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=bpN&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&biw=1366&bih=665&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=TEuNToubMumx0AWuzY0d&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CBEQ_AUoAQ

We also visited the old city center which is the Barri Gothic Quarter.
http://www.google.fr/search?q=barri+%2B+gothic&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=SXi&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=6kuNTuyRMaiw0AXEorgm&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&ved=0CBAQ_AUoAQ&biw=1366&bih=665


Barcelona is supposed to be about 5 hrs without traffic from Gréoux. It took us 8 because it was in high tourist season.

Corsica: In mid August we took the kids to Toulon, climbed on Corsica Ferries with the car and slept overnight during our boat ride to Ajaccio, Corsica in the Mediterranean. A few years back we took the same boat company from Livorno Italy or some place like that to Sardinia before Nicolas was born. The kids loved being on the boat, but this time neither of them could remember it. It was like they were experiencing it again for the first time.
http://www.corsica-ferries.fr/

Corsica, how to some up in a few words??? Hot, Hot, Hot, sunny, wasp infestation, mafia, tourist rip off, beautiful nature, beautiful landscape, beautiful beaches, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
We camped for 2 weeks with the kids. It was about 40 celcius (95-100 farenheit) every day from about 9 AM onwards. It was hotter at the campsite than at the beach. The wasps are around you from dawn till dusk. The first day we arrived, we made the horrid mistake of attempting to cook hamburgers. We were attacked by a swarm of wasps. I litterally had my hamburger on a fork and was walking briskly to keep ahead of the wasps, since I was being trailed. We never cooked during the daylight again. There were always about 5 wasps around us as we ate breakfast, as I cleaned dishes, etc. They would fly into my body and bounce off me, fly into my face, land on everyone. Miraculously, no one was stung during the entire 2 weeks!! We brought a picnic salad with us to the beach everyday. We realized we forgot to pack tupperware, so there we were all 5 of us spooning salad collectively out of my cooking casserole pot and spooning the food directly into our mouths. I don't think our children ever ate as healthy as during those 2 weeks off of different kinds of salads. They normally don't like lentil salad, etc, but suddenly when hunger strikes and there is nothing else, they can't stop saying how good it is!! We couldn't eat chocolate because it was so hot, it would melt into a river.

After 1 week of camping and swimming in the Mediterranean and playing on the beach, snorkeling, etc, the kids had enough and started asking to go home. They didn't want to see another beach. We also wanted to go home. One night our blow up mattress broke so we deflated within the hour. I didn't sleep real well that night. We had to buy a new smaller air mattress since we couldn't fix the old one. One day we went to Quick for lunch, just to escape the wasps and have AC for a change. The kids were very happy until we said it was time to go to the beach again. That's when all the moaning started.

It's funny at any other time the kids always ask to go to the beach. 1 week of excessive heat, excessive wasps and beach, and the kids have had enough. One day towards the end, we made the mistake of going to one of the local mafia run restaurants on the beach. A few signs of shadiness: 1. it was almost always completely devoid of customers 2. there were the same 2 men sitting at a table at the entrance all day every day during the work week, reading magazines, smoking and drinking beer. My question is, how do they live? What do they do? Even mafia can't make much money off 5 customers a day. Xavier said he had coffee there and he saw some local people get a great meal so he wanted to try it.

How does one spot local mafia? Well.....I'm just going to give you an educated guess at the following description. When we were there, we saw 2 families. 2 fat older tubby men each with very, very young, as in half their age kind of skanky looking wives. Every single person was covered in these gaudy thick gold chain necklaces, including the 2 yr old baby. To increase the confusion in new money, poor taste, the skanky young wives wore, bsides their bikinis showing off their stretch marks, large diamonds wedged inside their belly buttons. Given Corsica is isolated and seemingly poor, and since it has no industry outside of 3 months of tourism and some fishing, and everything costs 2X as much as the already overpriced mainland, it makes you question???

My one and only meal at this restaurant by the way which was part of the "lunch special" and costed a whopping 20€ was called grilled chicken. Imagine what you would envision as a 20€ meal of grilled chicken for a moment....... This was my meal: 1 overcooked thigh from an anorexic chicken (A chicken thigh, as you may know is the CHEAPEST part of the chicken to buy) and about 20 french fries still swimming in grease, yes actually counted them, 20. There was more plate than food. I was really pissed but wasn't sure what to do. Other restaurant options were limited, kids were hungry and this retaurant had the ONLY toilet on the beach, which I'd been using for free for the entire 2 weeks!

During our 2 weeks, a weatlhy french entrepreneuer was shot dead by a sniper on his own boat. At least one person on the island has skills I suppose, be it as nothing more than a hired sharp shooter.

We met some nice people, hiked up to one of the waterfalls inland, canoed on the Mediterranean, and snorkeled. I took some photos of the kids. It was an interesting vacation and I don't need to go back. However, I must say Corsica is a truly, truly beautiful place. I have never seen a more beautiful place. If you have a choice between Corsica and Sardinia, go to Corsica. Sardinia has terrible beaches. Corsica beaches are large and pretty. Just remember to bring your own toilet. Corsica is a part of France and therefore toilets are few and far between and no one will share theirs willingly. Most beaches don't have toilets and therefore if you want to use one in a restaurant, then you have to buy something. At least the beaches and parking are for free. Otherwise, we'd be REALLY broke after out trip. A family of 5 at Quick (McDonalds) was 40€ ($55).

http://www.google.fr/search?q=corsica&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=Kn4&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=yWONTtGBMYeZhQfAnbAH&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&ved=0CCgQ_AUoAQ&biw=1366&bih=665

Morocco: OK if you can still stomach reading, the REALLY BIG news. Xavier has accepted a new job in Morocco. He leaves October 24. He will come back every other weekend. It will be hard to be without him. I was very worried and panicked to be on my own in France. I was worried about stupid things like if my car breaks down, if I can't get the computer to work right, or if I get sick. I have friends, but my stand by back up will no longer be here. My computer techy husband will be gone and I will be forced to deal with the PC alone not to mention the French Administration. I'm feeling better now though.

The goal is for us to move to Morocco for the next school year, only if things go well for Xavier there, only if the region seems stable enough, if it's safe and if he thinks we will be happy. He has to find a nice school for the kids. It will probably be in only English. Which makes coming back here difficult, since the kids will then lose at least 1 yr in French. We'll see. So far, Xavier's contract is for 2 yrs. We have 3 2 week breaks coming up, X-mas, Feb, spring. I just found out my sister's getting married, so we will fly back to Chicago during the summer. I will have to stay behing in Gréoux to get the move into order. School here ends July 5. It will take maybe 2 weeks of packing and camping here and moving our things into storage and shipping the rest to Morocco. I think I will see if I can give the kids to Yvette during that time. We want to sell the cars. I will lease a small crappy car there. I don't want the hassle of shipping my car. Then we can be free to go wherever we want afterwards.

Xavier's contract is for 2 yrs. He won't really know the situation or the needs until he gets on the spot. He is going to be head of project management for a phosophate mine or something. I'm not really sure what he will be doing. The job is in and near Casablanca. The Sahara dessert is in the south. I've always wanted to take a camel ride through the Sahara!! That will be first on my list of things to experience. I will need to learn Arabic. I would like to speak and read some Arabic. I've always been very curious about that. I also need to work while I'm there. It is very important for my mental and emotional balance. I had depression since I stopped working and during the past 10 yrs have slowly reflected and figured out the specific balance I need in my life in order to be happy. I'm not sure how it is for others, but I've learned that I need 1. constant intellectual stimulation 2. feeling of positive production (meaningful work, not JUST work) 3. family 4. lots and lots of socialisation 5. being busy (also sport) 6. accomplishment in some form, or working towards new goals 7. travel. When I moved to Dresden, I was totally deprived of 1,2,4,5 and 6. I was completely depressed. When I went to school the first month, I was totally happy and could deal much better with being in a new place because I had so much socialisation and mental stimulation, but once that month ended and we couldn't afford for me to continue, I fell into a horrific depression. Sometimes it takes us to have difficult situations in order to learn more about ourselves. I've also learned I am an Expat no matter where I am and that's ok. I don't need to fit into the local culture because I will ALWAYS be an outsider, which is ok too. The people I will most likely become friends with are expats and locals who have travelled and who have also experienced expatriation. They also feel out of place with the other locals. It doesn't matter to get involved with the locals and or to be accepted by the locals. You will have a hard time becomming friends with the locals, but have a much faster time becomming acquainted with the expats because the expats are all in the same boat. They are ALL away from their families and have no back up so you become each other's back up. It is like have a large transient extended family constantly surrounding you. It is very good and important.

We have an appt with the US consulate Oct 12 to get our passports in order. Hopefully we will be able to get our passports by x-mas. Xavier is going to Paris this weekend. Then next weekend is passports in Marseille, then the following weekend is the first weekend in the fall break and goodbye to xavier. Being away from my husband isn't such a bad thing since it will force me to stand on my own a bit more and become more independent, which is never a bad thing. The goal is to slowly introduce the children to Morocco in a positive manner so we can move there next year. 9 mos alone is 1 thing. 2 yrs alone is a lifestyle. I want my family to be together and I think this is a wonderful way to visit Africa. I have always been curious about Morocco. I have always wanted to go to Morocco and have recently wanted to visit Africa. Of course Morocco is just the Maghreb. While we are there, I would like to extend his contract if possible so we can stay at least 2 school years there and take the time to visit the rest of Africa like Kenya or something. I've always wanted to climb Mount Kilimanjaro since I learned about it in college. It has been on my list of things to do before I die.

I'll keep you posted. Today is the first day I'm actually home since school started Sept 5. Craziness.

Mount Kilimanjaro, Tanzania Africa
http://www.google.fr/search?q=mount+kilimanjaro&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=ptO&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=VluNTtZ7g7qEB_rmnfoP&ved=0CEwQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=665

Casablanca, Morocco
http://www.google.fr/search?q=mount+kilimanjaro&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=ptO&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=VluNTtZ7g7qEB_rmnfoP&ved=0CEwQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=665#hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=9uO&rls=org.mozilla:fr%3Aofficial&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=casablanca+maroc&pbx=1&oq=casablanca&aq=1&aqi=g10&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=85182l87563l0l95435l10l10l0l4l4l1l724l2399l2-2.1.2.0.1l6l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=5d2108b9fb05369&biw=1366&bih=665

By the way, I don't anticipate Casablanca to be pretty or anything. I figure it will look like a run down version of Marseille. At least they speak French. I think it goes like this. The common blue collar majority will speak Arabic (that means all shopping, food, etc). The university educated people will speak both Arabic and French. The higher educated people (doctors, higher degrees, Moroccan expats) will speak Arabic, French, and English. Either way, I think it is important that I learn Arabic. I started writing my first novel called Isabelle in July. I have to hurry and get that finished because I want the heroine in my next novel to speak Arabic. But, I cannot start that until I finish this first one. I have to make it a habit to write EVERY night after the kids go to bed in order to get my novel finished, otherwise it will just sit there and not get done!!!

Friday, March 25, 2011

March 2011

Apparently I haven't written since November!! Yikes!

It's nearing registration time again at the International School in Manosque for the kids for next year. We'll see how that pans out for Nicolas. We are as usual worried. This time we are worried he may not get into the school next year. I think we'll have to go through the usual paperwork and just find out.

Work is going great for me. I am very happy teaching at the school. I have a good team that I work with, lots of nice and talented people. I couldn't be happier. I think we all work well together. I work only in the maternelle this year so I can only account for us. When I work, we have all the foreign language teachers together on the same day, so it is very varied. We do music and sing songs in English, French, German, Italien, Chinese, and Japanese. It is a lot of fun, though difficult for me outside of German and French.

Working part-time is really great. I feel like a mommy with a hobby. I didn't like staying home full-time. It was boring AND really stressful. It is more fun going to work. At least the art projects I do with the kids I can test on my own kids at home at first. That seems to work really well. I can bring in their examples to show the kids the end results. My kids enjoy doing art projects and cooking.

Sitting here there is so much to say, yet not sure what to tell you. I don't want to bore anyone to tears!

I was grocery shopping the other day in LIDL with all 3 kids, which I usually try to avoid because they are so unruly. Anyway, I end up with a cart full of items which annoys anyone behind me because there is no such thing as an "express lane" in France. I always let anyone with a few items to bump ahead of me in line. There were 2 older men (grandpa aged) behind me and started talking a few lines to me in English. We ended up chatting a bit, then they starting helping me unload the cart which was really nice, then they also started helping me load it back up after the cashier checked out the items. We don't have anyone bagging groceries for you in France and you don't have time or the space to bag a cart full of groceries yourself, so you have to throw the items back in the cart as fast as possible so the people waiting behind you won't get too angry, then once you get to your car or home, you can bag them. I had other Americans new to France complain because they try to bag their groceries on the spot, which is normal because that's how we do things in the states. However, they feel the pressure of the other patrons waiting behind them and try to work as fast as possible while holding up the line. Meanwhile the cashier will just sit there and stare at you and watch you work, but won't offer to help. This comes across as very strange for an American, because part of the cashier's job in the states is bagging groceries. In America, we find it odd when a customer is bagging their own groceries. It's a big no no in the US.

My first job was bagging groceries in the states. I was 15. I was already tired of baby-sitting and wanted to get a "real job." Who knew that after taxes and union fees, I would earn so much more babysitting!! As a teenager you want to go out with your friends and not babysit children on Friday and Saturday nights. I liked my job. I worked with immigrants who could barely speak English and with mentally handicapped people. I don't know of any other country that would allow mentally handicapped people work. I think it is very important for them to hold down a job. It gives them stimulation and independence. During my time working in highschool at the grocery store, I learned about a social constraint that I call the "foodchain mentality." About 80% of the customers who came into our grocery store were nice, polite people. They would talk to you, say hi, etc. However, there is that unfortunate other 20% who subscribe to the "foodchain mentality." These are the people who rate your, their and everyone's value based on 2 apparent objectives. 1 The amount of education you have. 2 The amount of money you make and/or are subjectively valued. If one of the said individuals comes across another who is subjectively deemed their equal or superier, then they will treat that person with respect. However, if they come across an individual who appears "inferior" to themselves (most immigrants will automatically fall into this category especially if they cannot speak English), then the "foodchain mentality" person will allow himself free licensce to treat this person differentially and without respect. The key commonality between all of my experiences with the "foodchain mentality" person is that they undoubtedly ALWAYS thought of themselves as quite high up on the foodchain, like a lion or a shark. As a teenager who was employed as a lowly bagger and then later promoted to cashier, you can only guess where I fell on the foodchain. My youth didn't always exclude me from this disrespect. I found that in general the "foodchain mentality" people only remained with the educated upper middle class. Men were more likely to be of this group than women. When a woman does subscribe to the "foodchain mentality," she can alomost be worse than the men.

This doesn't mean that all middle upper class people are rude. Like I said, the remaining 80% are always very nice and polite.

I have to say I am really glad I had this experience. I am glad to work with mentally handicapped and with immigrants. It was very important to learn about openness and acceptance. And more importantly, I always vowed that no matter what I do with my life, no matter how high I achieve, I will NEVER be a "foodchain mentality" person. I will always be one of the nice and polite customers. When I did go to work in large companies later, I made it a point to talk to everyone, especially the housekeeping, though I couldn't really speak much Spanish. It is important to treat everyone with mutual respect because at the end of the day everyone is the same. People fall in love, have families, and work. I don't see why anyone should think they have a free license to treat anyone different or lower than themselves.