Lots of news since the last blog:
Barcelona - Xavier and I went to Barcelona, Spain for work for Xavier. I drove to Lyon to drop the kids off with Yvette and then hit the road with just Xavier for 3 days in Barcelona. He had a seminar for one day and we hung out the other 2 days. It was a great chance to put to use my 1 trimester of college Spanish. I really wanted to see all things Gaudi (the best architect for my personal taste up to date). Ever since a Korean friend of mine went to Barcelona and brought back photographs of Gaudi architecture and pictures from Park Guell, I've been decided to go too. I had Barcelona on my list of things to see before I die, especially this cool beautiful Gaudi bench that wraps around a seating area in Park Guell.
Xavier and I enjoyed a relaxing stroll around Barcelona. I found the city to be pleasant and spacious, though I wouldn't want to live in the center. No privacy, everyone can see into your yard or your house. It is way too crowded in terms of shared living space. We found Starbucks, so had a nice break there and just drank Chi Tea, which I haven't enjoyed since 2009 in Munich. We read books and spent the day on the beach playing in the waves. I had a really nice time. When I had the day to myself on Monday, I was on the long stubborn journey to Park Guell which was extremely difficult to find. The tour book looked easy, but on foot it was impossible. I ended up asking everyone for directions off the street in Spanish. No one spoke English, except for these nice Indian men working in a Kiosk. With a little French, I was able to understand enough. I didn't bother trying Catalan. I figured they would at least try to speak to me in Spanish, but I speak so little, it doesn't really matter anyway. Images from Park Guell are at the following link.
http://www.google.fr/search?q=parc+guell&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=I52&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=G0qNTrGhDKa00QXMgsk_&ved=0CDkQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=665
After 1 hr of meandering uphill and asking directions from every passerbyer, I finally made it to ParK Guell. It was very cool. I took photos, and will attemt to post them? There is no one interesting in the photos, just a little beautiful architecture. Gaudi looks a lot like the Palais du facteur Cheval in France. The Palace of the postman Cheval. I think he existed about the same time as Gaudi and wonder if Cheval was influenced by Gaudi or if they were influenced by the same things common to their time period. It is very cool to visit as well. I think it is near the area of la Drome. The kids loved running through it. There are lots of little passages and windows from which to peek.
http://www.facteurcheval.com/
There were other things I wanted to see in Barcelona regarding Gaudi, but I didn't have enough time. We saw the outside of the Cathredral designed by Gaudi called Sagrada Familia. http://www.google.fr/search?q=sagrada+familia&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=bpN&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&biw=1366&bih=665&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=TEuNToubMumx0AWuzY0d&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&sqi=2&ved=0CBEQ_AUoAQ
We also visited the old city center which is the Barri Gothic Quarter.
http://www.google.fr/search?q=barri+%2B+gothic&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=SXi&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=6kuNTuyRMaiw0AXEorgm&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&ved=0CBAQ_AUoAQ&biw=1366&bih=665
Barcelona is supposed to be about 5 hrs without traffic from Gréoux. It took us 8 because it was in high tourist season.
Corsica: In mid August we took the kids to Toulon, climbed on Corsica Ferries with the car and slept overnight during our boat ride to Ajaccio, Corsica in the Mediterranean. A few years back we took the same boat company from Livorno Italy or some place like that to Sardinia before Nicolas was born. The kids loved being on the boat, but this time neither of them could remember it. It was like they were experiencing it again for the first time.
http://www.corsica-ferries.fr/
Corsica, how to some up in a few words??? Hot, Hot, Hot, sunny, wasp infestation, mafia, tourist rip off, beautiful nature, beautiful landscape, beautiful beaches, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
We camped for 2 weeks with the kids. It was about 40 celcius (95-100 farenheit) every day from about 9 AM onwards. It was hotter at the campsite than at the beach. The wasps are around you from dawn till dusk. The first day we arrived, we made the horrid mistake of attempting to cook hamburgers. We were attacked by a swarm of wasps. I litterally had my hamburger on a fork and was walking briskly to keep ahead of the wasps, since I was being trailed. We never cooked during the daylight again. There were always about 5 wasps around us as we ate breakfast, as I cleaned dishes, etc. They would fly into my body and bounce off me, fly into my face, land on everyone. Miraculously, no one was stung during the entire 2 weeks!! We brought a picnic salad with us to the beach everyday. We realized we forgot to pack tupperware, so there we were all 5 of us spooning salad collectively out of my cooking casserole pot and spooning the food directly into our mouths. I don't think our children ever ate as healthy as during those 2 weeks off of different kinds of salads. They normally don't like lentil salad, etc, but suddenly when hunger strikes and there is nothing else, they can't stop saying how good it is!! We couldn't eat chocolate because it was so hot, it would melt into a river.
After 1 week of camping and swimming in the Mediterranean and playing on the beach, snorkeling, etc, the kids had enough and started asking to go home. They didn't want to see another beach. We also wanted to go home. One night our blow up mattress broke so we deflated within the hour. I didn't sleep real well that night. We had to buy a new smaller air mattress since we couldn't fix the old one. One day we went to Quick for lunch, just to escape the wasps and have AC for a change. The kids were very happy until we said it was time to go to the beach again. That's when all the moaning started.
It's funny at any other time the kids always ask to go to the beach. 1 week of excessive heat, excessive wasps and beach, and the kids have had enough. One day towards the end, we made the mistake of going to one of the local mafia run restaurants on the beach. A few signs of shadiness: 1. it was almost always completely devoid of customers 2. there were the same 2 men sitting at a table at the entrance all day every day during the work week, reading magazines, smoking and drinking beer. My question is, how do they live? What do they do? Even mafia can't make much money off 5 customers a day. Xavier said he had coffee there and he saw some local people get a great meal so he wanted to try it.
How does one spot local mafia? Well.....I'm just going to give you an educated guess at the following description. When we were there, we saw 2 families. 2 fat older tubby men each with very, very young, as in half their age kind of skanky looking wives. Every single person was covered in these gaudy thick gold chain necklaces, including the 2 yr old baby. To increase the confusion in new money, poor taste, the skanky young wives wore, bsides their bikinis showing off their stretch marks, large diamonds wedged inside their belly buttons. Given Corsica is isolated and seemingly poor, and since it has no industry outside of 3 months of tourism and some fishing, and everything costs 2X as much as the already overpriced mainland, it makes you question???
My one and only meal at this restaurant by the way which was part of the "lunch special" and costed a whopping 20€ was called grilled chicken. Imagine what you would envision as a 20€ meal of grilled chicken for a moment....... This was my meal: 1 overcooked thigh from an anorexic chicken (A chicken thigh, as you may know is the CHEAPEST part of the chicken to buy) and about 20 french fries still swimming in grease, yes actually counted them, 20. There was more plate than food. I was really pissed but wasn't sure what to do. Other restaurant options were limited, kids were hungry and this retaurant had the ONLY toilet on the beach, which I'd been using for free for the entire 2 weeks!
During our 2 weeks, a weatlhy french entrepreneuer was shot dead by a sniper on his own boat. At least one person on the island has skills I suppose, be it as nothing more than a hired sharp shooter.
We met some nice people, hiked up to one of the waterfalls inland, canoed on the Mediterranean, and snorkeled. I took some photos of the kids. It was an interesting vacation and I don't need to go back. However, I must say Corsica is a truly, truly beautiful place. I have never seen a more beautiful place. If you have a choice between Corsica and Sardinia, go to Corsica. Sardinia has terrible beaches. Corsica beaches are large and pretty. Just remember to bring your own toilet. Corsica is a part of France and therefore toilets are few and far between and no one will share theirs willingly. Most beaches don't have toilets and therefore if you want to use one in a restaurant, then you have to buy something. At least the beaches and parking are for free. Otherwise, we'd be REALLY broke after out trip. A family of 5 at Quick (McDonalds) was 40€ ($55).
http://www.google.fr/search?q=corsica&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=Kn4&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&source=lnms&tbm=isch&ei=yWONTtGBMYeZhQfAnbAH&sa=X&oi=mode_link&ct=mode&cd=2&ved=0CCgQ_AUoAQ&biw=1366&bih=665
Morocco: OK if you can still stomach reading, the REALLY BIG news. Xavier has accepted a new job in Morocco. He leaves October 24. He will come back every other weekend. It will be hard to be without him. I was very worried and panicked to be on my own in France. I was worried about stupid things like if my car breaks down, if I can't get the computer to work right, or if I get sick. I have friends, but my stand by back up will no longer be here. My computer techy husband will be gone and I will be forced to deal with the PC alone not to mention the French Administration. I'm feeling better now though.
The goal is for us to move to Morocco for the next school year, only if things go well for Xavier there, only if the region seems stable enough, if it's safe and if he thinks we will be happy. He has to find a nice school for the kids. It will probably be in only English. Which makes coming back here difficult, since the kids will then lose at least 1 yr in French. We'll see. So far, Xavier's contract is for 2 yrs. We have 3 2 week breaks coming up, X-mas, Feb, spring. I just found out my sister's getting married, so we will fly back to Chicago during the summer. I will have to stay behing in Gréoux to get the move into order. School here ends July 5. It will take maybe 2 weeks of packing and camping here and moving our things into storage and shipping the rest to Morocco. I think I will see if I can give the kids to Yvette during that time. We want to sell the cars. I will lease a small crappy car there. I don't want the hassle of shipping my car. Then we can be free to go wherever we want afterwards.
Xavier's contract is for 2 yrs. He won't really know the situation or the needs until he gets on the spot. He is going to be head of project management for a phosophate mine or something. I'm not really sure what he will be doing. The job is in and near Casablanca. The Sahara dessert is in the south. I've always wanted to take a camel ride through the Sahara!! That will be first on my list of things to experience. I will need to learn Arabic. I would like to speak and read some Arabic. I've always been very curious about that. I also need to work while I'm there. It is very important for my mental and emotional balance. I had depression since I stopped working and during the past 10 yrs have slowly reflected and figured out the specific balance I need in my life in order to be happy. I'm not sure how it is for others, but I've learned that I need 1. constant intellectual stimulation 2. feeling of positive production (meaningful work, not JUST work) 3. family 4. lots and lots of socialisation 5. being busy (also sport) 6. accomplishment in some form, or working towards new goals 7. travel. When I moved to Dresden, I was totally deprived of 1,2,4,5 and 6. I was completely depressed. When I went to school the first month, I was totally happy and could deal much better with being in a new place because I had so much socialisation and mental stimulation, but once that month ended and we couldn't afford for me to continue, I fell into a horrific depression. Sometimes it takes us to have difficult situations in order to learn more about ourselves. I've also learned I am an Expat no matter where I am and that's ok. I don't need to fit into the local culture because I will ALWAYS be an outsider, which is ok too. The people I will most likely become friends with are expats and locals who have travelled and who have also experienced expatriation. They also feel out of place with the other locals. It doesn't matter to get involved with the locals and or to be accepted by the locals. You will have a hard time becomming friends with the locals, but have a much faster time becomming acquainted with the expats because the expats are all in the same boat. They are ALL away from their families and have no back up so you become each other's back up. It is like have a large transient extended family constantly surrounding you. It is very good and important.
We have an appt with the US consulate Oct 12 to get our passports in order. Hopefully we will be able to get our passports by x-mas. Xavier is going to Paris this weekend. Then next weekend is passports in Marseille, then the following weekend is the first weekend in the fall break and goodbye to xavier. Being away from my husband isn't such a bad thing since it will force me to stand on my own a bit more and become more independent, which is never a bad thing. The goal is to slowly introduce the children to Morocco in a positive manner so we can move there next year. 9 mos alone is 1 thing. 2 yrs alone is a lifestyle. I want my family to be together and I think this is a wonderful way to visit Africa. I have always been curious about Morocco. I have always wanted to go to Morocco and have recently wanted to visit Africa. Of course Morocco is just the Maghreb. While we are there, I would like to extend his contract if possible so we can stay at least 2 school years there and take the time to visit the rest of Africa like Kenya or something. I've always wanted to climb Mount Kilimanjaro since I learned about it in college. It has been on my list of things to do before I die.
I'll keep you posted. Today is the first day I'm actually home since school started Sept 5. Craziness.
Mount Kilimanjaro, Tanzania Africa
http://www.google.fr/search?q=mount+kilimanjaro&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=ptO&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=VluNTtZ7g7qEB_rmnfoP&ved=0CEwQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=665
Casablanca, Morocco
http://www.google.fr/search?q=mount+kilimanjaro&hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=ptO&rls=org.mozilla:fr:official&prmd=imvns&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=VluNTtZ7g7qEB_rmnfoP&ved=0CEwQsAQ&biw=1366&bih=665#hl=fr&client=firefox-a&hs=9uO&rls=org.mozilla:fr%3Aofficial&tbm=isch&sa=1&q=casablanca+maroc&pbx=1&oq=casablanca&aq=1&aqi=g10&aql=&gs_sm=e&gs_upl=85182l87563l0l95435l10l10l0l4l4l1l724l2399l2-2.1.2.0.1l6l0&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.,cf.osb&fp=5d2108b9fb05369&biw=1366&bih=665
By the way, I don't anticipate Casablanca to be pretty or anything. I figure it will look like a run down version of Marseille. At least they speak French. I think it goes like this. The common blue collar majority will speak Arabic (that means all shopping, food, etc). The university educated people will speak both Arabic and French. The higher educated people (doctors, higher degrees, Moroccan expats) will speak Arabic, French, and English. Either way, I think it is important that I learn Arabic. I started writing my first novel called Isabelle in July. I have to hurry and get that finished because I want the heroine in my next novel to speak Arabic. But, I cannot start that until I finish this first one. I have to make it a habit to write EVERY night after the kids go to bed in order to get my novel finished, otherwise it will just sit there and not get done!!!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
March 2011
Apparently I haven't written since November!! Yikes!
It's nearing registration time again at the International School in Manosque for the kids for next year. We'll see how that pans out for Nicolas. We are as usual worried. This time we are worried he may not get into the school next year. I think we'll have to go through the usual paperwork and just find out.
Work is going great for me. I am very happy teaching at the school. I have a good team that I work with, lots of nice and talented people. I couldn't be happier. I think we all work well together. I work only in the maternelle this year so I can only account for us. When I work, we have all the foreign language teachers together on the same day, so it is very varied. We do music and sing songs in English, French, German, Italien, Chinese, and Japanese. It is a lot of fun, though difficult for me outside of German and French.
Working part-time is really great. I feel like a mommy with a hobby. I didn't like staying home full-time. It was boring AND really stressful. It is more fun going to work. At least the art projects I do with the kids I can test on my own kids at home at first. That seems to work really well. I can bring in their examples to show the kids the end results. My kids enjoy doing art projects and cooking.
Sitting here there is so much to say, yet not sure what to tell you. I don't want to bore anyone to tears!
I was grocery shopping the other day in LIDL with all 3 kids, which I usually try to avoid because they are so unruly. Anyway, I end up with a cart full of items which annoys anyone behind me because there is no such thing as an "express lane" in France. I always let anyone with a few items to bump ahead of me in line. There were 2 older men (grandpa aged) behind me and started talking a few lines to me in English. We ended up chatting a bit, then they starting helping me unload the cart which was really nice, then they also started helping me load it back up after the cashier checked out the items. We don't have anyone bagging groceries for you in France and you don't have time or the space to bag a cart full of groceries yourself, so you have to throw the items back in the cart as fast as possible so the people waiting behind you won't get too angry, then once you get to your car or home, you can bag them. I had other Americans new to France complain because they try to bag their groceries on the spot, which is normal because that's how we do things in the states. However, they feel the pressure of the other patrons waiting behind them and try to work as fast as possible while holding up the line. Meanwhile the cashier will just sit there and stare at you and watch you work, but won't offer to help. This comes across as very strange for an American, because part of the cashier's job in the states is bagging groceries. In America, we find it odd when a customer is bagging their own groceries. It's a big no no in the US.
My first job was bagging groceries in the states. I was 15. I was already tired of baby-sitting and wanted to get a "real job." Who knew that after taxes and union fees, I would earn so much more babysitting!! As a teenager you want to go out with your friends and not babysit children on Friday and Saturday nights. I liked my job. I worked with immigrants who could barely speak English and with mentally handicapped people. I don't know of any other country that would allow mentally handicapped people work. I think it is very important for them to hold down a job. It gives them stimulation and independence. During my time working in highschool at the grocery store, I learned about a social constraint that I call the "foodchain mentality." About 80% of the customers who came into our grocery store were nice, polite people. They would talk to you, say hi, etc. However, there is that unfortunate other 20% who subscribe to the "foodchain mentality." These are the people who rate your, their and everyone's value based on 2 apparent objectives. 1 The amount of education you have. 2 The amount of money you make and/or are subjectively valued. If one of the said individuals comes across another who is subjectively deemed their equal or superier, then they will treat that person with respect. However, if they come across an individual who appears "inferior" to themselves (most immigrants will automatically fall into this category especially if they cannot speak English), then the "foodchain mentality" person will allow himself free licensce to treat this person differentially and without respect. The key commonality between all of my experiences with the "foodchain mentality" person is that they undoubtedly ALWAYS thought of themselves as quite high up on the foodchain, like a lion or a shark. As a teenager who was employed as a lowly bagger and then later promoted to cashier, you can only guess where I fell on the foodchain. My youth didn't always exclude me from this disrespect. I found that in general the "foodchain mentality" people only remained with the educated upper middle class. Men were more likely to be of this group than women. When a woman does subscribe to the "foodchain mentality," she can alomost be worse than the men.
This doesn't mean that all middle upper class people are rude. Like I said, the remaining 80% are always very nice and polite.
I have to say I am really glad I had this experience. I am glad to work with mentally handicapped and with immigrants. It was very important to learn about openness and acceptance. And more importantly, I always vowed that no matter what I do with my life, no matter how high I achieve, I will NEVER be a "foodchain mentality" person. I will always be one of the nice and polite customers. When I did go to work in large companies later, I made it a point to talk to everyone, especially the housekeeping, though I couldn't really speak much Spanish. It is important to treat everyone with mutual respect because at the end of the day everyone is the same. People fall in love, have families, and work. I don't see why anyone should think they have a free license to treat anyone different or lower than themselves.
It's nearing registration time again at the International School in Manosque for the kids for next year. We'll see how that pans out for Nicolas. We are as usual worried. This time we are worried he may not get into the school next year. I think we'll have to go through the usual paperwork and just find out.
Work is going great for me. I am very happy teaching at the school. I have a good team that I work with, lots of nice and talented people. I couldn't be happier. I think we all work well together. I work only in the maternelle this year so I can only account for us. When I work, we have all the foreign language teachers together on the same day, so it is very varied. We do music and sing songs in English, French, German, Italien, Chinese, and Japanese. It is a lot of fun, though difficult for me outside of German and French.
Working part-time is really great. I feel like a mommy with a hobby. I didn't like staying home full-time. It was boring AND really stressful. It is more fun going to work. At least the art projects I do with the kids I can test on my own kids at home at first. That seems to work really well. I can bring in their examples to show the kids the end results. My kids enjoy doing art projects and cooking.
Sitting here there is so much to say, yet not sure what to tell you. I don't want to bore anyone to tears!
I was grocery shopping the other day in LIDL with all 3 kids, which I usually try to avoid because they are so unruly. Anyway, I end up with a cart full of items which annoys anyone behind me because there is no such thing as an "express lane" in France. I always let anyone with a few items to bump ahead of me in line. There were 2 older men (grandpa aged) behind me and started talking a few lines to me in English. We ended up chatting a bit, then they starting helping me unload the cart which was really nice, then they also started helping me load it back up after the cashier checked out the items. We don't have anyone bagging groceries for you in France and you don't have time or the space to bag a cart full of groceries yourself, so you have to throw the items back in the cart as fast as possible so the people waiting behind you won't get too angry, then once you get to your car or home, you can bag them. I had other Americans new to France complain because they try to bag their groceries on the spot, which is normal because that's how we do things in the states. However, they feel the pressure of the other patrons waiting behind them and try to work as fast as possible while holding up the line. Meanwhile the cashier will just sit there and stare at you and watch you work, but won't offer to help. This comes across as very strange for an American, because part of the cashier's job in the states is bagging groceries. In America, we find it odd when a customer is bagging their own groceries. It's a big no no in the US.
My first job was bagging groceries in the states. I was 15. I was already tired of baby-sitting and wanted to get a "real job." Who knew that after taxes and union fees, I would earn so much more babysitting!! As a teenager you want to go out with your friends and not babysit children on Friday and Saturday nights. I liked my job. I worked with immigrants who could barely speak English and with mentally handicapped people. I don't know of any other country that would allow mentally handicapped people work. I think it is very important for them to hold down a job. It gives them stimulation and independence. During my time working in highschool at the grocery store, I learned about a social constraint that I call the "foodchain mentality." About 80% of the customers who came into our grocery store were nice, polite people. They would talk to you, say hi, etc. However, there is that unfortunate other 20% who subscribe to the "foodchain mentality." These are the people who rate your, their and everyone's value based on 2 apparent objectives. 1 The amount of education you have. 2 The amount of money you make and/or are subjectively valued. If one of the said individuals comes across another who is subjectively deemed their equal or superier, then they will treat that person with respect. However, if they come across an individual who appears "inferior" to themselves (most immigrants will automatically fall into this category especially if they cannot speak English), then the "foodchain mentality" person will allow himself free licensce to treat this person differentially and without respect. The key commonality between all of my experiences with the "foodchain mentality" person is that they undoubtedly ALWAYS thought of themselves as quite high up on the foodchain, like a lion or a shark. As a teenager who was employed as a lowly bagger and then later promoted to cashier, you can only guess where I fell on the foodchain. My youth didn't always exclude me from this disrespect. I found that in general the "foodchain mentality" people only remained with the educated upper middle class. Men were more likely to be of this group than women. When a woman does subscribe to the "foodchain mentality," she can alomost be worse than the men.
This doesn't mean that all middle upper class people are rude. Like I said, the remaining 80% are always very nice and polite.
I have to say I am really glad I had this experience. I am glad to work with mentally handicapped and with immigrants. It was very important to learn about openness and acceptance. And more importantly, I always vowed that no matter what I do with my life, no matter how high I achieve, I will NEVER be a "foodchain mentality" person. I will always be one of the nice and polite customers. When I did go to work in large companies later, I made it a point to talk to everyone, especially the housekeeping, though I couldn't really speak much Spanish. It is important to treat everyone with mutual respect because at the end of the day everyone is the same. People fall in love, have families, and work. I don't see why anyone should think they have a free license to treat anyone different or lower than themselves.
Friday, November 19, 2010
News November 2010
Hello all. I know it has been a long time since my last blog but that's because there isn't much news to share. So I'll just dive in....
Over the summer we lost one of our beloved cats, Rocky. We went to Lyon to visit Xaiver's mom and when we came back, Rocky wasn't here. We suspect he disappeard shortly after we left. I was very upset and stressed about his disappearance. The kids didn't seem to care much, only Anaïs has been sad and still talks about him. All of the kids first words was either cat or Rocky. Nicolas still calls Zoé, Rocky. For him all cats are called Rocky. In one moment of particular shocking callousness, Anaïs asked if we could trade up Zoé for a hamster. I said no. They want another cat since Zoé isn't particularly friendly to kids. Again, we said no. We're not ready to add another animal to take care of. I'd rather do something else.
Xavier got a work promotion to PVC I think, which means project manager of something. I don't really understand what he does, but he is very happy and really loves his job. His contract comes to end this time in Feb, so he'll have to wait and see if he can get it extended again. I am very happy for him. He joined a gym and works out regularly and still goes crewing and canoeing on the weekends at Lac d'Esperron. I joined the same gym this year and can only go 2 days a week that I have free of children, so it's not much, but it helps my back pain.
I received a job offer to work at the int'l school part-time (2 days a week) this year and it is really great! I teach ESL for pre-schoolers PS and MS (3-4 yr olds). It is a lot of fun. Teaching is truly the one job I've had that I really like.
Anaïs: did some pony riding over the toussaint break. She seemed to enjoy that alright. She's been asking to pony ride for a year now, so that went well. We'll see what we'll do for winter break. She is in CE1 (2nd grade). She seems happy. still sruggling to read in French and English. I worked with her over the summer just in English to help her with phonics and reading in general. I didn't push, I just wanted it to be fun. I also do soutien with her during my lunch breaks when I'm at school and I don't have meetings. She seems happy. I do soutien with her in English and maths. Her maths has greatly improved over the summer because we worked on that together as well. She desperately needs to do sport, so I have to find her something. Gréoux doesn't offer a whole lot of options. Sadly dance and gymnastice are not a part of them. She is limited to tennis and martial arts. We'll see. I don't consider pony riding as a sport, it's more of a bourgeois hobby.
Austin: in GS (kindergarden). He is learning his letters, though that seems to be coming slowly. He is fairly stubborn, but wants to work with me at night. There may be a bit of jealousy with Anaïs. So, we work a little on letters and numbers at night. I discovered recently that he can't recognize numbers beyond 5. So, we can work on that I suppose. He also needs sport, but I haven't signed him up yet. He is an out-doorsy boy and would love fishing and rock climbing. Boy scouts exist in Manosque, but is has a weird reputation as a far right wing religious exclusive group. Not something you want to be a part of. It comes across a little like a milder version one of Hitler's youth groups. So, needless to say, austin isn't a part of that. I need to get more info anyway, plus I'm not keen on driving to Manosque on my days off. That would be too much driving!!
Nicolas: going well. he is in daycare 4 days a week. He likes it and seems to have some friends. he is sweet and I got him potty trained over the summer!!! Yeah!! Caca is still a problem, but at least he can wee wee in the potty. I think it is easier to train boys that girls. You simply let them run around naked during the summer and let them wee outside on plants, trees, bugs, etc. They learn quickly it's fun to wee on stuff. Gives them a goal, not to mention aim.
One of my students from last year lost her mommy over the summer about 1 week before school started. It was horrible. I have never seen more people cry at once in my life. It is horrible to see children in such pain. It was almost unbearable. It was august, hot sun, so very hot. The church was so full about half the people had to stand in the back. One young woman passed out during the service and got carried out on a stretcher. That's the first time I've seen that. I brought Anaïs with me. I wanted her to be there for my other student, since they know each other. I think it's important for children to support other children. It's bad enough to lose a parent, but it doesn't help to be surrounded by adults on that day either. Her brother played the violin when they laid their mom to rest and it was truly one of the most beautiful and saddest moments of my life. I'm sad but grateful to have been able to be a silent whitness of such love and beauty.
I read a great book called Night by Elie Wiesel. It is about his experiences in Auschwitz. It is haunting. I started doing some research about the holocaust afterwards which is also a little too vivid and hard to digest that a country could systematically murder and torture sooo many people and children for a few years and that no one said anything and just allowed it to happen. I see the people in Germany as silent whitnesses, just getting on with their lives and not asking questions about what goes on behind the barbed wire and just allowing it because they have other more important things to do like go to work and make money to feed their families. Remember this was during the time of the great depression. My mom and I visited Dachau while we were in Munich. I'm glad I saw that. It makes more sense to me after seeing that. I've seen photos of Auschwitz and it feels like I've already been there.
Genocides have happened since then, the Congo for example. There will be more as long as no one says anything. Look at Guantanimo. We know this is wrong, right? They are holding children there illegally and other adults. Yet, who of us have stood up and said something? Not I. I am ashamed of this. I have strong feelings about injustices and things that make me sick, pretty much everything that George W Bush did during his presidency, yet I never said anything, nor did I march in the street and demonstrate. I am no better than a silent whitness to crime. Perhaps, real crime is all of us who are aware of injustice, yet we are guilty of not moving a finger to stop it or to speak out against it. I don't see how anyone of us can judge the German people during the war anymore than we should judge ourselves, for we are no better.
Thanks for taking the time to read about our news. I finally bought a new camera, so I can share some photos of the kids soon.
Cheers,
Jennel
Over the summer we lost one of our beloved cats, Rocky. We went to Lyon to visit Xaiver's mom and when we came back, Rocky wasn't here. We suspect he disappeard shortly after we left. I was very upset and stressed about his disappearance. The kids didn't seem to care much, only Anaïs has been sad and still talks about him. All of the kids first words was either cat or Rocky. Nicolas still calls Zoé, Rocky. For him all cats are called Rocky. In one moment of particular shocking callousness, Anaïs asked if we could trade up Zoé for a hamster. I said no. They want another cat since Zoé isn't particularly friendly to kids. Again, we said no. We're not ready to add another animal to take care of. I'd rather do something else.
Xavier got a work promotion to PVC I think, which means project manager of something. I don't really understand what he does, but he is very happy and really loves his job. His contract comes to end this time in Feb, so he'll have to wait and see if he can get it extended again. I am very happy for him. He joined a gym and works out regularly and still goes crewing and canoeing on the weekends at Lac d'Esperron. I joined the same gym this year and can only go 2 days a week that I have free of children, so it's not much, but it helps my back pain.
I received a job offer to work at the int'l school part-time (2 days a week) this year and it is really great! I teach ESL for pre-schoolers PS and MS (3-4 yr olds). It is a lot of fun. Teaching is truly the one job I've had that I really like.
Anaïs: did some pony riding over the toussaint break. She seemed to enjoy that alright. She's been asking to pony ride for a year now, so that went well. We'll see what we'll do for winter break. She is in CE1 (2nd grade). She seems happy. still sruggling to read in French and English. I worked with her over the summer just in English to help her with phonics and reading in general. I didn't push, I just wanted it to be fun. I also do soutien with her during my lunch breaks when I'm at school and I don't have meetings. She seems happy. I do soutien with her in English and maths. Her maths has greatly improved over the summer because we worked on that together as well. She desperately needs to do sport, so I have to find her something. Gréoux doesn't offer a whole lot of options. Sadly dance and gymnastice are not a part of them. She is limited to tennis and martial arts. We'll see. I don't consider pony riding as a sport, it's more of a bourgeois hobby.
Austin: in GS (kindergarden). He is learning his letters, though that seems to be coming slowly. He is fairly stubborn, but wants to work with me at night. There may be a bit of jealousy with Anaïs. So, we work a little on letters and numbers at night. I discovered recently that he can't recognize numbers beyond 5. So, we can work on that I suppose. He also needs sport, but I haven't signed him up yet. He is an out-doorsy boy and would love fishing and rock climbing. Boy scouts exist in Manosque, but is has a weird reputation as a far right wing religious exclusive group. Not something you want to be a part of. It comes across a little like a milder version one of Hitler's youth groups. So, needless to say, austin isn't a part of that. I need to get more info anyway, plus I'm not keen on driving to Manosque on my days off. That would be too much driving!!
Nicolas: going well. he is in daycare 4 days a week. He likes it and seems to have some friends. he is sweet and I got him potty trained over the summer!!! Yeah!! Caca is still a problem, but at least he can wee wee in the potty. I think it is easier to train boys that girls. You simply let them run around naked during the summer and let them wee outside on plants, trees, bugs, etc. They learn quickly it's fun to wee on stuff. Gives them a goal, not to mention aim.
One of my students from last year lost her mommy over the summer about 1 week before school started. It was horrible. I have never seen more people cry at once in my life. It is horrible to see children in such pain. It was almost unbearable. It was august, hot sun, so very hot. The church was so full about half the people had to stand in the back. One young woman passed out during the service and got carried out on a stretcher. That's the first time I've seen that. I brought Anaïs with me. I wanted her to be there for my other student, since they know each other. I think it's important for children to support other children. It's bad enough to lose a parent, but it doesn't help to be surrounded by adults on that day either. Her brother played the violin when they laid their mom to rest and it was truly one of the most beautiful and saddest moments of my life. I'm sad but grateful to have been able to be a silent whitness of such love and beauty.
I read a great book called Night by Elie Wiesel. It is about his experiences in Auschwitz. It is haunting. I started doing some research about the holocaust afterwards which is also a little too vivid and hard to digest that a country could systematically murder and torture sooo many people and children for a few years and that no one said anything and just allowed it to happen. I see the people in Germany as silent whitnesses, just getting on with their lives and not asking questions about what goes on behind the barbed wire and just allowing it because they have other more important things to do like go to work and make money to feed their families. Remember this was during the time of the great depression. My mom and I visited Dachau while we were in Munich. I'm glad I saw that. It makes more sense to me after seeing that. I've seen photos of Auschwitz and it feels like I've already been there.
Genocides have happened since then, the Congo for example. There will be more as long as no one says anything. Look at Guantanimo. We know this is wrong, right? They are holding children there illegally and other adults. Yet, who of us have stood up and said something? Not I. I am ashamed of this. I have strong feelings about injustices and things that make me sick, pretty much everything that George W Bush did during his presidency, yet I never said anything, nor did I march in the street and demonstrate. I am no better than a silent whitness to crime. Perhaps, real crime is all of us who are aware of injustice, yet we are guilty of not moving a finger to stop it or to speak out against it. I don't see how anyone of us can judge the German people during the war anymore than we should judge ourselves, for we are no better.
Thanks for taking the time to read about our news. I finally bought a new camera, so I can share some photos of the kids soon.
Cheers,
Jennel
Saturday, May 15, 2010
News May 2010
Some news to share:
I am still teaching at the International School and will continue until the end the the school year on July 2. I kept waiting and getting permission to get an extension. The time kept changing. Finally, all is okayed. I don't think the woman I'm replacing is coming back to school this year. I have an appointment with the school director Monday to see if I can secure a contract for next year. I would really love to continue teaching. It is a great job! I don't work on Wednesdays and we have 8 weeks of vacation during the school year. I work at night and on the weekends though to get my classes set up, but I've worked a bit in advance, so that makes it easier. I don't have soutien anymore during lunch, so I will have 2 hr lunch breaks to get photocopies done and things organized. I also am officially in the public french school system I think. So, I am technically building retirement, I think. I also have just recieved a French social security number.
Anais's first grade french section won a trip to Paris for writing a book. There was a contest with a publisher with 600 first grade classes all over France to write the story of a book and create a cover. Anais's first grade came in 3rd place. They are going to get their book published and will have some kind of ceremony in Paris. The kids are leaving by train from Aix-en-Provence this Tuesday early and will stay in a hotel overnight and come back late Wednesday night. They will see the Eiffel Tower and take a Bateau de Mouche on the Seine. They are very lucky.
I will now start doing some translations for the school soon. When my kids are ill and I take off of work, we have to make it up and one way that everyone is forced to do is translating, since the school has no official translator. So, I am the only person yet to translate. At least I will be able to put that on my resume. This Wednesday I have to work because we will be testing about 30 kids for their English abilities. It is only for pre-school, 3-4 yr olds. But this is my first time doing this. We have a friend whose son is getting tested, there are few spaces available, but I will see what I can do.
I'm going to get my papers together for l'autoentrepreneuer. It is a status for people in France that is easy to begin and become self-employed. I want to buy some educational books for school for references and for me to save time getting my classes set up each time. If the school doesn't pay me back which is likely, I want to be able to deduct my costs if possible. I will have the whole summer to work for myself as well.
I got Nikki into the local daycare here full-time, thank goodness and so far, found one person who is reliable who can watch Nikki when he's ill. I also offerred a set up to pay her to fold our laundry and iron our clothes. I'm overwhelmed with housework, laundry taking up the most amount of time. I don't want to spend my free-time doing laundry. Next on my list is find a cleaning woman to do the dirty work and I'll be all set.
Other news, Xavier got corrective eye surgury 2 weeks ago. He is not yet completely healed, but is seeing already pretty well. Austin will be going on an overnight exchange as well with his pre-school class soon. I still have to get his teacher the papers back.
My next goals are to get l'autoentrepeneuer set up Monday, get the education system figured out. I want to get my translation certification and go back to school and get an advanced degree. Most education is afterall free in France, so I want to take advantage of that. I'm going to keep my career in education because my kids are small, I want to have more time to spend with them. I have a hard time making choices regarding career and I know I choose not to compete in the traditional way, ie. kill myself regarding working hours. I want to have a well rounded life. I still want to write novels and become published, but it is more important right now to get my career started and stabilized a bit. Writing will come later. We also want to buy a house here, though the costs are staggering and the size is nothing more than a human box. That is a little frustrating. I knew I wanted to go back to work. I just didn't realize how badly I needed it. I like getting out of the house and having a purpose. Educating kids, you actually see them learn and increase their knowledge. It is nice. I'm learning a lot. I really wanted to work for myself, but lacked the self-confidence, because I had very little experience. That was my problem. Now, I feel much better, even though I've only been teaching full-time technically for 2 months. I've learned a lot in 2 months. One of my American colleagues said the English teachers got together and all support hiring me on full-time for next year. They are giving me a positive reccomendation. I had a very rocky beginning, but I think everyone does. I still have a lot to learn about teaching methods and more importantly for things that don't come nearly as naturally as teaching as controlling a classroom and children. I'm buying books now about classroom management and sort of reward systems and punishment for naughty kids who are disruptive and don't learn. There
is a huge amount yet that I need to learn regarding teaching. It's nice to use my brain again. Xavier is much happier as well. I finally have a perfect balance in my life. I feel much better and am soooo thankful to be able to work again and really, truly have the perfect job for the current time in my life. I couldn't imagine anything better than what I'm doing right now, including the hours. It is really great! I am very happy and have luckily shortened the length of depression one associates with moving to a new country. The first 4 months being in France were difficult, being socially isolated. But we have started to have friends now and I feel much more integrated. I am very, very fortunate. The international school is a bubble and the international people are well educated and well-travelled. I don't want all of our friends to come from this bubble, but I am soooo thankful to have access to this bubble in the first place.
Have a good day!
I am still teaching at the International School and will continue until the end the the school year on July 2. I kept waiting and getting permission to get an extension. The time kept changing. Finally, all is okayed. I don't think the woman I'm replacing is coming back to school this year. I have an appointment with the school director Monday to see if I can secure a contract for next year. I would really love to continue teaching. It is a great job! I don't work on Wednesdays and we have 8 weeks of vacation during the school year. I work at night and on the weekends though to get my classes set up, but I've worked a bit in advance, so that makes it easier. I don't have soutien anymore during lunch, so I will have 2 hr lunch breaks to get photocopies done and things organized. I also am officially in the public french school system I think. So, I am technically building retirement, I think. I also have just recieved a French social security number.
Anais's first grade french section won a trip to Paris for writing a book. There was a contest with a publisher with 600 first grade classes all over France to write the story of a book and create a cover. Anais's first grade came in 3rd place. They are going to get their book published and will have some kind of ceremony in Paris. The kids are leaving by train from Aix-en-Provence this Tuesday early and will stay in a hotel overnight and come back late Wednesday night. They will see the Eiffel Tower and take a Bateau de Mouche on the Seine. They are very lucky.
I will now start doing some translations for the school soon. When my kids are ill and I take off of work, we have to make it up and one way that everyone is forced to do is translating, since the school has no official translator. So, I am the only person yet to translate. At least I will be able to put that on my resume. This Wednesday I have to work because we will be testing about 30 kids for their English abilities. It is only for pre-school, 3-4 yr olds. But this is my first time doing this. We have a friend whose son is getting tested, there are few spaces available, but I will see what I can do.
I'm going to get my papers together for l'autoentrepreneuer. It is a status for people in France that is easy to begin and become self-employed. I want to buy some educational books for school for references and for me to save time getting my classes set up each time. If the school doesn't pay me back which is likely, I want to be able to deduct my costs if possible. I will have the whole summer to work for myself as well.
I got Nikki into the local daycare here full-time, thank goodness and so far, found one person who is reliable who can watch Nikki when he's ill. I also offerred a set up to pay her to fold our laundry and iron our clothes. I'm overwhelmed with housework, laundry taking up the most amount of time. I don't want to spend my free-time doing laundry. Next on my list is find a cleaning woman to do the dirty work and I'll be all set.
Other news, Xavier got corrective eye surgury 2 weeks ago. He is not yet completely healed, but is seeing already pretty well. Austin will be going on an overnight exchange as well with his pre-school class soon. I still have to get his teacher the papers back.
My next goals are to get l'autoentrepeneuer set up Monday, get the education system figured out. I want to get my translation certification and go back to school and get an advanced degree. Most education is afterall free in France, so I want to take advantage of that. I'm going to keep my career in education because my kids are small, I want to have more time to spend with them. I have a hard time making choices regarding career and I know I choose not to compete in the traditional way, ie. kill myself regarding working hours. I want to have a well rounded life. I still want to write novels and become published, but it is more important right now to get my career started and stabilized a bit. Writing will come later. We also want to buy a house here, though the costs are staggering and the size is nothing more than a human box. That is a little frustrating. I knew I wanted to go back to work. I just didn't realize how badly I needed it. I like getting out of the house and having a purpose. Educating kids, you actually see them learn and increase their knowledge. It is nice. I'm learning a lot. I really wanted to work for myself, but lacked the self-confidence, because I had very little experience. That was my problem. Now, I feel much better, even though I've only been teaching full-time technically for 2 months. I've learned a lot in 2 months. One of my American colleagues said the English teachers got together and all support hiring me on full-time for next year. They are giving me a positive reccomendation. I had a very rocky beginning, but I think everyone does. I still have a lot to learn about teaching methods and more importantly for things that don't come nearly as naturally as teaching as controlling a classroom and children. I'm buying books now about classroom management and sort of reward systems and punishment for naughty kids who are disruptive and don't learn. There
is a huge amount yet that I need to learn regarding teaching. It's nice to use my brain again. Xavier is much happier as well. I finally have a perfect balance in my life. I feel much better and am soooo thankful to be able to work again and really, truly have the perfect job for the current time in my life. I couldn't imagine anything better than what I'm doing right now, including the hours. It is really great! I am very happy and have luckily shortened the length of depression one associates with moving to a new country. The first 4 months being in France were difficult, being socially isolated. But we have started to have friends now and I feel much more integrated. I am very, very fortunate. The international school is a bubble and the international people are well educated and well-travelled. I don't want all of our friends to come from this bubble, but I am soooo thankful to have access to this bubble in the first place.
Have a good day!
Sunday, February 28, 2010
News March 2010
I finally have some news to share. I finally have a job teaching ESL (English as a second language) at the International School Manosque where my kids go to school. I am replacing a woman who injured her knee and has been out for a few months now. The school got permission to hire me for 1 month. I will be hired like a normal teacher in the French public school system. I got the job as of Friday morning and I start tomorrow. I'm scrambling to find daycare for Nikki. They can take him all day every day but fridays at the daycare, so I am looking for a Nanny for Fridays and so far cannot find anyone. I'm very stressed about this.
I will be teaching 4 yr olds, 3-5 graders. Some are beginners like they never learned English in their lives, some are intermediate. I will be supporting the English teacher for 3-5 graders. They have almost zero supplies and no money to buy some. They have a computer, but I must find out if I can get an access code. I also need an access code for the photocopier, which I do not have. The school kids have work books and the pre-schoolers have nothing. I still have my book that I purchased in Germany for the kindergarten, so that will work out. I have no CD player for music. I will have to see if Aude the director of Primary school can hook me up with the materials. What is odd is I think I will really enjoy this job. I am sooooo happy to go back to work and this has all been extremely short notice.
I really hope I will be able to stay permanently, so we will see how I do. They said they will have no money to pay me after march. I'm not sure how the bureaucracy works in France, except there is a lot of it. I was welcomed on the staff by everyone, so things are moving along. I was praying that they would hire me for March to take over Sue's spot. I am stressed and worried, but very happy. It feels like when I worked for Sphairos in Munich, they just drop you off on the spot with little direction and zero supplies. It is pretty crazy. You just have to go with the flow, except I want to coordinate with the 3-5 grade teacher to support her curriculum.
Other than that, things are ok here. Anais is having a hard time with numbers. She can't grasp anything past 10, I don't understand why. She fails her spelling bees EVERYTIME no matter how much we practice at home, every day, she still fails. So I'm working with her on that.
I would love to remain onboard the school permanently if possible, get the kids set up for daycare and take care of things. That would be great. It is very hard to plan anything in advance when I may or may not have a job for April. They will probably let me know on March 31 if I can continue into April. Craziness. Unless the other teacher comes back, then I will be out of a job, but may be able to secure an ESL teaching job for next year, since they will be expanding their ESL pogram. They are creating a European school in joint with the international school. I'm not sure what that means, but they did tell me that if I do a good job I might be able to come back and teach in the fall for a yr long contract. I hate being stressed like this, but it's normal. I was soooooo happy to get this job. Things couldn't line up any better.
Xavier is not as stressed about his job either. A friend of ours gave us a line about Fusion for Energy which is part of the European commission, good salaries, no tax. They are based in Barcelona Spain, but our friend has a contract here in France for about 5 yrs. Xavier seems just fine with the prospect of maybe moving to Barcelona. Let's just try to get him this job first. They will be publishing their jobs in the next few days. Xavier negociated to work 1-2 days a week out of the Altran office in Aix to put together a large scale risk and project mgt sales pitch-contract for Altran for large scale projects. The rest of the time he works here at ITER. This way he was able to extend his contract until June and now his boss at ITER said he's going to try to get his contract extended until Sept. So, at least now he still has a job until June. After that, we will see. If I could secure a job for next yr for Sept, that would really help us psychologically.
I really wanted to start a company teaching English on my own but had very little work experience and thus don't feel confident enough to do it. I really want to get more work experience. I started teaching a few korean friends French, so that helps to give me confidence as well in working with adults which is different than working with kids. I work a lot on confidence. When I get experience, I feel more confident and will be able to do more later. By the way, one reason why I got this job at the school is because they are looking for ployglotts. Most people can speak about 3 languages fluently. They needed people who speak French fluently and also German or Spanish. I also had ESL certification, probably the only logical decision I made in college. Anyway, this feels like a psychological springboard from which I can re-begin my adult career and finally get rid of my children, god bless their little souls, and do something for myself. Re-establish goals for myself, finally!!
Cheers!
I will be teaching 4 yr olds, 3-5 graders. Some are beginners like they never learned English in their lives, some are intermediate. I will be supporting the English teacher for 3-5 graders. They have almost zero supplies and no money to buy some. They have a computer, but I must find out if I can get an access code. I also need an access code for the photocopier, which I do not have. The school kids have work books and the pre-schoolers have nothing. I still have my book that I purchased in Germany for the kindergarten, so that will work out. I have no CD player for music. I will have to see if Aude the director of Primary school can hook me up with the materials. What is odd is I think I will really enjoy this job. I am sooooo happy to go back to work and this has all been extremely short notice.
I really hope I will be able to stay permanently, so we will see how I do. They said they will have no money to pay me after march. I'm not sure how the bureaucracy works in France, except there is a lot of it. I was welcomed on the staff by everyone, so things are moving along. I was praying that they would hire me for March to take over Sue's spot. I am stressed and worried, but very happy. It feels like when I worked for Sphairos in Munich, they just drop you off on the spot with little direction and zero supplies. It is pretty crazy. You just have to go with the flow, except I want to coordinate with the 3-5 grade teacher to support her curriculum.
Other than that, things are ok here. Anais is having a hard time with numbers. She can't grasp anything past 10, I don't understand why. She fails her spelling bees EVERYTIME no matter how much we practice at home, every day, she still fails. So I'm working with her on that.
I would love to remain onboard the school permanently if possible, get the kids set up for daycare and take care of things. That would be great. It is very hard to plan anything in advance when I may or may not have a job for April. They will probably let me know on March 31 if I can continue into April. Craziness. Unless the other teacher comes back, then I will be out of a job, but may be able to secure an ESL teaching job for next year, since they will be expanding their ESL pogram. They are creating a European school in joint with the international school. I'm not sure what that means, but they did tell me that if I do a good job I might be able to come back and teach in the fall for a yr long contract. I hate being stressed like this, but it's normal. I was soooooo happy to get this job. Things couldn't line up any better.
Xavier is not as stressed about his job either. A friend of ours gave us a line about Fusion for Energy which is part of the European commission, good salaries, no tax. They are based in Barcelona Spain, but our friend has a contract here in France for about 5 yrs. Xavier seems just fine with the prospect of maybe moving to Barcelona. Let's just try to get him this job first. They will be publishing their jobs in the next few days. Xavier negociated to work 1-2 days a week out of the Altran office in Aix to put together a large scale risk and project mgt sales pitch-contract for Altran for large scale projects. The rest of the time he works here at ITER. This way he was able to extend his contract until June and now his boss at ITER said he's going to try to get his contract extended until Sept. So, at least now he still has a job until June. After that, we will see. If I could secure a job for next yr for Sept, that would really help us psychologically.
I really wanted to start a company teaching English on my own but had very little work experience and thus don't feel confident enough to do it. I really want to get more work experience. I started teaching a few korean friends French, so that helps to give me confidence as well in working with adults which is different than working with kids. I work a lot on confidence. When I get experience, I feel more confident and will be able to do more later. By the way, one reason why I got this job at the school is because they are looking for ployglotts. Most people can speak about 3 languages fluently. They needed people who speak French fluently and also German or Spanish. I also had ESL certification, probably the only logical decision I made in college. Anyway, this feels like a psychological springboard from which I can re-begin my adult career and finally get rid of my children, god bless their little souls, and do something for myself. Re-establish goals for myself, finally!!
Cheers!
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Well we made it to France
So, we made the journey from Germany to France on June 13, 2009. It was a long, long, long drive. We left in the evening and stopped someplace in France just beyond Switzerland at around 1:30 AM. We were bone tired and all the hotels made us take 2 rooms because we have 3 kids. Next time I will lie about the number of children I have. It is ridiculous. So when we got to the rooms Xavier and I had an argument as to where the kids would sleep. He won and Anais and Austin slept alone in a room, while XAvier, Nicolas and I slept in our room. So I heard lots of mischief and had to be cop for awhile. Finally, I thought they were asleep around 3 AM and went to sleep myself.
It's a good thing I can smell smoke in my sleep....
When I awoke to smoke fumes and I heard Anais and Austin giggling in the next room. I flew out of bed as pictures of the hotel burning down flashed across my mind, I wondered why aren't the smoke alarms going off? When I got to their bedroom, they had shut the adjoining door and also shut the door to their bed. When I got inside, smoke was pouring out of the lit table lamp next to Austin and he was standing there stark naked laughing. I asked " What is going on in here?" as I ran to the lamp to stop the fire. He answered, "We're baking a cake." : )
I turned off the lamp and pulled the smoldering clothes out of it that were wedged inside the lamp shade. I found Austin's PJ's closest to the light bulb. There were holes and it was covered in embers. I attempted to blow the embers out, but they merely flew off his jammies and landed on the bed. Naturally, starting a fire on the bed is a really bad idea, so I put his PJ's, smoldering embers and all in the sink. Needless to say, his pyjammas are ruined, so he was forced to sleep naked for the rest of the night. I put him in the cot next to Xavier and I went to sleep with Anais in her bed. All was well for the rest of the night.
The next day, we drove another 7 hrs to get to the gite since we didn't have keys to get into the house. The weather was already better in France, the vegetation had changed and it was a lot warmer and SUNNIER!!!!
Oh the sunshine, dry air and the smell of lavender. Oh happiness, oh joy. My nose was in shock. I've had a sinus infection since the year 2004. My nose tried very hard to get a sinus infection. I kept sneezing and sneezing and waiting for it to come, but it never happened. I just sneezed and was well again. How crazy.
KIDS:
Anais spoke French right away and understood that here she doesn't speak German or English. I have to say, I was pretty impressed with her attitude. Sometimes she would cry and say she missed her friends and Martina, her teacher. She also missed Lukas and Eva our neighbors. I felt terrible for her and wanted to get her to make friends as soon as possible. I put the kids in summer camp locally for July and August and started Nicolas in daycare as well. Anais made a few friends in camp and was ok happy. We met the only other American in Greoux, she is from the East coast and is a writer. I thought I was going to faint from joy. I always wanted to meet writers, but I never know any. They always seem so mysterious. Our kids made friends with their kids, so the summer went by without too many hitches.
Austin hated camp and hated France. He wanted to go back to his friends in Germany and asked a lot after his best friends. I explained he won't be able to go to their house because Steingau is too far away now but he'll make other friends here. He didn't much care for that answer. The camp counselors had a lot of grief with Austin because he made no pretense about hating camp. He couldn't understand and would refuse to join the group. He told me no one likes him and he tried to speak to the other kids in German at first, then English. Some of the camp counselors could speak English and tried with him, but he was also unresponsive.
Nicolas reacted ok to daycare. It took the entire summer to slowly get him acclimated to going to daycare, starting at 15 min and finally getting up to 3 hrs. That was a little frustrating. The daycare ladies had an issue because Nicolas doesn't speak French. Mind you, Nikki was barely a year old. They wanted me to speak French to him at home. It was bad memories of Kinderpark with Angelica all over again. I told them I will not speak French to my son, but will do baby sign if they like. Having already taken a course, we quickly ran through the different signs. Well, guess what? German baby sign is totally different from French baby sign, so I had to learn their sign language and practice it with Nicolas. I told them to keep speaking french and using the sign together so he will learn quickly. He's a clever little chap afterall. He can't speak much but can say "It's what?" and "What's that?" That took me a long time to understand. He would point to things and ask what they are. So, when I finally got it, I would tell him the words and repeat them and he would laugh and laugh.
The house is ok. We live in a village of old people. The old and ailing come here to Les Thermes. It is an old Roman Bath House filled with doctors curing every need. So, in the summer Greoux is flooded with silver haired people. I heard the numbers are this: Greoux has 2,500 permanent residents and in the summer we have 40,000 residents, all of whom are retired and ailing. At least it's not Lourdes. Lourdes, France is an interesting place to visit at least once in your lifetime. If you can stomache thousands of people working for the Red Cross, monks, and thousands upon thousands of nuns and little dime store shops of the virgin Mary paraphanilia, and of course the worst form of the sick and ailing, all of whom are very close to death. It is a famous and sacred place where some random farm girl claimed to see the virgin mary appear like 20 times. There is a natural spring that has become holy, so the sick and ailing cue up to be dipped into the holy water to be cured of their ailments.
I just received my carte de sejour so I am legally able to work in France now. My sisters came to visit for about 1 month total. Rhonda kept me very busy as we discovered the area. My favorite is still canoeing in the Gorges du Verdon. Sharone and I went hiking in the Calanques near Marseilles. that was really fun. Oddly, I had never visited the Calanques before. So, I think we had a good time. Life felt very calm after they left.
I haven't experienced much culture shock, just with everyone smacking their kids around. That was a little shocking. No such thing as time outs in France, just smack, smack, smack. Walking across the street, bam. Walking through the grocery store, a little yelling, then smack. Out on the play ground, the kid doesn't come over fast enough or share his toys, smack. The amount of light and semi-frivilous smacking was a little shocking. Beyond that, people were so nice to me. They always talk. There is a lot of banter. I think banter is important with people in the south. It is important to chit chat, who'd a thunk it?
That is all the news there is here. Oh yes the kids got into the international school in Manosque. They are in the English-French section. So they have English 2 days a week and French 2 days a week. They are also in FLE which is French for foreigners to get their French up to speed with the other kids. Hopefully the next news I will give you, I will have a job.
Talk to you again soon. I do think about all of you often. Take care everyone!
Love,
Jennel
It's a good thing I can smell smoke in my sleep....
When I awoke to smoke fumes and I heard Anais and Austin giggling in the next room. I flew out of bed as pictures of the hotel burning down flashed across my mind, I wondered why aren't the smoke alarms going off? When I got to their bedroom, they had shut the adjoining door and also shut the door to their bed. When I got inside, smoke was pouring out of the lit table lamp next to Austin and he was standing there stark naked laughing. I asked " What is going on in here?" as I ran to the lamp to stop the fire. He answered, "We're baking a cake." : )
I turned off the lamp and pulled the smoldering clothes out of it that were wedged inside the lamp shade. I found Austin's PJ's closest to the light bulb. There were holes and it was covered in embers. I attempted to blow the embers out, but they merely flew off his jammies and landed on the bed. Naturally, starting a fire on the bed is a really bad idea, so I put his PJ's, smoldering embers and all in the sink. Needless to say, his pyjammas are ruined, so he was forced to sleep naked for the rest of the night. I put him in the cot next to Xavier and I went to sleep with Anais in her bed. All was well for the rest of the night.
The next day, we drove another 7 hrs to get to the gite since we didn't have keys to get into the house. The weather was already better in France, the vegetation had changed and it was a lot warmer and SUNNIER!!!!
Oh the sunshine, dry air and the smell of lavender. Oh happiness, oh joy. My nose was in shock. I've had a sinus infection since the year 2004. My nose tried very hard to get a sinus infection. I kept sneezing and sneezing and waiting for it to come, but it never happened. I just sneezed and was well again. How crazy.
KIDS:
Anais spoke French right away and understood that here she doesn't speak German or English. I have to say, I was pretty impressed with her attitude. Sometimes she would cry and say she missed her friends and Martina, her teacher. She also missed Lukas and Eva our neighbors. I felt terrible for her and wanted to get her to make friends as soon as possible. I put the kids in summer camp locally for July and August and started Nicolas in daycare as well. Anais made a few friends in camp and was ok happy. We met the only other American in Greoux, she is from the East coast and is a writer. I thought I was going to faint from joy. I always wanted to meet writers, but I never know any. They always seem so mysterious. Our kids made friends with their kids, so the summer went by without too many hitches.
Austin hated camp and hated France. He wanted to go back to his friends in Germany and asked a lot after his best friends. I explained he won't be able to go to their house because Steingau is too far away now but he'll make other friends here. He didn't much care for that answer. The camp counselors had a lot of grief with Austin because he made no pretense about hating camp. He couldn't understand and would refuse to join the group. He told me no one likes him and he tried to speak to the other kids in German at first, then English. Some of the camp counselors could speak English and tried with him, but he was also unresponsive.
Nicolas reacted ok to daycare. It took the entire summer to slowly get him acclimated to going to daycare, starting at 15 min and finally getting up to 3 hrs. That was a little frustrating. The daycare ladies had an issue because Nicolas doesn't speak French. Mind you, Nikki was barely a year old. They wanted me to speak French to him at home. It was bad memories of Kinderpark with Angelica all over again. I told them I will not speak French to my son, but will do baby sign if they like. Having already taken a course, we quickly ran through the different signs. Well, guess what? German baby sign is totally different from French baby sign, so I had to learn their sign language and practice it with Nicolas. I told them to keep speaking french and using the sign together so he will learn quickly. He's a clever little chap afterall. He can't speak much but can say "It's what?" and "What's that?" That took me a long time to understand. He would point to things and ask what they are. So, when I finally got it, I would tell him the words and repeat them and he would laugh and laugh.
The house is ok. We live in a village of old people. The old and ailing come here to Les Thermes. It is an old Roman Bath House filled with doctors curing every need. So, in the summer Greoux is flooded with silver haired people. I heard the numbers are this: Greoux has 2,500 permanent residents and in the summer we have 40,000 residents, all of whom are retired and ailing. At least it's not Lourdes. Lourdes, France is an interesting place to visit at least once in your lifetime. If you can stomache thousands of people working for the Red Cross, monks, and thousands upon thousands of nuns and little dime store shops of the virgin Mary paraphanilia, and of course the worst form of the sick and ailing, all of whom are very close to death. It is a famous and sacred place where some random farm girl claimed to see the virgin mary appear like 20 times. There is a natural spring that has become holy, so the sick and ailing cue up to be dipped into the holy water to be cured of their ailments.
I just received my carte de sejour so I am legally able to work in France now. My sisters came to visit for about 1 month total. Rhonda kept me very busy as we discovered the area. My favorite is still canoeing in the Gorges du Verdon. Sharone and I went hiking in the Calanques near Marseilles. that was really fun. Oddly, I had never visited the Calanques before. So, I think we had a good time. Life felt very calm after they left.
I haven't experienced much culture shock, just with everyone smacking their kids around. That was a little shocking. No such thing as time outs in France, just smack, smack, smack. Walking across the street, bam. Walking through the grocery store, a little yelling, then smack. Out on the play ground, the kid doesn't come over fast enough or share his toys, smack. The amount of light and semi-frivilous smacking was a little shocking. Beyond that, people were so nice to me. They always talk. There is a lot of banter. I think banter is important with people in the south. It is important to chit chat, who'd a thunk it?
That is all the news there is here. Oh yes the kids got into the international school in Manosque. They are in the English-French section. So they have English 2 days a week and French 2 days a week. They are also in FLE which is French for foreigners to get their French up to speed with the other kids. Hopefully the next news I will give you, I will have a job.
Talk to you again soon. I do think about all of you often. Take care everyone!
Love,
Jennel
Monday, June 8, 2009
It is moving time again
Forwarded address:
we have no house number yet, the house is brand new.
Chemin du hameau du Plan
04800 Gréoux-les-Bains
France
don't have a phone number yet. movers come this friday and we will be on the road by saturday. we should arrive in Greoux sometime btw sunday and monday depending on whether or not we stop over at Coralie's house. the neighbors are giving us a good-bye party with the neighborhood on friday at 4 PM. not sure what to expect. Anais and austin will have a good-bye party on wednesday at kindergarten. as usual i have too much to do before friday. xavier flies in thursday night on his birthday. i have to do some presorting now and have accomplished most of what i need to do so it is ok. the kids have off on thursday so not sure what we'll do. i still have to call friends here and say good-bye. not everyone knows we're leaving. some people are sad, some probably not.
i'm not sure how i feel. i don't really feel anything to be honest. i have some friends here and i will miss them but that is about it. i think i will miss some things about germany and about bavaria. bavaria is really beautiful with the rolling meadows, green pine forests and mountains. when it is sunny, it is heaven. it's just sunny maybe 1 out of 3-4 days. i won't miss the rain. what can i say, there is a reason why it is so green. it is cold when it rains even in the summer, so a summer day can be quite extreme in temperature based on how much sun there is. i will miss the recycling attitude, germany is very pro-environment. i might even miss its directness. i had a hard time with people telling me what to do. i was always extremely affronted, but after 5 yrs, i'm used to it and find myself adapting to it. people are just trying to be helpful when they give you advice off the street, they don't mean anything bad by it. i'm not offended anymore. i found that my biggest problem was MY intolerance. i was the one who would not tolerate german culture and i had to adapt. it took a good 3 yrs to understand the culture and be able to adapt to it. it also helps when you make a lot of progress in the language then you can actually communicate and there is less room open for misunderstandings, which happens all the time at the beginning.
everyone thinks we'll be happier in france. xavier seems happier despite being away from the kids. he has been gone now for 1 month and i think for him being away is very tough. for me it has been interesting. i miss xavier and his companionship but i have been quite busy and socialable so it hasn't been that hard to be honest. i was sad during the time before he left but accepted it to be as it is and it was ok. i'm happy and looking forward to seeing him again soon. the kids really miss their papa. i feel a little odd not being too sad. it's kind of strange. i was very very sad when i left texas, but that was also my friends, my surrogate family in austin, and my family and culture knowing i was going to be cut off for a long time. yes, i was very very sad to leave the US and i did start to cry in Jill's car when she dropped me off at the airport. it was hard.
moving to france will be considerably less difficult. my main worries are not knowing where i am or where to shop for groceries, cat litter, things like that. we'll have lots of things to change over like car registration, insurances, kids schools, etc. it's not the end of the world, it's just a lot of work. xavier has already been working diligently on the papers and school registrations on his side. we are trying to get anais into the int'l school in manosque. we'll see if we can pull it off or not. i hope it's free but we don't even know if there is a price.
beyond that everything is more or less normal here. i'm getting anxious to get out of here, kind of antsy you know? i just want to get it over with. it is still really odd not to feel sadness. i don't know what's wrong? i don't feel joy either, just mostly little stresses and worries. i'm worried for anais more than anything else. she will feel the move the most and i don't like taking her away from her friends. even if we stayed here, she would have to go to a different school than her friends anyway because we live out of district and i couldn't get her into holzkirchen where she is going to kindergarten. i find the people feeding into the local school a little dorfisch (too small town) i feel much better with the holzkircheners. my friends are either ausländers (foreigners) or people who have lived abroad. i'm sure it will be the same in france. xavier already has more friends in france in less than 1 month than he has had here in germany in 5 yrs.
germans are very reserved. socially it's like doing a waltz, you don't really touch anyone and you keep dancing around in circles but never get really close. americans don't dance around in circles. there is no formality to making friends. we don't have walls that you need to climb over. we either like each other or we don't. not sure how it is in france. i think it is inbtw US and Germany socially. my language inability was my largest single barrier to creating friendships and relationships. it was very difficult more than anything else. the one thing i have truly learned in germany is isolation. my 9 months in dresden were probably some of the worst if not THE worst 9 months of my life. a woman with no ability to socialize in any remedial way with ANYONE, day in and day out, not able to speak to anyone or have any friends is like taking a flower and depriving her of water and sun. I don't EVER want to experience that again. it is isolation to the fullest and it is hard. you don'T make an effort getting into any social organization if even one exists in dresden because you know you are leaving soon, you just don't have the exact date. the stress i have now is peanuts compared to what i experienced in dresden. xavier and i were like puppets on a string being pulled in every direction and not knowing when the strings will be pulled by his boss and by the restructureing of his company.
moving employees around happens a lot in germany. if you want to get ahead then you have to move the minute they decide they want to put you in Dortmund, Dresden, Frankfurt, you name it. many families end up split. the wife and children remain in one place while the husband moves to another city for a yr or 2 while he works for the same exact company, just because some boss in his company decides it. he has to be a good soldier or his career will suffer. woman only follow for a time until they stop and plant themselves and their family because it's not fair to the children. everyone agrees this company culture is stupid and accomplishes nothing, but that is the way it is, so people have to just accept it. it is very specific to german culture, not sure why.
the good thing about germans is their impeccable tidiness. you can literally eat off their floor. you can eat off any part of a german's house, it is so impeccably clean. germans are clean, organized, perfectionists. the gardens and lawns are tended to with perfection and love and care. wood logs are stacked evenly and covered appropriately so as to not get wet when it rains. clothes are mended and ironed. homes are cleaned at least 1X a week and floors are swept at least every day. toys are organized into their appropriate boxes as well as papers and mail. i have never seen a country so organized in my life. people take great pride in their homes and in their work. a housewife is a job and is upheld to perfection. cakes are all homemade. homework is overseen by mom. kids are taken to sports adn music lessons by mom. acutally men go to work and women do everything else. i say men work but women make the world go 'round. i'm very impressed by german women. they do so much, most of which is never paid. they don't complain or anything, it's just normal. i have the impression though that they believe their work to be inferior to that of a man's. i alone seem to hold the opposite view. in america we would call them supermoms. the minimum bar is just held so high as a mother it's kind of impressive. a lot of mom's still work part time. i think most feel it too much of a strain to work full time, which i understand. imagine an entire country of perfection. men go to work without question and do whatever their companies ask of them, sacrifice everything for their work without question or standing up to authority, good soldiers. women taking care of the welfare of the family, children, home, education, and some work on top of that. it is a very efficient country filled with pride in every identity. everyone takes their work very seriously no matter how menial a job, no matter how little education one has, all work is done with pride and accomplished to perfection. i think i will miss this the most. the pride, the perfection, the cleanliness, the reliability of germans. when a german says something, they mean it. if a german says they are going to do something, or invite you to their home, they mean it. they are wonderfully reliable. i hope it is the one thing i have learned from them becuase i always felt myself to be flaky and unreliable and late. i hope i have changed for the better from germany.
we will soon see. france is a very different culture. i'm curious to see how i will react. it's been 10 yrs since i lived in france and a lot has happened in those 10 yrs. i think i've matured a little i suppose, not sure in which way though. sometimes you are sure of certain things you need to experience in order to advance in life, you know? being a mom will advance in a certain way because it has its challenges. the next step for me is to work independently for myself and hopefully employ other people. this is my next goal in france. that will afford me a whole new learning experience and i have more skills that can be sold in france than in the US. my biggest set backs now are lack of concentration or making choices, lack of focus and fear. i will have to make a decision adn get over my fear pretty fast. i have until christmas to get my situation cleared becuase xavier has a job only until then for sure. worst case scenario he will be unemployed again by christmas. i chose to be stable now. we want to buy a house in 1 yr. that is the goal, so i plan on sticking to it. i want to have a pied a terre in europe and one in the states, minimum. i think it is important and completely feasible.
that is all the news there is here. anais had her birthday party yesterday. i think it was a big success. her best friends are very sad she is leaving. i think anais is sad too. she has made it very clear she does not want to go to school in french, she wants to go to school in english and if not english, then german. i told her she will have to learn french anyway, but we will see what we can do. if we can get her into the int'l school, it will be half english half french, which would be perfect for her. i think she would be soooo happy with other internationals who are all in the same boat. her 2 best friends are internationals. 1 mom is polish living in germany, the other is german but lived in hong kong for 3 yrs and went to an english speaking kindergarten. interesting. i can't blame her, i'm better friends with both their mommy's as well.
i hope this blog hasn't been too negative. i have been getting a little criticism about my negativity. don't mean to be whiny or anything, sometimes i just put out some of my frustrations on paper i suppose. i hope you are all well. and i will be dropping off the radar for sometime until we get the phone line straightened out. with the moves and paying double rents, we are going to be very short on cash, so the phone line might wait until july or even later. so i will let you know when i get back online. i hope you have a nice summer and don't worry if you don't hear any news for awhile, this is how it goes i suppose. speak to you again soon.
love, jennel
we have no house number yet, the house is brand new.
Chemin du hameau du Plan
04800 Gréoux-les-Bains
France
don't have a phone number yet. movers come this friday and we will be on the road by saturday. we should arrive in Greoux sometime btw sunday and monday depending on whether or not we stop over at Coralie's house. the neighbors are giving us a good-bye party with the neighborhood on friday at 4 PM. not sure what to expect. Anais and austin will have a good-bye party on wednesday at kindergarten. as usual i have too much to do before friday. xavier flies in thursday night on his birthday. i have to do some presorting now and have accomplished most of what i need to do so it is ok. the kids have off on thursday so not sure what we'll do. i still have to call friends here and say good-bye. not everyone knows we're leaving. some people are sad, some probably not.
i'm not sure how i feel. i don't really feel anything to be honest. i have some friends here and i will miss them but that is about it. i think i will miss some things about germany and about bavaria. bavaria is really beautiful with the rolling meadows, green pine forests and mountains. when it is sunny, it is heaven. it's just sunny maybe 1 out of 3-4 days. i won't miss the rain. what can i say, there is a reason why it is so green. it is cold when it rains even in the summer, so a summer day can be quite extreme in temperature based on how much sun there is. i will miss the recycling attitude, germany is very pro-environment. i might even miss its directness. i had a hard time with people telling me what to do. i was always extremely affronted, but after 5 yrs, i'm used to it and find myself adapting to it. people are just trying to be helpful when they give you advice off the street, they don't mean anything bad by it. i'm not offended anymore. i found that my biggest problem was MY intolerance. i was the one who would not tolerate german culture and i had to adapt. it took a good 3 yrs to understand the culture and be able to adapt to it. it also helps when you make a lot of progress in the language then you can actually communicate and there is less room open for misunderstandings, which happens all the time at the beginning.
everyone thinks we'll be happier in france. xavier seems happier despite being away from the kids. he has been gone now for 1 month and i think for him being away is very tough. for me it has been interesting. i miss xavier and his companionship but i have been quite busy and socialable so it hasn't been that hard to be honest. i was sad during the time before he left but accepted it to be as it is and it was ok. i'm happy and looking forward to seeing him again soon. the kids really miss their papa. i feel a little odd not being too sad. it's kind of strange. i was very very sad when i left texas, but that was also my friends, my surrogate family in austin, and my family and culture knowing i was going to be cut off for a long time. yes, i was very very sad to leave the US and i did start to cry in Jill's car when she dropped me off at the airport. it was hard.
moving to france will be considerably less difficult. my main worries are not knowing where i am or where to shop for groceries, cat litter, things like that. we'll have lots of things to change over like car registration, insurances, kids schools, etc. it's not the end of the world, it's just a lot of work. xavier has already been working diligently on the papers and school registrations on his side. we are trying to get anais into the int'l school in manosque. we'll see if we can pull it off or not. i hope it's free but we don't even know if there is a price.
beyond that everything is more or less normal here. i'm getting anxious to get out of here, kind of antsy you know? i just want to get it over with. it is still really odd not to feel sadness. i don't know what's wrong? i don't feel joy either, just mostly little stresses and worries. i'm worried for anais more than anything else. she will feel the move the most and i don't like taking her away from her friends. even if we stayed here, she would have to go to a different school than her friends anyway because we live out of district and i couldn't get her into holzkirchen where she is going to kindergarten. i find the people feeding into the local school a little dorfisch (too small town) i feel much better with the holzkircheners. my friends are either ausländers (foreigners) or people who have lived abroad. i'm sure it will be the same in france. xavier already has more friends in france in less than 1 month than he has had here in germany in 5 yrs.
germans are very reserved. socially it's like doing a waltz, you don't really touch anyone and you keep dancing around in circles but never get really close. americans don't dance around in circles. there is no formality to making friends. we don't have walls that you need to climb over. we either like each other or we don't. not sure how it is in france. i think it is inbtw US and Germany socially. my language inability was my largest single barrier to creating friendships and relationships. it was very difficult more than anything else. the one thing i have truly learned in germany is isolation. my 9 months in dresden were probably some of the worst if not THE worst 9 months of my life. a woman with no ability to socialize in any remedial way with ANYONE, day in and day out, not able to speak to anyone or have any friends is like taking a flower and depriving her of water and sun. I don't EVER want to experience that again. it is isolation to the fullest and it is hard. you don'T make an effort getting into any social organization if even one exists in dresden because you know you are leaving soon, you just don't have the exact date. the stress i have now is peanuts compared to what i experienced in dresden. xavier and i were like puppets on a string being pulled in every direction and not knowing when the strings will be pulled by his boss and by the restructureing of his company.
moving employees around happens a lot in germany. if you want to get ahead then you have to move the minute they decide they want to put you in Dortmund, Dresden, Frankfurt, you name it. many families end up split. the wife and children remain in one place while the husband moves to another city for a yr or 2 while he works for the same exact company, just because some boss in his company decides it. he has to be a good soldier or his career will suffer. woman only follow for a time until they stop and plant themselves and their family because it's not fair to the children. everyone agrees this company culture is stupid and accomplishes nothing, but that is the way it is, so people have to just accept it. it is very specific to german culture, not sure why.
the good thing about germans is their impeccable tidiness. you can literally eat off their floor. you can eat off any part of a german's house, it is so impeccably clean. germans are clean, organized, perfectionists. the gardens and lawns are tended to with perfection and love and care. wood logs are stacked evenly and covered appropriately so as to not get wet when it rains. clothes are mended and ironed. homes are cleaned at least 1X a week and floors are swept at least every day. toys are organized into their appropriate boxes as well as papers and mail. i have never seen a country so organized in my life. people take great pride in their homes and in their work. a housewife is a job and is upheld to perfection. cakes are all homemade. homework is overseen by mom. kids are taken to sports adn music lessons by mom. acutally men go to work and women do everything else. i say men work but women make the world go 'round. i'm very impressed by german women. they do so much, most of which is never paid. they don't complain or anything, it's just normal. i have the impression though that they believe their work to be inferior to that of a man's. i alone seem to hold the opposite view. in america we would call them supermoms. the minimum bar is just held so high as a mother it's kind of impressive. a lot of mom's still work part time. i think most feel it too much of a strain to work full time, which i understand. imagine an entire country of perfection. men go to work without question and do whatever their companies ask of them, sacrifice everything for their work without question or standing up to authority, good soldiers. women taking care of the welfare of the family, children, home, education, and some work on top of that. it is a very efficient country filled with pride in every identity. everyone takes their work very seriously no matter how menial a job, no matter how little education one has, all work is done with pride and accomplished to perfection. i think i will miss this the most. the pride, the perfection, the cleanliness, the reliability of germans. when a german says something, they mean it. if a german says they are going to do something, or invite you to their home, they mean it. they are wonderfully reliable. i hope it is the one thing i have learned from them becuase i always felt myself to be flaky and unreliable and late. i hope i have changed for the better from germany.
we will soon see. france is a very different culture. i'm curious to see how i will react. it's been 10 yrs since i lived in france and a lot has happened in those 10 yrs. i think i've matured a little i suppose, not sure in which way though. sometimes you are sure of certain things you need to experience in order to advance in life, you know? being a mom will advance in a certain way because it has its challenges. the next step for me is to work independently for myself and hopefully employ other people. this is my next goal in france. that will afford me a whole new learning experience and i have more skills that can be sold in france than in the US. my biggest set backs now are lack of concentration or making choices, lack of focus and fear. i will have to make a decision adn get over my fear pretty fast. i have until christmas to get my situation cleared becuase xavier has a job only until then for sure. worst case scenario he will be unemployed again by christmas. i chose to be stable now. we want to buy a house in 1 yr. that is the goal, so i plan on sticking to it. i want to have a pied a terre in europe and one in the states, minimum. i think it is important and completely feasible.
that is all the news there is here. anais had her birthday party yesterday. i think it was a big success. her best friends are very sad she is leaving. i think anais is sad too. she has made it very clear she does not want to go to school in french, she wants to go to school in english and if not english, then german. i told her she will have to learn french anyway, but we will see what we can do. if we can get her into the int'l school, it will be half english half french, which would be perfect for her. i think she would be soooo happy with other internationals who are all in the same boat. her 2 best friends are internationals. 1 mom is polish living in germany, the other is german but lived in hong kong for 3 yrs and went to an english speaking kindergarten. interesting. i can't blame her, i'm better friends with both their mommy's as well.
i hope this blog hasn't been too negative. i have been getting a little criticism about my negativity. don't mean to be whiny or anything, sometimes i just put out some of my frustrations on paper i suppose. i hope you are all well. and i will be dropping off the radar for sometime until we get the phone line straightened out. with the moves and paying double rents, we are going to be very short on cash, so the phone line might wait until july or even later. so i will let you know when i get back online. i hope you have a nice summer and don't worry if you don't hear any news for awhile, this is how it goes i suppose. speak to you again soon.
love, jennel
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