Some news to share:
I am still teaching at the International School and will continue until the end the the school year on July 2. I kept waiting and getting permission to get an extension. The time kept changing. Finally, all is okayed. I don't think the woman I'm replacing is coming back to school this year. I have an appointment with the school director Monday to see if I can secure a contract for next year. I would really love to continue teaching. It is a great job! I don't work on Wednesdays and we have 8 weeks of vacation during the school year. I work at night and on the weekends though to get my classes set up, but I've worked a bit in advance, so that makes it easier. I don't have soutien anymore during lunch, so I will have 2 hr lunch breaks to get photocopies done and things organized. I also am officially in the public french school system I think. So, I am technically building retirement, I think. I also have just recieved a French social security number.
Anais's first grade french section won a trip to Paris for writing a book. There was a contest with a publisher with 600 first grade classes all over France to write the story of a book and create a cover. Anais's first grade came in 3rd place. They are going to get their book published and will have some kind of ceremony in Paris. The kids are leaving by train from Aix-en-Provence this Tuesday early and will stay in a hotel overnight and come back late Wednesday night. They will see the Eiffel Tower and take a Bateau de Mouche on the Seine. They are very lucky.
I will now start doing some translations for the school soon. When my kids are ill and I take off of work, we have to make it up and one way that everyone is forced to do is translating, since the school has no official translator. So, I am the only person yet to translate. At least I will be able to put that on my resume. This Wednesday I have to work because we will be testing about 30 kids for their English abilities. It is only for pre-school, 3-4 yr olds. But this is my first time doing this. We have a friend whose son is getting tested, there are few spaces available, but I will see what I can do.
I'm going to get my papers together for l'autoentrepreneuer. It is a status for people in France that is easy to begin and become self-employed. I want to buy some educational books for school for references and for me to save time getting my classes set up each time. If the school doesn't pay me back which is likely, I want to be able to deduct my costs if possible. I will have the whole summer to work for myself as well.
I got Nikki into the local daycare here full-time, thank goodness and so far, found one person who is reliable who can watch Nikki when he's ill. I also offerred a set up to pay her to fold our laundry and iron our clothes. I'm overwhelmed with housework, laundry taking up the most amount of time. I don't want to spend my free-time doing laundry. Next on my list is find a cleaning woman to do the dirty work and I'll be all set.
Other news, Xavier got corrective eye surgury 2 weeks ago. He is not yet completely healed, but is seeing already pretty well. Austin will be going on an overnight exchange as well with his pre-school class soon. I still have to get his teacher the papers back.
My next goals are to get l'autoentrepeneuer set up Monday, get the education system figured out. I want to get my translation certification and go back to school and get an advanced degree. Most education is afterall free in France, so I want to take advantage of that. I'm going to keep my career in education because my kids are small, I want to have more time to spend with them. I have a hard time making choices regarding career and I know I choose not to compete in the traditional way, ie. kill myself regarding working hours. I want to have a well rounded life. I still want to write novels and become published, but it is more important right now to get my career started and stabilized a bit. Writing will come later. We also want to buy a house here, though the costs are staggering and the size is nothing more than a human box. That is a little frustrating. I knew I wanted to go back to work. I just didn't realize how badly I needed it. I like getting out of the house and having a purpose. Educating kids, you actually see them learn and increase their knowledge. It is nice. I'm learning a lot. I really wanted to work for myself, but lacked the self-confidence, because I had very little experience. That was my problem. Now, I feel much better, even though I've only been teaching full-time technically for 2 months. I've learned a lot in 2 months. One of my American colleagues said the English teachers got together and all support hiring me on full-time for next year. They are giving me a positive reccomendation. I had a very rocky beginning, but I think everyone does. I still have a lot to learn about teaching methods and more importantly for things that don't come nearly as naturally as teaching as controlling a classroom and children. I'm buying books now about classroom management and sort of reward systems and punishment for naughty kids who are disruptive and don't learn. There
is a huge amount yet that I need to learn regarding teaching. It's nice to use my brain again. Xavier is much happier as well. I finally have a perfect balance in my life. I feel much better and am soooo thankful to be able to work again and really, truly have the perfect job for the current time in my life. I couldn't imagine anything better than what I'm doing right now, including the hours. It is really great! I am very happy and have luckily shortened the length of depression one associates with moving to a new country. The first 4 months being in France were difficult, being socially isolated. But we have started to have friends now and I feel much more integrated. I am very, very fortunate. The international school is a bubble and the international people are well educated and well-travelled. I don't want all of our friends to come from this bubble, but I am soooo thankful to have access to this bubble in the first place.
Have a good day!
Saturday, May 15, 2010
Sunday, February 28, 2010
News March 2010
I finally have some news to share. I finally have a job teaching ESL (English as a second language) at the International School Manosque where my kids go to school. I am replacing a woman who injured her knee and has been out for a few months now. The school got permission to hire me for 1 month. I will be hired like a normal teacher in the French public school system. I got the job as of Friday morning and I start tomorrow. I'm scrambling to find daycare for Nikki. They can take him all day every day but fridays at the daycare, so I am looking for a Nanny for Fridays and so far cannot find anyone. I'm very stressed about this.
I will be teaching 4 yr olds, 3-5 graders. Some are beginners like they never learned English in their lives, some are intermediate. I will be supporting the English teacher for 3-5 graders. They have almost zero supplies and no money to buy some. They have a computer, but I must find out if I can get an access code. I also need an access code for the photocopier, which I do not have. The school kids have work books and the pre-schoolers have nothing. I still have my book that I purchased in Germany for the kindergarten, so that will work out. I have no CD player for music. I will have to see if Aude the director of Primary school can hook me up with the materials. What is odd is I think I will really enjoy this job. I am sooooo happy to go back to work and this has all been extremely short notice.
I really hope I will be able to stay permanently, so we will see how I do. They said they will have no money to pay me after march. I'm not sure how the bureaucracy works in France, except there is a lot of it. I was welcomed on the staff by everyone, so things are moving along. I was praying that they would hire me for March to take over Sue's spot. I am stressed and worried, but very happy. It feels like when I worked for Sphairos in Munich, they just drop you off on the spot with little direction and zero supplies. It is pretty crazy. You just have to go with the flow, except I want to coordinate with the 3-5 grade teacher to support her curriculum.
Other than that, things are ok here. Anais is having a hard time with numbers. She can't grasp anything past 10, I don't understand why. She fails her spelling bees EVERYTIME no matter how much we practice at home, every day, she still fails. So I'm working with her on that.
I would love to remain onboard the school permanently if possible, get the kids set up for daycare and take care of things. That would be great. It is very hard to plan anything in advance when I may or may not have a job for April. They will probably let me know on March 31 if I can continue into April. Craziness. Unless the other teacher comes back, then I will be out of a job, but may be able to secure an ESL teaching job for next year, since they will be expanding their ESL pogram. They are creating a European school in joint with the international school. I'm not sure what that means, but they did tell me that if I do a good job I might be able to come back and teach in the fall for a yr long contract. I hate being stressed like this, but it's normal. I was soooooo happy to get this job. Things couldn't line up any better.
Xavier is not as stressed about his job either. A friend of ours gave us a line about Fusion for Energy which is part of the European commission, good salaries, no tax. They are based in Barcelona Spain, but our friend has a contract here in France for about 5 yrs. Xavier seems just fine with the prospect of maybe moving to Barcelona. Let's just try to get him this job first. They will be publishing their jobs in the next few days. Xavier negociated to work 1-2 days a week out of the Altran office in Aix to put together a large scale risk and project mgt sales pitch-contract for Altran for large scale projects. The rest of the time he works here at ITER. This way he was able to extend his contract until June and now his boss at ITER said he's going to try to get his contract extended until Sept. So, at least now he still has a job until June. After that, we will see. If I could secure a job for next yr for Sept, that would really help us psychologically.
I really wanted to start a company teaching English on my own but had very little work experience and thus don't feel confident enough to do it. I really want to get more work experience. I started teaching a few korean friends French, so that helps to give me confidence as well in working with adults which is different than working with kids. I work a lot on confidence. When I get experience, I feel more confident and will be able to do more later. By the way, one reason why I got this job at the school is because they are looking for ployglotts. Most people can speak about 3 languages fluently. They needed people who speak French fluently and also German or Spanish. I also had ESL certification, probably the only logical decision I made in college. Anyway, this feels like a psychological springboard from which I can re-begin my adult career and finally get rid of my children, god bless their little souls, and do something for myself. Re-establish goals for myself, finally!!
Cheers!
I will be teaching 4 yr olds, 3-5 graders. Some are beginners like they never learned English in their lives, some are intermediate. I will be supporting the English teacher for 3-5 graders. They have almost zero supplies and no money to buy some. They have a computer, but I must find out if I can get an access code. I also need an access code for the photocopier, which I do not have. The school kids have work books and the pre-schoolers have nothing. I still have my book that I purchased in Germany for the kindergarten, so that will work out. I have no CD player for music. I will have to see if Aude the director of Primary school can hook me up with the materials. What is odd is I think I will really enjoy this job. I am sooooo happy to go back to work and this has all been extremely short notice.
I really hope I will be able to stay permanently, so we will see how I do. They said they will have no money to pay me after march. I'm not sure how the bureaucracy works in France, except there is a lot of it. I was welcomed on the staff by everyone, so things are moving along. I was praying that they would hire me for March to take over Sue's spot. I am stressed and worried, but very happy. It feels like when I worked for Sphairos in Munich, they just drop you off on the spot with little direction and zero supplies. It is pretty crazy. You just have to go with the flow, except I want to coordinate with the 3-5 grade teacher to support her curriculum.
Other than that, things are ok here. Anais is having a hard time with numbers. She can't grasp anything past 10, I don't understand why. She fails her spelling bees EVERYTIME no matter how much we practice at home, every day, she still fails. So I'm working with her on that.
I would love to remain onboard the school permanently if possible, get the kids set up for daycare and take care of things. That would be great. It is very hard to plan anything in advance when I may or may not have a job for April. They will probably let me know on March 31 if I can continue into April. Craziness. Unless the other teacher comes back, then I will be out of a job, but may be able to secure an ESL teaching job for next year, since they will be expanding their ESL pogram. They are creating a European school in joint with the international school. I'm not sure what that means, but they did tell me that if I do a good job I might be able to come back and teach in the fall for a yr long contract. I hate being stressed like this, but it's normal. I was soooooo happy to get this job. Things couldn't line up any better.
Xavier is not as stressed about his job either. A friend of ours gave us a line about Fusion for Energy which is part of the European commission, good salaries, no tax. They are based in Barcelona Spain, but our friend has a contract here in France for about 5 yrs. Xavier seems just fine with the prospect of maybe moving to Barcelona. Let's just try to get him this job first. They will be publishing their jobs in the next few days. Xavier negociated to work 1-2 days a week out of the Altran office in Aix to put together a large scale risk and project mgt sales pitch-contract for Altran for large scale projects. The rest of the time he works here at ITER. This way he was able to extend his contract until June and now his boss at ITER said he's going to try to get his contract extended until Sept. So, at least now he still has a job until June. After that, we will see. If I could secure a job for next yr for Sept, that would really help us psychologically.
I really wanted to start a company teaching English on my own but had very little work experience and thus don't feel confident enough to do it. I really want to get more work experience. I started teaching a few korean friends French, so that helps to give me confidence as well in working with adults which is different than working with kids. I work a lot on confidence. When I get experience, I feel more confident and will be able to do more later. By the way, one reason why I got this job at the school is because they are looking for ployglotts. Most people can speak about 3 languages fluently. They needed people who speak French fluently and also German or Spanish. I also had ESL certification, probably the only logical decision I made in college. Anyway, this feels like a psychological springboard from which I can re-begin my adult career and finally get rid of my children, god bless their little souls, and do something for myself. Re-establish goals for myself, finally!!
Cheers!
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Well we made it to France
So, we made the journey from Germany to France on June 13, 2009. It was a long, long, long drive. We left in the evening and stopped someplace in France just beyond Switzerland at around 1:30 AM. We were bone tired and all the hotels made us take 2 rooms because we have 3 kids. Next time I will lie about the number of children I have. It is ridiculous. So when we got to the rooms Xavier and I had an argument as to where the kids would sleep. He won and Anais and Austin slept alone in a room, while XAvier, Nicolas and I slept in our room. So I heard lots of mischief and had to be cop for awhile. Finally, I thought they were asleep around 3 AM and went to sleep myself.
It's a good thing I can smell smoke in my sleep....
When I awoke to smoke fumes and I heard Anais and Austin giggling in the next room. I flew out of bed as pictures of the hotel burning down flashed across my mind, I wondered why aren't the smoke alarms going off? When I got to their bedroom, they had shut the adjoining door and also shut the door to their bed. When I got inside, smoke was pouring out of the lit table lamp next to Austin and he was standing there stark naked laughing. I asked " What is going on in here?" as I ran to the lamp to stop the fire. He answered, "We're baking a cake." : )
I turned off the lamp and pulled the smoldering clothes out of it that were wedged inside the lamp shade. I found Austin's PJ's closest to the light bulb. There were holes and it was covered in embers. I attempted to blow the embers out, but they merely flew off his jammies and landed on the bed. Naturally, starting a fire on the bed is a really bad idea, so I put his PJ's, smoldering embers and all in the sink. Needless to say, his pyjammas are ruined, so he was forced to sleep naked for the rest of the night. I put him in the cot next to Xavier and I went to sleep with Anais in her bed. All was well for the rest of the night.
The next day, we drove another 7 hrs to get to the gite since we didn't have keys to get into the house. The weather was already better in France, the vegetation had changed and it was a lot warmer and SUNNIER!!!!
Oh the sunshine, dry air and the smell of lavender. Oh happiness, oh joy. My nose was in shock. I've had a sinus infection since the year 2004. My nose tried very hard to get a sinus infection. I kept sneezing and sneezing and waiting for it to come, but it never happened. I just sneezed and was well again. How crazy.
KIDS:
Anais spoke French right away and understood that here she doesn't speak German or English. I have to say, I was pretty impressed with her attitude. Sometimes she would cry and say she missed her friends and Martina, her teacher. She also missed Lukas and Eva our neighbors. I felt terrible for her and wanted to get her to make friends as soon as possible. I put the kids in summer camp locally for July and August and started Nicolas in daycare as well. Anais made a few friends in camp and was ok happy. We met the only other American in Greoux, she is from the East coast and is a writer. I thought I was going to faint from joy. I always wanted to meet writers, but I never know any. They always seem so mysterious. Our kids made friends with their kids, so the summer went by without too many hitches.
Austin hated camp and hated France. He wanted to go back to his friends in Germany and asked a lot after his best friends. I explained he won't be able to go to their house because Steingau is too far away now but he'll make other friends here. He didn't much care for that answer. The camp counselors had a lot of grief with Austin because he made no pretense about hating camp. He couldn't understand and would refuse to join the group. He told me no one likes him and he tried to speak to the other kids in German at first, then English. Some of the camp counselors could speak English and tried with him, but he was also unresponsive.
Nicolas reacted ok to daycare. It took the entire summer to slowly get him acclimated to going to daycare, starting at 15 min and finally getting up to 3 hrs. That was a little frustrating. The daycare ladies had an issue because Nicolas doesn't speak French. Mind you, Nikki was barely a year old. They wanted me to speak French to him at home. It was bad memories of Kinderpark with Angelica all over again. I told them I will not speak French to my son, but will do baby sign if they like. Having already taken a course, we quickly ran through the different signs. Well, guess what? German baby sign is totally different from French baby sign, so I had to learn their sign language and practice it with Nicolas. I told them to keep speaking french and using the sign together so he will learn quickly. He's a clever little chap afterall. He can't speak much but can say "It's what?" and "What's that?" That took me a long time to understand. He would point to things and ask what they are. So, when I finally got it, I would tell him the words and repeat them and he would laugh and laugh.
The house is ok. We live in a village of old people. The old and ailing come here to Les Thermes. It is an old Roman Bath House filled with doctors curing every need. So, in the summer Greoux is flooded with silver haired people. I heard the numbers are this: Greoux has 2,500 permanent residents and in the summer we have 40,000 residents, all of whom are retired and ailing. At least it's not Lourdes. Lourdes, France is an interesting place to visit at least once in your lifetime. If you can stomache thousands of people working for the Red Cross, monks, and thousands upon thousands of nuns and little dime store shops of the virgin Mary paraphanilia, and of course the worst form of the sick and ailing, all of whom are very close to death. It is a famous and sacred place where some random farm girl claimed to see the virgin mary appear like 20 times. There is a natural spring that has become holy, so the sick and ailing cue up to be dipped into the holy water to be cured of their ailments.
I just received my carte de sejour so I am legally able to work in France now. My sisters came to visit for about 1 month total. Rhonda kept me very busy as we discovered the area. My favorite is still canoeing in the Gorges du Verdon. Sharone and I went hiking in the Calanques near Marseilles. that was really fun. Oddly, I had never visited the Calanques before. So, I think we had a good time. Life felt very calm after they left.
I haven't experienced much culture shock, just with everyone smacking their kids around. That was a little shocking. No such thing as time outs in France, just smack, smack, smack. Walking across the street, bam. Walking through the grocery store, a little yelling, then smack. Out on the play ground, the kid doesn't come over fast enough or share his toys, smack. The amount of light and semi-frivilous smacking was a little shocking. Beyond that, people were so nice to me. They always talk. There is a lot of banter. I think banter is important with people in the south. It is important to chit chat, who'd a thunk it?
That is all the news there is here. Oh yes the kids got into the international school in Manosque. They are in the English-French section. So they have English 2 days a week and French 2 days a week. They are also in FLE which is French for foreigners to get their French up to speed with the other kids. Hopefully the next news I will give you, I will have a job.
Talk to you again soon. I do think about all of you often. Take care everyone!
Love,
Jennel
It's a good thing I can smell smoke in my sleep....
When I awoke to smoke fumes and I heard Anais and Austin giggling in the next room. I flew out of bed as pictures of the hotel burning down flashed across my mind, I wondered why aren't the smoke alarms going off? When I got to their bedroom, they had shut the adjoining door and also shut the door to their bed. When I got inside, smoke was pouring out of the lit table lamp next to Austin and he was standing there stark naked laughing. I asked " What is going on in here?" as I ran to the lamp to stop the fire. He answered, "We're baking a cake." : )
I turned off the lamp and pulled the smoldering clothes out of it that were wedged inside the lamp shade. I found Austin's PJ's closest to the light bulb. There were holes and it was covered in embers. I attempted to blow the embers out, but they merely flew off his jammies and landed on the bed. Naturally, starting a fire on the bed is a really bad idea, so I put his PJ's, smoldering embers and all in the sink. Needless to say, his pyjammas are ruined, so he was forced to sleep naked for the rest of the night. I put him in the cot next to Xavier and I went to sleep with Anais in her bed. All was well for the rest of the night.
The next day, we drove another 7 hrs to get to the gite since we didn't have keys to get into the house. The weather was already better in France, the vegetation had changed and it was a lot warmer and SUNNIER!!!!
Oh the sunshine, dry air and the smell of lavender. Oh happiness, oh joy. My nose was in shock. I've had a sinus infection since the year 2004. My nose tried very hard to get a sinus infection. I kept sneezing and sneezing and waiting for it to come, but it never happened. I just sneezed and was well again. How crazy.
KIDS:
Anais spoke French right away and understood that here she doesn't speak German or English. I have to say, I was pretty impressed with her attitude. Sometimes she would cry and say she missed her friends and Martina, her teacher. She also missed Lukas and Eva our neighbors. I felt terrible for her and wanted to get her to make friends as soon as possible. I put the kids in summer camp locally for July and August and started Nicolas in daycare as well. Anais made a few friends in camp and was ok happy. We met the only other American in Greoux, she is from the East coast and is a writer. I thought I was going to faint from joy. I always wanted to meet writers, but I never know any. They always seem so mysterious. Our kids made friends with their kids, so the summer went by without too many hitches.
Austin hated camp and hated France. He wanted to go back to his friends in Germany and asked a lot after his best friends. I explained he won't be able to go to their house because Steingau is too far away now but he'll make other friends here. He didn't much care for that answer. The camp counselors had a lot of grief with Austin because he made no pretense about hating camp. He couldn't understand and would refuse to join the group. He told me no one likes him and he tried to speak to the other kids in German at first, then English. Some of the camp counselors could speak English and tried with him, but he was also unresponsive.
Nicolas reacted ok to daycare. It took the entire summer to slowly get him acclimated to going to daycare, starting at 15 min and finally getting up to 3 hrs. That was a little frustrating. The daycare ladies had an issue because Nicolas doesn't speak French. Mind you, Nikki was barely a year old. They wanted me to speak French to him at home. It was bad memories of Kinderpark with Angelica all over again. I told them I will not speak French to my son, but will do baby sign if they like. Having already taken a course, we quickly ran through the different signs. Well, guess what? German baby sign is totally different from French baby sign, so I had to learn their sign language and practice it with Nicolas. I told them to keep speaking french and using the sign together so he will learn quickly. He's a clever little chap afterall. He can't speak much but can say "It's what?" and "What's that?" That took me a long time to understand. He would point to things and ask what they are. So, when I finally got it, I would tell him the words and repeat them and he would laugh and laugh.
The house is ok. We live in a village of old people. The old and ailing come here to Les Thermes. It is an old Roman Bath House filled with doctors curing every need. So, in the summer Greoux is flooded with silver haired people. I heard the numbers are this: Greoux has 2,500 permanent residents and in the summer we have 40,000 residents, all of whom are retired and ailing. At least it's not Lourdes. Lourdes, France is an interesting place to visit at least once in your lifetime. If you can stomache thousands of people working for the Red Cross, monks, and thousands upon thousands of nuns and little dime store shops of the virgin Mary paraphanilia, and of course the worst form of the sick and ailing, all of whom are very close to death. It is a famous and sacred place where some random farm girl claimed to see the virgin mary appear like 20 times. There is a natural spring that has become holy, so the sick and ailing cue up to be dipped into the holy water to be cured of their ailments.
I just received my carte de sejour so I am legally able to work in France now. My sisters came to visit for about 1 month total. Rhonda kept me very busy as we discovered the area. My favorite is still canoeing in the Gorges du Verdon. Sharone and I went hiking in the Calanques near Marseilles. that was really fun. Oddly, I had never visited the Calanques before. So, I think we had a good time. Life felt very calm after they left.
I haven't experienced much culture shock, just with everyone smacking their kids around. That was a little shocking. No such thing as time outs in France, just smack, smack, smack. Walking across the street, bam. Walking through the grocery store, a little yelling, then smack. Out on the play ground, the kid doesn't come over fast enough or share his toys, smack. The amount of light and semi-frivilous smacking was a little shocking. Beyond that, people were so nice to me. They always talk. There is a lot of banter. I think banter is important with people in the south. It is important to chit chat, who'd a thunk it?
That is all the news there is here. Oh yes the kids got into the international school in Manosque. They are in the English-French section. So they have English 2 days a week and French 2 days a week. They are also in FLE which is French for foreigners to get their French up to speed with the other kids. Hopefully the next news I will give you, I will have a job.
Talk to you again soon. I do think about all of you often. Take care everyone!
Love,
Jennel
Monday, June 8, 2009
It is moving time again
Forwarded address:
we have no house number yet, the house is brand new.
Chemin du hameau du Plan
04800 Gréoux-les-Bains
France
don't have a phone number yet. movers come this friday and we will be on the road by saturday. we should arrive in Greoux sometime btw sunday and monday depending on whether or not we stop over at Coralie's house. the neighbors are giving us a good-bye party with the neighborhood on friday at 4 PM. not sure what to expect. Anais and austin will have a good-bye party on wednesday at kindergarten. as usual i have too much to do before friday. xavier flies in thursday night on his birthday. i have to do some presorting now and have accomplished most of what i need to do so it is ok. the kids have off on thursday so not sure what we'll do. i still have to call friends here and say good-bye. not everyone knows we're leaving. some people are sad, some probably not.
i'm not sure how i feel. i don't really feel anything to be honest. i have some friends here and i will miss them but that is about it. i think i will miss some things about germany and about bavaria. bavaria is really beautiful with the rolling meadows, green pine forests and mountains. when it is sunny, it is heaven. it's just sunny maybe 1 out of 3-4 days. i won't miss the rain. what can i say, there is a reason why it is so green. it is cold when it rains even in the summer, so a summer day can be quite extreme in temperature based on how much sun there is. i will miss the recycling attitude, germany is very pro-environment. i might even miss its directness. i had a hard time with people telling me what to do. i was always extremely affronted, but after 5 yrs, i'm used to it and find myself adapting to it. people are just trying to be helpful when they give you advice off the street, they don't mean anything bad by it. i'm not offended anymore. i found that my biggest problem was MY intolerance. i was the one who would not tolerate german culture and i had to adapt. it took a good 3 yrs to understand the culture and be able to adapt to it. it also helps when you make a lot of progress in the language then you can actually communicate and there is less room open for misunderstandings, which happens all the time at the beginning.
everyone thinks we'll be happier in france. xavier seems happier despite being away from the kids. he has been gone now for 1 month and i think for him being away is very tough. for me it has been interesting. i miss xavier and his companionship but i have been quite busy and socialable so it hasn't been that hard to be honest. i was sad during the time before he left but accepted it to be as it is and it was ok. i'm happy and looking forward to seeing him again soon. the kids really miss their papa. i feel a little odd not being too sad. it's kind of strange. i was very very sad when i left texas, but that was also my friends, my surrogate family in austin, and my family and culture knowing i was going to be cut off for a long time. yes, i was very very sad to leave the US and i did start to cry in Jill's car when she dropped me off at the airport. it was hard.
moving to france will be considerably less difficult. my main worries are not knowing where i am or where to shop for groceries, cat litter, things like that. we'll have lots of things to change over like car registration, insurances, kids schools, etc. it's not the end of the world, it's just a lot of work. xavier has already been working diligently on the papers and school registrations on his side. we are trying to get anais into the int'l school in manosque. we'll see if we can pull it off or not. i hope it's free but we don't even know if there is a price.
beyond that everything is more or less normal here. i'm getting anxious to get out of here, kind of antsy you know? i just want to get it over with. it is still really odd not to feel sadness. i don't know what's wrong? i don't feel joy either, just mostly little stresses and worries. i'm worried for anais more than anything else. she will feel the move the most and i don't like taking her away from her friends. even if we stayed here, she would have to go to a different school than her friends anyway because we live out of district and i couldn't get her into holzkirchen where she is going to kindergarten. i find the people feeding into the local school a little dorfisch (too small town) i feel much better with the holzkircheners. my friends are either ausländers (foreigners) or people who have lived abroad. i'm sure it will be the same in france. xavier already has more friends in france in less than 1 month than he has had here in germany in 5 yrs.
germans are very reserved. socially it's like doing a waltz, you don't really touch anyone and you keep dancing around in circles but never get really close. americans don't dance around in circles. there is no formality to making friends. we don't have walls that you need to climb over. we either like each other or we don't. not sure how it is in france. i think it is inbtw US and Germany socially. my language inability was my largest single barrier to creating friendships and relationships. it was very difficult more than anything else. the one thing i have truly learned in germany is isolation. my 9 months in dresden were probably some of the worst if not THE worst 9 months of my life. a woman with no ability to socialize in any remedial way with ANYONE, day in and day out, not able to speak to anyone or have any friends is like taking a flower and depriving her of water and sun. I don't EVER want to experience that again. it is isolation to the fullest and it is hard. you don'T make an effort getting into any social organization if even one exists in dresden because you know you are leaving soon, you just don't have the exact date. the stress i have now is peanuts compared to what i experienced in dresden. xavier and i were like puppets on a string being pulled in every direction and not knowing when the strings will be pulled by his boss and by the restructureing of his company.
moving employees around happens a lot in germany. if you want to get ahead then you have to move the minute they decide they want to put you in Dortmund, Dresden, Frankfurt, you name it. many families end up split. the wife and children remain in one place while the husband moves to another city for a yr or 2 while he works for the same exact company, just because some boss in his company decides it. he has to be a good soldier or his career will suffer. woman only follow for a time until they stop and plant themselves and their family because it's not fair to the children. everyone agrees this company culture is stupid and accomplishes nothing, but that is the way it is, so people have to just accept it. it is very specific to german culture, not sure why.
the good thing about germans is their impeccable tidiness. you can literally eat off their floor. you can eat off any part of a german's house, it is so impeccably clean. germans are clean, organized, perfectionists. the gardens and lawns are tended to with perfection and love and care. wood logs are stacked evenly and covered appropriately so as to not get wet when it rains. clothes are mended and ironed. homes are cleaned at least 1X a week and floors are swept at least every day. toys are organized into their appropriate boxes as well as papers and mail. i have never seen a country so organized in my life. people take great pride in their homes and in their work. a housewife is a job and is upheld to perfection. cakes are all homemade. homework is overseen by mom. kids are taken to sports adn music lessons by mom. acutally men go to work and women do everything else. i say men work but women make the world go 'round. i'm very impressed by german women. they do so much, most of which is never paid. they don't complain or anything, it's just normal. i have the impression though that they believe their work to be inferior to that of a man's. i alone seem to hold the opposite view. in america we would call them supermoms. the minimum bar is just held so high as a mother it's kind of impressive. a lot of mom's still work part time. i think most feel it too much of a strain to work full time, which i understand. imagine an entire country of perfection. men go to work without question and do whatever their companies ask of them, sacrifice everything for their work without question or standing up to authority, good soldiers. women taking care of the welfare of the family, children, home, education, and some work on top of that. it is a very efficient country filled with pride in every identity. everyone takes their work very seriously no matter how menial a job, no matter how little education one has, all work is done with pride and accomplished to perfection. i think i will miss this the most. the pride, the perfection, the cleanliness, the reliability of germans. when a german says something, they mean it. if a german says they are going to do something, or invite you to their home, they mean it. they are wonderfully reliable. i hope it is the one thing i have learned from them becuase i always felt myself to be flaky and unreliable and late. i hope i have changed for the better from germany.
we will soon see. france is a very different culture. i'm curious to see how i will react. it's been 10 yrs since i lived in france and a lot has happened in those 10 yrs. i think i've matured a little i suppose, not sure in which way though. sometimes you are sure of certain things you need to experience in order to advance in life, you know? being a mom will advance in a certain way because it has its challenges. the next step for me is to work independently for myself and hopefully employ other people. this is my next goal in france. that will afford me a whole new learning experience and i have more skills that can be sold in france than in the US. my biggest set backs now are lack of concentration or making choices, lack of focus and fear. i will have to make a decision adn get over my fear pretty fast. i have until christmas to get my situation cleared becuase xavier has a job only until then for sure. worst case scenario he will be unemployed again by christmas. i chose to be stable now. we want to buy a house in 1 yr. that is the goal, so i plan on sticking to it. i want to have a pied a terre in europe and one in the states, minimum. i think it is important and completely feasible.
that is all the news there is here. anais had her birthday party yesterday. i think it was a big success. her best friends are very sad she is leaving. i think anais is sad too. she has made it very clear she does not want to go to school in french, she wants to go to school in english and if not english, then german. i told her she will have to learn french anyway, but we will see what we can do. if we can get her into the int'l school, it will be half english half french, which would be perfect for her. i think she would be soooo happy with other internationals who are all in the same boat. her 2 best friends are internationals. 1 mom is polish living in germany, the other is german but lived in hong kong for 3 yrs and went to an english speaking kindergarten. interesting. i can't blame her, i'm better friends with both their mommy's as well.
i hope this blog hasn't been too negative. i have been getting a little criticism about my negativity. don't mean to be whiny or anything, sometimes i just put out some of my frustrations on paper i suppose. i hope you are all well. and i will be dropping off the radar for sometime until we get the phone line straightened out. with the moves and paying double rents, we are going to be very short on cash, so the phone line might wait until july or even later. so i will let you know when i get back online. i hope you have a nice summer and don't worry if you don't hear any news for awhile, this is how it goes i suppose. speak to you again soon.
love, jennel
we have no house number yet, the house is brand new.
Chemin du hameau du Plan
04800 Gréoux-les-Bains
France
don't have a phone number yet. movers come this friday and we will be on the road by saturday. we should arrive in Greoux sometime btw sunday and monday depending on whether or not we stop over at Coralie's house. the neighbors are giving us a good-bye party with the neighborhood on friday at 4 PM. not sure what to expect. Anais and austin will have a good-bye party on wednesday at kindergarten. as usual i have too much to do before friday. xavier flies in thursday night on his birthday. i have to do some presorting now and have accomplished most of what i need to do so it is ok. the kids have off on thursday so not sure what we'll do. i still have to call friends here and say good-bye. not everyone knows we're leaving. some people are sad, some probably not.
i'm not sure how i feel. i don't really feel anything to be honest. i have some friends here and i will miss them but that is about it. i think i will miss some things about germany and about bavaria. bavaria is really beautiful with the rolling meadows, green pine forests and mountains. when it is sunny, it is heaven. it's just sunny maybe 1 out of 3-4 days. i won't miss the rain. what can i say, there is a reason why it is so green. it is cold when it rains even in the summer, so a summer day can be quite extreme in temperature based on how much sun there is. i will miss the recycling attitude, germany is very pro-environment. i might even miss its directness. i had a hard time with people telling me what to do. i was always extremely affronted, but after 5 yrs, i'm used to it and find myself adapting to it. people are just trying to be helpful when they give you advice off the street, they don't mean anything bad by it. i'm not offended anymore. i found that my biggest problem was MY intolerance. i was the one who would not tolerate german culture and i had to adapt. it took a good 3 yrs to understand the culture and be able to adapt to it. it also helps when you make a lot of progress in the language then you can actually communicate and there is less room open for misunderstandings, which happens all the time at the beginning.
everyone thinks we'll be happier in france. xavier seems happier despite being away from the kids. he has been gone now for 1 month and i think for him being away is very tough. for me it has been interesting. i miss xavier and his companionship but i have been quite busy and socialable so it hasn't been that hard to be honest. i was sad during the time before he left but accepted it to be as it is and it was ok. i'm happy and looking forward to seeing him again soon. the kids really miss their papa. i feel a little odd not being too sad. it's kind of strange. i was very very sad when i left texas, but that was also my friends, my surrogate family in austin, and my family and culture knowing i was going to be cut off for a long time. yes, i was very very sad to leave the US and i did start to cry in Jill's car when she dropped me off at the airport. it was hard.
moving to france will be considerably less difficult. my main worries are not knowing where i am or where to shop for groceries, cat litter, things like that. we'll have lots of things to change over like car registration, insurances, kids schools, etc. it's not the end of the world, it's just a lot of work. xavier has already been working diligently on the papers and school registrations on his side. we are trying to get anais into the int'l school in manosque. we'll see if we can pull it off or not. i hope it's free but we don't even know if there is a price.
beyond that everything is more or less normal here. i'm getting anxious to get out of here, kind of antsy you know? i just want to get it over with. it is still really odd not to feel sadness. i don't know what's wrong? i don't feel joy either, just mostly little stresses and worries. i'm worried for anais more than anything else. she will feel the move the most and i don't like taking her away from her friends. even if we stayed here, she would have to go to a different school than her friends anyway because we live out of district and i couldn't get her into holzkirchen where she is going to kindergarten. i find the people feeding into the local school a little dorfisch (too small town) i feel much better with the holzkircheners. my friends are either ausländers (foreigners) or people who have lived abroad. i'm sure it will be the same in france. xavier already has more friends in france in less than 1 month than he has had here in germany in 5 yrs.
germans are very reserved. socially it's like doing a waltz, you don't really touch anyone and you keep dancing around in circles but never get really close. americans don't dance around in circles. there is no formality to making friends. we don't have walls that you need to climb over. we either like each other or we don't. not sure how it is in france. i think it is inbtw US and Germany socially. my language inability was my largest single barrier to creating friendships and relationships. it was very difficult more than anything else. the one thing i have truly learned in germany is isolation. my 9 months in dresden were probably some of the worst if not THE worst 9 months of my life. a woman with no ability to socialize in any remedial way with ANYONE, day in and day out, not able to speak to anyone or have any friends is like taking a flower and depriving her of water and sun. I don't EVER want to experience that again. it is isolation to the fullest and it is hard. you don'T make an effort getting into any social organization if even one exists in dresden because you know you are leaving soon, you just don't have the exact date. the stress i have now is peanuts compared to what i experienced in dresden. xavier and i were like puppets on a string being pulled in every direction and not knowing when the strings will be pulled by his boss and by the restructureing of his company.
moving employees around happens a lot in germany. if you want to get ahead then you have to move the minute they decide they want to put you in Dortmund, Dresden, Frankfurt, you name it. many families end up split. the wife and children remain in one place while the husband moves to another city for a yr or 2 while he works for the same exact company, just because some boss in his company decides it. he has to be a good soldier or his career will suffer. woman only follow for a time until they stop and plant themselves and their family because it's not fair to the children. everyone agrees this company culture is stupid and accomplishes nothing, but that is the way it is, so people have to just accept it. it is very specific to german culture, not sure why.
the good thing about germans is their impeccable tidiness. you can literally eat off their floor. you can eat off any part of a german's house, it is so impeccably clean. germans are clean, organized, perfectionists. the gardens and lawns are tended to with perfection and love and care. wood logs are stacked evenly and covered appropriately so as to not get wet when it rains. clothes are mended and ironed. homes are cleaned at least 1X a week and floors are swept at least every day. toys are organized into their appropriate boxes as well as papers and mail. i have never seen a country so organized in my life. people take great pride in their homes and in their work. a housewife is a job and is upheld to perfection. cakes are all homemade. homework is overseen by mom. kids are taken to sports adn music lessons by mom. acutally men go to work and women do everything else. i say men work but women make the world go 'round. i'm very impressed by german women. they do so much, most of which is never paid. they don't complain or anything, it's just normal. i have the impression though that they believe their work to be inferior to that of a man's. i alone seem to hold the opposite view. in america we would call them supermoms. the minimum bar is just held so high as a mother it's kind of impressive. a lot of mom's still work part time. i think most feel it too much of a strain to work full time, which i understand. imagine an entire country of perfection. men go to work without question and do whatever their companies ask of them, sacrifice everything for their work without question or standing up to authority, good soldiers. women taking care of the welfare of the family, children, home, education, and some work on top of that. it is a very efficient country filled with pride in every identity. everyone takes their work very seriously no matter how menial a job, no matter how little education one has, all work is done with pride and accomplished to perfection. i think i will miss this the most. the pride, the perfection, the cleanliness, the reliability of germans. when a german says something, they mean it. if a german says they are going to do something, or invite you to their home, they mean it. they are wonderfully reliable. i hope it is the one thing i have learned from them becuase i always felt myself to be flaky and unreliable and late. i hope i have changed for the better from germany.
we will soon see. france is a very different culture. i'm curious to see how i will react. it's been 10 yrs since i lived in france and a lot has happened in those 10 yrs. i think i've matured a little i suppose, not sure in which way though. sometimes you are sure of certain things you need to experience in order to advance in life, you know? being a mom will advance in a certain way because it has its challenges. the next step for me is to work independently for myself and hopefully employ other people. this is my next goal in france. that will afford me a whole new learning experience and i have more skills that can be sold in france than in the US. my biggest set backs now are lack of concentration or making choices, lack of focus and fear. i will have to make a decision adn get over my fear pretty fast. i have until christmas to get my situation cleared becuase xavier has a job only until then for sure. worst case scenario he will be unemployed again by christmas. i chose to be stable now. we want to buy a house in 1 yr. that is the goal, so i plan on sticking to it. i want to have a pied a terre in europe and one in the states, minimum. i think it is important and completely feasible.
that is all the news there is here. anais had her birthday party yesterday. i think it was a big success. her best friends are very sad she is leaving. i think anais is sad too. she has made it very clear she does not want to go to school in french, she wants to go to school in english and if not english, then german. i told her she will have to learn french anyway, but we will see what we can do. if we can get her into the int'l school, it will be half english half french, which would be perfect for her. i think she would be soooo happy with other internationals who are all in the same boat. her 2 best friends are internationals. 1 mom is polish living in germany, the other is german but lived in hong kong for 3 yrs and went to an english speaking kindergarten. interesting. i can't blame her, i'm better friends with both their mommy's as well.
i hope this blog hasn't been too negative. i have been getting a little criticism about my negativity. don't mean to be whiny or anything, sometimes i just put out some of my frustrations on paper i suppose. i hope you are all well. and i will be dropping off the radar for sometime until we get the phone line straightened out. with the moves and paying double rents, we are going to be very short on cash, so the phone line might wait until july or even later. so i will let you know when i get back online. i hope you have a nice summer and don't worry if you don't hear any news for awhile, this is how it goes i suppose. speak to you again soon.
love, jennel
Sunday, May 17, 2009
News: We're Moving to France
wrote some long winded blog for the beginning of may, but didn't send out the link to anyone. new course of info. xavier accepted a job as setting up project mgt in the south of France for a nuclear fusion research thing. it is in an area called cadarache, about 20 km north of aix-en-provence, near marseille. It's in a large area generally known as provence. it's about 1 hr drive to the mediterranean. kids will be able to go to a beach that actually has sand. here the closest sandy beach is in Italy. I haven't had the chance to visit much of ITaly, I'm sorry to say. There are places to visit like the Dolomites and the Adriatic coast. We drove through Tuscany once and it was really beautiful. I wouldn't mind living there. The south of france is supposed to be one of the best parts of france, so I'm happy. I visited Aix-en-Provence once 10 yrs ago and I really liked it as far as cities go. It was clean, sunny, warm and bourgeois, what's there not to like?
Xavier already left. He signed the contract a week ago monday and took off that saturday. I am staying behind with the kids mainly because we haven't found anything to rent yet. We have to pay 3 mos notice here which brings me to the end of July. I figure I will move anytime btw the end of June and July. I've agreed to work here the last week in may and the first 2 weeks in june. It will be very hard now that Xavier is gone. I have no back up and I have to get to munich somehow and find a nanny for Nikki. Travelling, the Nanny, and the extra hours in kindergarten for anais and austin are basically costing me what I will earn in income. But for me it is important to try to see how it goes. This scenario has been one of my biggest fears about going back to work, trying to figure out how to get it all together.
So, will let you know when we have an address. Not sure if Xavier can come back and visit or not. It'S very hard on him. He misses the kids and is very sad not to see them. He is going to miss Nikki's 1st b-day and Anais' 6th b-day. We will also miss his 41st b-day and our 7th wedding anniversary. Apparently June is a very busy month for our family. Austin keeps asking about dad and I think he misses him a lot. I call Xavier at night when the kids go to bed so they can say goodnight to him. I try to explain the situation to them, but I'm not sure how much they understand. So far, nothing has changed much for them except papa is away.
We are not sure if it will be cheaper to rent or to buy, so we'll have to wait and see. If we can buy, then I would. I don't need to see the house to buy it, I don't really care. I do however care about the taxes. They supposedly have some new tax saving laws specific to housing, like you only get rebates when redoing the inside, or building new, or adding on an extra room. It's important that we will be able to rent it out later if and when we decide to move, that's my other main concern.
It's kind of sad to leave now. My German is finally getting good enough that I'm comfortable expressing myself and for the first time in about 4 years, I actually feel like myself. I have finally integrated into the culture and have friends. Now I have to learn how to write properly. You can wing speaking but not writing. Still it has been the first time I'm sort of on my own and it's a nice change. I thought that I'd be more responsible and more proactive and lead my life instead of feeling like I'm waiting. It's hard to have no back up, but it's also a good education. I thought I'd be more stressed or sad, but I feel kind of free. I did start to cry before Xavier left, for about 30 seconds and then I thought "hey why am I crying? I knew this day would come, so why not just try to make the most of this situation?" I think I'm going to be totally stressed when I will be working, so we'll see. All that will happen right in the middle of anais and nikki's b-days. That's going to be rough. normal moms do this kind of thing all the time. not sure how they cope? here they call it "power frau."
What we consider in the states to be "super moms" here is just considered normal ordinary housewife. All moms volunteer with the schools, some are crossing guards, some work part time. All drive their kids to sports and pay for music school or ballet lessons, ski lessons, horseback riding lessons, and swimming lessons. I signed Anais up for gymnastics 1x week at the turnhalle, and 1 X normal indoor sports at the turnhalle so she could go with her friends Magnus and Martha. I also had Austin 1X per week at the turnhalle at the same time as anais. The Turnhalle thing was hell because I had to sit there and wait with nikki and bring snacks and all that. 1 hour sports meant 3 hrs of stress for me. when anais didn't want to go to the turnhalle anymore, I was pretty psyched.
All moms cook for the school festivals or volunteer to work during the festivals and make all homemade goodies from scratch. no one buys instant cake mixes. that would be a travesty. when your kid has a birthday in kindergarten, you better bring a homemade something to school to celebrate. "super moms" don't like keeping their kids in school or kindergarten for too long lengths of time. They like their kids to come home at lunch so they can feed them. Here the biggest meal is lunch. That's when you really cook. That means your freedom ends at 11 because you have to cook lunch so the kids can eat at noon. I don't have the super mom thing. At least, not on purpose. I make homemade food for the kids on their birthdays because the minimum bar is raised so darn high, it'S the least I gotta do. I sign up to bake for the festivals, because I certainly don't want to work selling cake and because like 50 people sign up to bake and it's a lot of pressure to take part. I taught the English course at the school because I was really the best qualified person to do it, since I'm the only native English speaker and I thought it would help my resume, give me some experience since before then I had none and give me a little weight to help get Austin into the kindergarten this year because I'm out of district and don't normally have a prayer getting into this awesome kindergarten. I taught the English class again this year because it was the least I could do to say thanks for getting Austin into this school and I promised them last year I would do it again, plus it's fun. "Super moms" and "Power Fraus" That's being a mom in Germany.
Xavier already left. He signed the contract a week ago monday and took off that saturday. I am staying behind with the kids mainly because we haven't found anything to rent yet. We have to pay 3 mos notice here which brings me to the end of July. I figure I will move anytime btw the end of June and July. I've agreed to work here the last week in may and the first 2 weeks in june. It will be very hard now that Xavier is gone. I have no back up and I have to get to munich somehow and find a nanny for Nikki. Travelling, the Nanny, and the extra hours in kindergarten for anais and austin are basically costing me what I will earn in income. But for me it is important to try to see how it goes. This scenario has been one of my biggest fears about going back to work, trying to figure out how to get it all together.
So, will let you know when we have an address. Not sure if Xavier can come back and visit or not. It'S very hard on him. He misses the kids and is very sad not to see them. He is going to miss Nikki's 1st b-day and Anais' 6th b-day. We will also miss his 41st b-day and our 7th wedding anniversary. Apparently June is a very busy month for our family. Austin keeps asking about dad and I think he misses him a lot. I call Xavier at night when the kids go to bed so they can say goodnight to him. I try to explain the situation to them, but I'm not sure how much they understand. So far, nothing has changed much for them except papa is away.
We are not sure if it will be cheaper to rent or to buy, so we'll have to wait and see. If we can buy, then I would. I don't need to see the house to buy it, I don't really care. I do however care about the taxes. They supposedly have some new tax saving laws specific to housing, like you only get rebates when redoing the inside, or building new, or adding on an extra room. It's important that we will be able to rent it out later if and when we decide to move, that's my other main concern.
It's kind of sad to leave now. My German is finally getting good enough that I'm comfortable expressing myself and for the first time in about 4 years, I actually feel like myself. I have finally integrated into the culture and have friends. Now I have to learn how to write properly. You can wing speaking but not writing. Still it has been the first time I'm sort of on my own and it's a nice change. I thought that I'd be more responsible and more proactive and lead my life instead of feeling like I'm waiting. It's hard to have no back up, but it's also a good education. I thought I'd be more stressed or sad, but I feel kind of free. I did start to cry before Xavier left, for about 30 seconds and then I thought "hey why am I crying? I knew this day would come, so why not just try to make the most of this situation?" I think I'm going to be totally stressed when I will be working, so we'll see. All that will happen right in the middle of anais and nikki's b-days. That's going to be rough. normal moms do this kind of thing all the time. not sure how they cope? here they call it "power frau."
What we consider in the states to be "super moms" here is just considered normal ordinary housewife. All moms volunteer with the schools, some are crossing guards, some work part time. All drive their kids to sports and pay for music school or ballet lessons, ski lessons, horseback riding lessons, and swimming lessons. I signed Anais up for gymnastics 1x week at the turnhalle, and 1 X normal indoor sports at the turnhalle so she could go with her friends Magnus and Martha. I also had Austin 1X per week at the turnhalle at the same time as anais. The Turnhalle thing was hell because I had to sit there and wait with nikki and bring snacks and all that. 1 hour sports meant 3 hrs of stress for me. when anais didn't want to go to the turnhalle anymore, I was pretty psyched.
All moms cook for the school festivals or volunteer to work during the festivals and make all homemade goodies from scratch. no one buys instant cake mixes. that would be a travesty. when your kid has a birthday in kindergarten, you better bring a homemade something to school to celebrate. "super moms" don't like keeping their kids in school or kindergarten for too long lengths of time. They like their kids to come home at lunch so they can feed them. Here the biggest meal is lunch. That's when you really cook. That means your freedom ends at 11 because you have to cook lunch so the kids can eat at noon. I don't have the super mom thing. At least, not on purpose. I make homemade food for the kids on their birthdays because the minimum bar is raised so darn high, it'S the least I gotta do. I sign up to bake for the festivals, because I certainly don't want to work selling cake and because like 50 people sign up to bake and it's a lot of pressure to take part. I taught the English course at the school because I was really the best qualified person to do it, since I'm the only native English speaker and I thought it would help my resume, give me some experience since before then I had none and give me a little weight to help get Austin into the kindergarten this year because I'm out of district and don't normally have a prayer getting into this awesome kindergarten. I taught the English class again this year because it was the least I could do to say thanks for getting Austin into this school and I promised them last year I would do it again, plus it's fun. "Super moms" and "Power Fraus" That's being a mom in Germany.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
News May
We may be moving.
Xavier has found a job in the south of france. we're still waiting on the contract, but they want him to start working in 1 week. we've been interviewing moving companies, so this is feeling quite real. I told the children there is a good chance we'll move to france soon. they didn't seem to care either way. anais didn't want to be separated from me. she said "but i need you." I told her we would stay together as a family. I've already agreed to work here in munich for the last week in may and the first 2 weeks in june (holiday called pfingston) so now i have to find a tagesmutter to take care of the kids since there is a good chance i will be alone.
until we sign a contract, i will continue as though we are staying here in germany and we are living on unemployment. we have to give 3 mos notice for our house rental here in munich, which means we ought to at least give notice may 1.
when moves go, they go fast. when we left texas, it took maybe 3 weeks from the day we signed the contract to being on the plane. it was fast and you are never prepared. this time my friendships aren't that deep in germany considering i've been here for 4,5 yrs.
at least now i know what to expect regarding moving with children, the conplications with language, so and and so forth. i need to get a work permit in france. we will do that straight away. i think france is better set up for women to work. it might be easier, plus everyone works so i would be alone by myself anyway. it's hard to move. i have a better idea as to what i want to do now though, so that's already something, not just trying to survive the day. anais will need a lot of help with school and we won'T be able to move again now or at least remain in english or french languges regarding school for the kids. i wouldn't mind after a few yrs taking a sabatical from france and going for a few years in india or something like that. that would be interesting.
our next goal is to become stable and no matter what happens settle in the south of france. we opened a savings account last yr to buy a house in france. that will mature in 2 yrs. these accounts secure a low interest rate when you buy. we need to rent for 2 yrs and give us a chance to visit the area and see where we want to settle. i think we're following my friend barbara'S path. they are german and lived in CA for about 7 yrs. her husband wanted to stay in CA but Barbara was home sick. her husband found a job in Zurich. they thought Europe is Europe so it shouldn't be a big deal. they lived in a village and had trouble integrating and they realized that Zurich is not Germany, so after about 3 yrs they moved again, this time back to munich. they decided not to live in a village because though spacious and calm, there is a lack of infrastructure, so they decided to go to a town and build a house. we went from suburbia usa, to city dresden, to village munich and i suspect we will end up in town in france and buy a place. we cannot buy here because 1. cost, but mostly because when we move again, we don't have a good enough command of german to be able to write contracts and rent it out. i don't feel comfortable doing that. plus your mortgage is 2X what you can receive in rent so financially it doesn't make any sense. here there is no tax rebate on owning a house, just a lot of money out of our pocket. everyone becomes house poor when they own. we have to learn about the tax benefits in france. i guess they have some new laws now that give tax benefits.
first of course is wait for the contract. in the meantime, anais is set up to go to school here locally in the fall. she will be going to Dietramszell. she only knows 1 person there so moving to france won't be such a great upset. she will have a hard time at first in france because she is very far behind in french and the german kindergarten is behind france in education. kids in france start learning in kindergarten, while in germany they only learn to count to maybe 10 or 20. french kids already learn letters and cursive in kindergarten, so anais will be behind on top of the language difficulty. I work with her on the alphabet, but she seems to learn better in school. i'll put the kids in speech therapy again in france. i have a lot of papers to update here like passports before we leave. still haven't done it.
austin had his 4th birthday yesterday by the way. we had a party. i asked him who he would like to invite from school and they were all girls. so i invited them plus a few boys. i think he had a good time.
we do have friends here, just like we did in TX, but i know we'll make more friends in france as well. it's just hard to keep up. my friendships haven't been that deep here because of the language barrier. mind you a german speaking english is the same as me speaking german, our conversations are limited to our vocabulary. expressing complicated thoughts requires a richness of vocabulary so conversations are always limited. it can be frustrating. sometimes its also personalities that you just can't get deep or thoughts out of people. my neighbor is lovely and british, but i can't get anything deeper than surface conversation out of her. i've known her for 3 yrs and i don't think she's ever expressed much of an opinion on anything. it's a little frustrating.
i have some photos to share so i'll post them if i can figure it out. i hope you're all okay and i'll let you know what's going on here. not sure when xavier will start his new job. the company wants him to start may 11 or the 18th, but we have no contract yet and no place to live in france, so i think they're a little confused about reality. we will need to go and look at the area as well. this time we have to take all 3 kids with us. it will be difficult. we can't ask my mother in law to come and watch the kids alone, it's too much for her to handle being alone in Germany. And my father in law cannot help her anymore. I need to visit schools and see if we can get the kids into the free int'l school in Manosque. i need to make a home now. no more transition lifestyle. i want my own place with a little garden. i think it is much sunnier in the south of france than here and the kids keep asking to go to the beach. the nearest beach here is Italy. if i ever lived in france i would want to live either in the south, massif centrale, or les landes. so it's good.
will let you know more about news when something develops. I will also write a blurb on Germany, but only positive things. I've had a bit of criticism that my blogs about Germany are supremely negative. I don't mean for that to happen. there are many good and positive things here. I'll give examples. I think so far, I've given an entirely unfairly negative view point about germany, so i will be more fair. talk to you again soon.
Xavier has found a job in the south of france. we're still waiting on the contract, but they want him to start working in 1 week. we've been interviewing moving companies, so this is feeling quite real. I told the children there is a good chance we'll move to france soon. they didn't seem to care either way. anais didn't want to be separated from me. she said "but i need you." I told her we would stay together as a family. I've already agreed to work here in munich for the last week in may and the first 2 weeks in june (holiday called pfingston) so now i have to find a tagesmutter to take care of the kids since there is a good chance i will be alone.
until we sign a contract, i will continue as though we are staying here in germany and we are living on unemployment. we have to give 3 mos notice for our house rental here in munich, which means we ought to at least give notice may 1.
when moves go, they go fast. when we left texas, it took maybe 3 weeks from the day we signed the contract to being on the plane. it was fast and you are never prepared. this time my friendships aren't that deep in germany considering i've been here for 4,5 yrs.
at least now i know what to expect regarding moving with children, the conplications with language, so and and so forth. i need to get a work permit in france. we will do that straight away. i think france is better set up for women to work. it might be easier, plus everyone works so i would be alone by myself anyway. it's hard to move. i have a better idea as to what i want to do now though, so that's already something, not just trying to survive the day. anais will need a lot of help with school and we won'T be able to move again now or at least remain in english or french languges regarding school for the kids. i wouldn't mind after a few yrs taking a sabatical from france and going for a few years in india or something like that. that would be interesting.
our next goal is to become stable and no matter what happens settle in the south of france. we opened a savings account last yr to buy a house in france. that will mature in 2 yrs. these accounts secure a low interest rate when you buy. we need to rent for 2 yrs and give us a chance to visit the area and see where we want to settle. i think we're following my friend barbara'S path. they are german and lived in CA for about 7 yrs. her husband wanted to stay in CA but Barbara was home sick. her husband found a job in Zurich. they thought Europe is Europe so it shouldn't be a big deal. they lived in a village and had trouble integrating and they realized that Zurich is not Germany, so after about 3 yrs they moved again, this time back to munich. they decided not to live in a village because though spacious and calm, there is a lack of infrastructure, so they decided to go to a town and build a house. we went from suburbia usa, to city dresden, to village munich and i suspect we will end up in town in france and buy a place. we cannot buy here because 1. cost, but mostly because when we move again, we don't have a good enough command of german to be able to write contracts and rent it out. i don't feel comfortable doing that. plus your mortgage is 2X what you can receive in rent so financially it doesn't make any sense. here there is no tax rebate on owning a house, just a lot of money out of our pocket. everyone becomes house poor when they own. we have to learn about the tax benefits in france. i guess they have some new laws now that give tax benefits.
first of course is wait for the contract. in the meantime, anais is set up to go to school here locally in the fall. she will be going to Dietramszell. she only knows 1 person there so moving to france won't be such a great upset. she will have a hard time at first in france because she is very far behind in french and the german kindergarten is behind france in education. kids in france start learning in kindergarten, while in germany they only learn to count to maybe 10 or 20. french kids already learn letters and cursive in kindergarten, so anais will be behind on top of the language difficulty. I work with her on the alphabet, but she seems to learn better in school. i'll put the kids in speech therapy again in france. i have a lot of papers to update here like passports before we leave. still haven't done it.
austin had his 4th birthday yesterday by the way. we had a party. i asked him who he would like to invite from school and they were all girls. so i invited them plus a few boys. i think he had a good time.
we do have friends here, just like we did in TX, but i know we'll make more friends in france as well. it's just hard to keep up. my friendships haven't been that deep here because of the language barrier. mind you a german speaking english is the same as me speaking german, our conversations are limited to our vocabulary. expressing complicated thoughts requires a richness of vocabulary so conversations are always limited. it can be frustrating. sometimes its also personalities that you just can't get deep or thoughts out of people. my neighbor is lovely and british, but i can't get anything deeper than surface conversation out of her. i've known her for 3 yrs and i don't think she's ever expressed much of an opinion on anything. it's a little frustrating.
i have some photos to share so i'll post them if i can figure it out. i hope you're all okay and i'll let you know what's going on here. not sure when xavier will start his new job. the company wants him to start may 11 or the 18th, but we have no contract yet and no place to live in france, so i think they're a little confused about reality. we will need to go and look at the area as well. this time we have to take all 3 kids with us. it will be difficult. we can't ask my mother in law to come and watch the kids alone, it's too much for her to handle being alone in Germany. And my father in law cannot help her anymore. I need to visit schools and see if we can get the kids into the free int'l school in Manosque. i need to make a home now. no more transition lifestyle. i want my own place with a little garden. i think it is much sunnier in the south of france than here and the kids keep asking to go to the beach. the nearest beach here is Italy. if i ever lived in france i would want to live either in the south, massif centrale, or les landes. so it's good.
will let you know more about news when something develops. I will also write a blurb on Germany, but only positive things. I've had a bit of criticism that my blogs about Germany are supremely negative. I don't mean for that to happen. there are many good and positive things here. I'll give examples. I think so far, I've given an entirely unfairly negative view point about germany, so i will be more fair. talk to you again soon.
Friday, March 20, 2009
Germany News March 2009
Hello everyone, I hope you are all well and that the economy in the states isn't hitting you too hard, for those of you living there. For those of you living outside the states I know there is an economic recession hitting all over Europe as well, so I hope you are not getting hit too hard especially if you are an expat. It seems the expats are some of the first to get laid off.
Firstly, the kids are all good. Nikki is 9 mos now and has 2 teeth. Anais will start 1st grade in the fall. Getting her into school in Holzkirchen looks like a no-go, so she will probably have to go to school in Dietramszell, the local village school. She will have an in-school prufung to see if they think she's ready to attend. She already had an exam by the speech therapist who said that Anais is more or less ready for school. Her German is still coming along. The teachers say she has no accent. She is starting to correct my pronunciation, which I do need help in. Austin is flying along in German. I think he might be gifted in terms of languages, or perhaps just gifted in general. The speech therapist said he has the same German capacity as that of a normal German 3 yr old. The difference is he's been in school only for 7 mos.
We are still very unstable and not sure where we are going next. Xavier has been laid off. We received no bonus this yr and salary will officially end in 1 week. He looked for jobs with companies for awhile to no avail. He had a job interview in the south of france which went nowhere. He is setting himself up to become self-employed and getting his company ready. Yesterday, Xavier got contacted by a company located in Aix-en-Provence (south france) for a job and he will be flying there wed and staying for a week. This one looks very promising. It will start mid-April if it does happen, but he will take a pay cut, but it will still be much higher than unemployment, which will not suffice for our basic needs.
I have been looking for jobs here in Germany and have had 2 interviews so far. Both interviews have passed with flying colors. However, they are both for free lance work and will not bring too many hours. But at least, if I can work, I know it will help us eat. I will be teaching English and perhaps French as well. The jobs are with 2 different companies, both private foreign language schools. I have a wonderful niche here having English as a mother tongue. I've been teaching the english class at the kid's kindergarten for the past 2 yrs now and I feel very confident with my capacity for teaching 5 yr olds and have taught a little private English for adults. I really want to teach business English because that's where the money is and that's where I lack experience. My last interview was today and I offered to teach French as well. The owner was hesitent because I had only studied French. Then we started speaking in French. Yes, she is German who is fluent in English and French. Well, after that conversation, she's got me on the list to teach French as well. She told me I have no accent in French. I said, "you're very kind." So in perparation for today's interview I bought my very first suit this week. I got it used and it still smells like someone's basement, but it fits. All my business clothes are hand-me downs from highschool. I think it's time I invested a little in updating my wardrobe, even if it's from second hand stores. My body has changed a lot after having kids (mostly for the worse), so my clothes don't fit right anymore. I hope to start working soon. Xavier just might get this job in France, who knows. No matter what happens, I plan on having the kids finish this school yr. I'm not going to get my hopes up for this south of France job, though I wouldn't mind living in France. I plan on going back to work no matter where I am. I love my kids, but I need to have other activities outside of them. Anais' kindergarten is also giving us foreign mom's a German course for 10 weeks. I went to the first one wed. I enjoyed it. Half the women are from Turkey, 1 from India, 1 from Italy, 1 from Croatia. 1/2 speak German well. The other 1/2 hardly speak German at all. I'm actually in the half that speak well, but I totally identify with those who can't speak. That was my life 4 yrs ago and it's horrible. There is no worse feeling than not being able to function within your immediate environment. You are really handicapped and only a lot of time and some work will get you past it. It always takes more time than you want. It is very frustrating. I am finally at the level where I can make small talk with other moms. I have found that I am relatively well known, considering I spoke so little with people in our area. There is something important to having contacts here. Everyone knows everyone else and when you are tri-lingual American, you do stand out, for the better. I think it will help when I try to get work, especially if I work for myself in the area. The more contact I'm getting with the locals, the better off I feel. It's odd, but there is immediate results to networking here.
I suspect we will have much more good news to come shortly. We shall see. Or starvation.... : )
I have learned some things in Germany. I've learned the true meaning of competence. The entire country is competent. When a German says they will do something, they do it. If you make plans next week on Wed, expect them at your door at the exact time discussed. They have complete follow through with work, even if you need something from someone who is absent. Their collegue can leave them a little sticky note and my God it will actually get done. There is a total pride in everything and things are done to the utmost perfection. Homes are kept up with orderly and cleaness (ok, mine aspires to that but still has a long way to go). It has had a positive effect on me. There are things I've tried to adapt to myself, things that I feel I lack that I want to be, like competent and reliable and perhaps to a lesser degree, keeping a perfectly tidy house.
So that's the news for now. I have to say, I'm feeling very good about myself and very positive and I haven't felt this way in a long time. This unfortunate situation of Xavier's has really afforded me new possibilities for the first time, especially in terms of working. Xavier can watch the kids and help when I have interviews. I didn't have that luxury before. I was totally on my own without knowing a baby-sitter. It's a totally different situation when your man is available to help you, and there is no greater motivation than when you're facing imminent starvation. : )
I hope you are well and I give all of you my love.
Firstly, the kids are all good. Nikki is 9 mos now and has 2 teeth. Anais will start 1st grade in the fall. Getting her into school in Holzkirchen looks like a no-go, so she will probably have to go to school in Dietramszell, the local village school. She will have an in-school prufung to see if they think she's ready to attend. She already had an exam by the speech therapist who said that Anais is more or less ready for school. Her German is still coming along. The teachers say she has no accent. She is starting to correct my pronunciation, which I do need help in. Austin is flying along in German. I think he might be gifted in terms of languages, or perhaps just gifted in general. The speech therapist said he has the same German capacity as that of a normal German 3 yr old. The difference is he's been in school only for 7 mos.
We are still very unstable and not sure where we are going next. Xavier has been laid off. We received no bonus this yr and salary will officially end in 1 week. He looked for jobs with companies for awhile to no avail. He had a job interview in the south of france which went nowhere. He is setting himself up to become self-employed and getting his company ready. Yesterday, Xavier got contacted by a company located in Aix-en-Provence (south france) for a job and he will be flying there wed and staying for a week. This one looks very promising. It will start mid-April if it does happen, but he will take a pay cut, but it will still be much higher than unemployment, which will not suffice for our basic needs.
I have been looking for jobs here in Germany and have had 2 interviews so far. Both interviews have passed with flying colors. However, they are both for free lance work and will not bring too many hours. But at least, if I can work, I know it will help us eat. I will be teaching English and perhaps French as well. The jobs are with 2 different companies, both private foreign language schools. I have a wonderful niche here having English as a mother tongue. I've been teaching the english class at the kid's kindergarten for the past 2 yrs now and I feel very confident with my capacity for teaching 5 yr olds and have taught a little private English for adults. I really want to teach business English because that's where the money is and that's where I lack experience. My last interview was today and I offered to teach French as well. The owner was hesitent because I had only studied French. Then we started speaking in French. Yes, she is German who is fluent in English and French. Well, after that conversation, she's got me on the list to teach French as well. She told me I have no accent in French. I said, "you're very kind." So in perparation for today's interview I bought my very first suit this week. I got it used and it still smells like someone's basement, but it fits. All my business clothes are hand-me downs from highschool. I think it's time I invested a little in updating my wardrobe, even if it's from second hand stores. My body has changed a lot after having kids (mostly for the worse), so my clothes don't fit right anymore. I hope to start working soon. Xavier just might get this job in France, who knows. No matter what happens, I plan on having the kids finish this school yr. I'm not going to get my hopes up for this south of France job, though I wouldn't mind living in France. I plan on going back to work no matter where I am. I love my kids, but I need to have other activities outside of them. Anais' kindergarten is also giving us foreign mom's a German course for 10 weeks. I went to the first one wed. I enjoyed it. Half the women are from Turkey, 1 from India, 1 from Italy, 1 from Croatia. 1/2 speak German well. The other 1/2 hardly speak German at all. I'm actually in the half that speak well, but I totally identify with those who can't speak. That was my life 4 yrs ago and it's horrible. There is no worse feeling than not being able to function within your immediate environment. You are really handicapped and only a lot of time and some work will get you past it. It always takes more time than you want. It is very frustrating. I am finally at the level where I can make small talk with other moms. I have found that I am relatively well known, considering I spoke so little with people in our area. There is something important to having contacts here. Everyone knows everyone else and when you are tri-lingual American, you do stand out, for the better. I think it will help when I try to get work, especially if I work for myself in the area. The more contact I'm getting with the locals, the better off I feel. It's odd, but there is immediate results to networking here.
I suspect we will have much more good news to come shortly. We shall see. Or starvation.... : )
I have learned some things in Germany. I've learned the true meaning of competence. The entire country is competent. When a German says they will do something, they do it. If you make plans next week on Wed, expect them at your door at the exact time discussed. They have complete follow through with work, even if you need something from someone who is absent. Their collegue can leave them a little sticky note and my God it will actually get done. There is a total pride in everything and things are done to the utmost perfection. Homes are kept up with orderly and cleaness (ok, mine aspires to that but still has a long way to go). It has had a positive effect on me. There are things I've tried to adapt to myself, things that I feel I lack that I want to be, like competent and reliable and perhaps to a lesser degree, keeping a perfectly tidy house.
So that's the news for now. I have to say, I'm feeling very good about myself and very positive and I haven't felt this way in a long time. This unfortunate situation of Xavier's has really afforded me new possibilities for the first time, especially in terms of working. Xavier can watch the kids and help when I have interviews. I didn't have that luxury before. I was totally on my own without knowing a baby-sitter. It's a totally different situation when your man is available to help you, and there is no greater motivation than when you're facing imminent starvation. : )
I hope you are well and I give all of you my love.
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